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Dumbledore

Dumbledore, Dumbledore

Bumblebore, Fumbledork.

Oh, how silly that name is.

And that doesn't even scratch the surface.

Welcome to the Dumbledore Problems page!

Dumbledore sucks on a monumental scale. More than I originally thought when he turned out to be Harry Potter author J.K. Rowling's first political tool for a left-wing agenda. Rowling cunningly kept that under her hat until the original HP series was written and had sold like hotcakes. Already, the seventh book was shedding some bad light on not just Dumbledore, but Harry's dead parents as well, which, really, *REALLY* STUNK! Then the Dumbledore thing got political, to top that all off..

Then, when some of us thought there was finally an end to this HP business, out came the beastly "Fantastic Beasts" and with that, apparently more exploration into the life of the young Dumbledore and his cute little cozy with none other than the Voldemort runner-up Grindelwald. Apparently that was the little mess being drudged up and hinted at in book 7.

And, to top that off, guess what?

Dumbledore is also Rowling's favourite character.

Gosh, wonder why?

So...He isn't and never was the totally good and wise person the first few HP books might have readers think... But even then, he really sucked.

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On December 3, 2014, Emily Heller wrote an article titled:

Why Your Favorite Harry Potter Character Actually Sucks

She chose 1 through 7, from Harry to Dumbledore. Here is what she says about Dumbledore.

Emily Heller: And speaking of emotionally abusive authority figures not worthy of being your son's namesake...

7. Dumbledore

I get that J.K. was trying to send a message about the paradoxical power and frailty of love and that's great and interesting, but there's no denying that Dumbledore handled his relationship with Harry terribly.

He was distant with Harry but clearly played favorites to him and his friends which only served to alienate them further from the other arsehole magical teenagers that went to Hogwarts. Not to mention the fact that he was completely negligent when a preteen boy was bopping around his school risking his life, who he was actually just training to die at a later date. So, yeah, he's not the genocidal racist dictator that Rita Skeeter made him out to be, but he certainly treated Harry's life like an asset, rather than a human's existence.

Please see what's written about Harry on this link.

Please see what's written about other characters on this link.

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Why Albus Dumbledore Sucks

Justin Carl Gordon Nov 14, 2016 At Southern Illinois University Carbondale

He is a bum and I don't like him.

With the release of Fantastic Beasts upon us, I thought I'd talk some Harry Potter.

I firmly believe Albus Dumbledore is one of the biggest causes of death and destruction in the Harry Potter franchise. I find it hilarious that Rowling felt the need to give Dumbledore a complicated backstory in order to make readers question Dumbledore’s morals in book 7. It’s funny, because she really didn’t even need to do that in order to showcase Dumbledore as an imperfect figure. He is not an effective headmaster and he is a questionable human being.

To start off with book one, he hires Qurriell and hides a dangerous stone within his school. He knew Voldemort was going to be coming for that magical object and was willing to risk the lives of his students to stroke his ego. He even tells Snape to keep an eye on Qurriell, which means he was suspicious. Yet, he did not act on it. Dumbledore would have been held responsible for the death Harry Potter and other students for insane reasons.

Ocean Elf: Just a note - it's spelled 'Quirrel' like squirrel minus the 's'.

Justin Carl Gordon : In book 2, kids are being petrified and he carries on like business as usual. He is risking more lives of students in order to watch what happens. Far be it for him to get off his butt and look for the Chamber of Secrets, which isn’t all that hard to find. No, that would require him to actually do his job.

Ocean Elf: Lol. There's a lot off about this guy.

Justin Carl Gordon: With Book 4, he has an imposter Moody roaming the halls of Hogwarts. It is no secret that Dumbledore is supposed to be wise. The real Alastor Moody was in the Order of The Phoenix. Are you going to tell me that he completely fooled Dumbledore? I don’t buy it. Even Draco Malfoy, a second year student who had no clue what Polyjuice Potion was, questioned the identity of Crabbe and Goyle when Ron and Harry played them. Dumbledore not acting on this makes him partially responsible for the return of Voldemort. All because of his obsession with watching things play out for his own sick amusement and laziness.

Book 5, he refuses to act rational when talking to Fudge about the return of Voldemort. He speaks in a matter of fact fashion and acts all high and mighty about it. He did not sit down and have a proper chat with him saying his stance as headmaster and why Fudge should listen to him. No wonder an idiot like Fudge was paranoid about Dumbledore. Dumbledore was on a massive ego trip and on a self-righteous kick.

Finally, in book 6, he pretends to care about the innocence of Draco Malfoy, when in all actuality he is only playing a mental mind game with Voldemort. You see, Dumbledore, high on his own ego, put on a Horcrux which made his days numbered. Realizing he can’t let Voldemort know that Voldemort was the actual cause for his death, he devised this elaborate scheme to get Snape to kill him. That way Voldemort would never be viewed as responsible for his death. Either via Draco or by Horcrux. Otherwise, he would have acted when Draco was accidentally harming students.

Ocean Elf: Wow, convoluted and messed up.

Justin Carl Gordon: Dumbledore is not a good headmaster. He is on the same ego trip and is high on his own power as Voldemort. Difference is, Voldemort is not as subtle in his treachery. Dumbledore is also in-directly the cause for Voldemort’s madness. Dumbledore plays favorites, does not act when he should and he is in all around fustilarian.

Ocean Elf: Even now, I will not give Voldy any breaks. He is responsible for his own madness, which is not actually madness at all, but ego-tripping, power-lust, greed, and anything else bad. Voldy is a long-winded scum of the earth.

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15 Reasons Why We Hate Dumbledore

The benevolent headmaster, protector of Hogwarts, and father figure -- oh, and did we mention a completely horrid person?

BY STACI MILLER – ON JUN 16TH IN GEEKY

At first glance, Dumbledore is one of the good guys of the Harry Potter series. He’s the benevolent headmaster of Hogwarts, he helps Harry fight Voldemort, and he comes across as nothing but friendly – for the first few books, at least.

But Dumbledore is actually one of the most complex characters in the series, because if you look more deeply, your opinion will probably change. Mine certainly did. As the books go on, little details are revealed about Dumbledore that suggest he might not be the kindly old grandfather he was portrayed to be at first.

If you’re not convinced, this list will do the trick – I’ve found the 15 top reasons why we should actually all hate Dumbledore. And believe me, the list isn’t exhaustive!

15He Took The House Cup From Slytherin

For the kids of Gryffindor, this was a really nice move. The supposedly evil Slytherin House thought they’d won the house cup and then Dumbledore swoops in there with some house points for Gryffindor and they just overtake Slytherin. The house points were deserved–Harry fought off Voldemort, he deserved more than house points–but this was an incredibly cruel way to do it. Not all of Slytherin are mean bullies, and there are kids as young as 11 in that house – so to casually pull out the rug from under them in front of the whole school was actually kind of petty and horrible.

This is the only time in the books when I actually felt I was on Draco Malfoy’s side. Dumbledore was definitely biased here, and he could have handled this far more tactfully.

Ocean Elf: Oh, wow, that quidditch stuff was so boring I don't remember much of it at all. But yeah, always the rivalry between those two houses and then suddenly something or other had to happen for Harry to win. Snore-fest. You remember much more than I do about that particular match.

STACI MILLER: 14He Lied To Harry

Dumbledore knew Harry was going to have to die eventually. Sure, he knew he might be able to bounce back from it because of the Horcrux but ultimately, it was a totally untested theory because it had never been done before. Even then, he was still absolutely willing to bring Harry up and let him go and die without even telling him why. What?!

Ocean Elf: This horcrux nonsense lost me immediately anyway, but it's not as if Dumbledore was running a safe school right from the start.

STACI MILLER:: I can understand this when he was a child. No 11-year-old is going to take that well. But as Harry matured quicker than any child (ever)

Ocean Elf: Or so we're supposed to believe. *Cough*

STACI MILLER:: because of what he’d been through and was forced to become a brave, selfless man,

Ocean Elf: Those adjectives are not what comes to mind for me when it comes to Harry Potter. reckless and self-absorbed is more like it.

STACI MILLER:: there was absolutely no good reason to keep lying to him. Sure, Dumbledore admitted he’d handled this badly, but there’s not really an excuse for that when it was Harry’s life being lied about.

Ocean Elf: Well, honesty isn't exactly a strong point for most of these characters in the first place. Everybody seems to lie about something at some point. But yeah, Dumbledore had tons of dirty little secrets.

STACI MILLER:: 13He Was In With Grindelwald

Ocean Elf: Exactly!

STACI MILLER:: Do people really change their spots that much? Dumbledore was literally hanging around, being best friends with the darkest wizard to ever grace the world, aside from Voldemort and maybe Salazar Slytherin himself. He says himself it was because he was blinded, but Dumbledore’s a clever guy – how blinded could he have been, really? He was willing to pal around with Grindelwald for as long as it suited him, until the duel that killed his sister. It took the actual death of his sister to realize that Grindelwald might not be a good guy after all.

Ocean Elf: Yeah, that really doesn't add up. How in the world did he manage to become schoolmaster again? And this wasn't even something added into a movie adaptation like what was done in the 2003 Grinch movie, where the biggest school bully ended up being the mayor of Whoville, something never mentioned in the original poem/story. But in HP's case, all this comes out in the actual books, Dumbledore was way into the dark side, and then he got to be schoolmaster. Oy. Maybe there weren't any other "pureblooded wizards" up for the job at the time, and well they sure couldn't have a *gasp* mudblood" in that position now could they?

STACI MILLER:: It seems harsh not to give him a second chance, but he was friends with Grindelwald while being fully aware of what he wanted to do. Come on, man.

Ocean Elf: Exactly.

STACI MILLER: 12…And Really Believed Some Of Those Ideals

Ocean Elf: Yep again.

STACI MILLER:: More than that – J.K. Rowling showed us exchanges between Dumbledore and Grindelwald that make it hard to believe he only loved Grindelwald and didn’t agree with the ideals he espoused. He truly thought that magical people were better than non-magical people. That was something he actually thought, and it’s hard to believe that only Grindelwald persuaded him to think this, because that’s a pretty big deal. Sure, he wasn’t quite on a level of wanting to massacre every Muggle and Muggle-born in sight like Voldemort was, but his morals definitely weren’t as high and mighty as he tries to portray them to be by the time he’s around Harry. 'Magic is might' is nothing short of prejudice and discrimination, and Dumbledore once took his part in that. Ew.

Ocean Elf: Which is the only way it even makes sense for him to have "loved" or even been friends with Grindel in the first place.

STACI MILLER:: 11He Handled Harry’s Pseudo-Possession Poorly

Not only did he lie to Harry – he actively kept him in the dark when Harry might have been starting to catch on because he was literally being possessed by Lord Voldemort. Well, kind of. Voldemort was edging his way into Harry’s head and pretty much making him crazy. He was influencing Harry’s emotions to be more like his own, making him angry and spiteful, turning his entire world dark – and how did Dumbledore handle this? By ignoring Harry and letting him spiral because he was worried Voldemort would try and get to him through Harry.

Ocean Elf: I could never figure out why the big wig wizards couldn't have taken out Voldy long before that point. Never liked the whole soul-stealing/horcrux crap anyway.

STACI MILLER:: This was seriously selfish AF.

Ocean Elf: That would explain why Harry and Dumbledore had such a secretly close affinity, both were selfish when it comes down to it.

STACI MILLER:: Dumbledore might try and say he had Harry’s best intentions at heart, but considering how broken and angsty Harry was in book five, I’m not convinced.

Ocean Elf: That was one of the books I didn't read. So I'll take your word for it. I think Harry would've been angsty anyway, but whatever. I thought the end to book 4 really stunk.

STACI MILLER: 10He Was Responsible For Sirius’ Death

Not only did he ruin Harry’s life, he ruined Sirius’. He ruined Sirius in the worst way possible, and was definitely responsible for Sirius’ death.

Look. Harry might blame himself for this one because Sirius was rushing to save him, but what was Dumbledore thinking when he made Sirius stay in the home that he was neglected in and probably abused in for his entire childhood? The Black family were not good people. They were insane blood supremacists. Sirius ended up being murdered by his own cousin. And yet, here’s Dumbledore, thinking it’s okay to lock him up in that house 24/7. Did he seriously believe that it wouldn't drive him to do anything rash or self-destructive? Do you know Sirius, Dumbledore?!

Sirius, was notorious for being impulsive and passionate. Thanks, Dumbledore.

Ocean Elf: So, that abusive house, and then the prison where the dementors were. Ugh.

STACI MILLER:: 9He Let The House-Elf Enslavement Continue

Ocean Elf: No kidding!

The thing is, you don't find all of this crud out within the first book. It all spins out across the span of several of them, so that someone like me is left wondering "Who the heck are these people?" So Hogwarts saved Harry from the Dursleys for several months of the year, only to be found out as running a slave racket by the fourth book. As if the stupid "muggle/mudblood" stuff wasn't already bad enough.

STACI MILLER: Wow. Dumbledore offered to pay the house-elves a tiny amount for their service and give them bare minimum work vacations – therefore, he’s a saint, right?

Ocean Elf: *Derisive snicker*

STACI MILLER: No. The house-elves were still slaves and Dumbledore was doing very little to try and change that.

Ocean Elf: As head of that school, he could have put a stop to it with a word, and he didn't.

STACI MILLER: You’re the headmaster of a magic school. Magic doesn’t allow food to be brought from thin air. I know, this is canon –

Ocean Elf: I gave up trying to figure out the ins and outs of HP magic dos and don'ts long ago. I can't even keep all the creatures straight.

STACI MILLER: but is Dumbledore trying to say it couldn’t have been used for food preparation or cleaning? Or that a school with that much money couldn’t have paid the house-elves a living wage or employed actual people?

Ocean Elf: Since the house elves were already there, it would make the most sense to employ them. Or better still, maybe there shouldn't have been such thing to start with. I mean really, what was the point?

STACI MILLER: Sure, the house-elves would have refused, initially –

Ocean Elf: Yes, out of fear, or maybe complacency, weak-mindedness, they were very poor excuses for elves anyway, IMO.

STACI MILLER: but Dumbledore wasn’t willing to try very hard to change the slave culture surrounding them. Clearly he had more important things to worry about, like lying to Harry…

Ocean Elf: Exactly.

STACI MILLER: I can hear Dumbledore's excuses already. He would probably say that Harry was only safe under the roof of a blood relative... that they were his only blood relatives left.

Ocean Elf: Which just doesn't wash, since anybody can be cruel regardless of blood.

STACI MILLER: The thing is, though, he wasn’t safe. Not by any stretch of the imagination. He was neglected and abused until he left that house, and for the first 11 years of his life, he felt completely strange and unwanted.

Ocean Elf: Which I'm pretty sure was done by design to make him a more sympathetic character, and make Hogwarts look good by comparison.

That only goes so far. Turns out the wizarding world is full of Dursleys too, they just don't necessarily make little kids sleep in a closet or under the bed or in a trunk or whatever Harry's pathetic situation was.

STACI MILLER: That’s damaging to any kid,

Ocean Elf: Definitely.

STACI MILLER: and Dumbledore is lucky Harry turned out as selfless as he did, or all of his plans to defeat Voldemort would have been dashed.

Ocean Elf: Erm...Uh, not quite. More like Harry just didn't figure out he was being used. Not that he was exactly innocent of doing likewise.

STACI MILLER:: Anyway. Sure, Voldemort couldn’t hurt him under their roof, but Harry went wandering off on his own so many times because he hated that house, and Voldemort could have easily snatched him off the street at some point. The only thing putting Harry did was keeping order in the magical world -- it literally had nothing to do with Harry's own wellbeing.

Ocean Elf: That's another thing I don't get. The Dursleys were absolute dunces. Voldy didn't live by any code of ethics, so could've destroyed the Dursley house in a lightning bolt. But again, maybe this is some HP magic canon thing. And this is right on about the whole agenda being about keeping order in the wizarding world.

STACI MILLER: 7He Didn’t Protect Harry From The Triwizard Tournament

I want to know what Dumbledore was thinking when he decided to let the Triwizard Tournament run its course and let Harry compete, rather than pulling him out immediately. It was clear that Harry didn’t enter himself. It couldn’t have been more obvious—even in the beginning—that there was some serious dark magic at play. Like, literally, this has *never* happened before in the history of Hogwarts, so what the hex was he thinking? Dumbledore is supposed to be hella smart and know tons about magic (both dark and good). And what does Dumbledore do? Shrug and sit back, almost as if he’s too curious to see what will happen to actually bother protecting Harry.

Nice. This really showed us who actually cared about Harry, Dumbledore. Look at how this one turned out in the end.

Ocean Elf: Cedric Diggory gets murdered. Hogwarts should've had the pants sued off them for that. This was almost Hunger Games territory.

STACI MILLER: 6He Lets Dangerous Things Happen At Hogwarts

Ocean Elf: Yes. Like a dangerous tournament where students can and in one case for sure, did get killed.

STACI MILLER: Dumbledore doesn’t seem to give a crap that his school is overrun by dangerous things.

Ocean Elf: That is for sure. Those weird creatures Hagrid was in charge of. Those weird plant/baby type things that could kill you with their cry, in some magic class, all sorts of bizarre things. Even that devil weed stuff in book 1.

STACI MILLER: It’s right next to the Forbidden Forest, which is known for werewolves and other dangerous creatures that could kill someone –

Ocean Elf: *Cough* Vampires. And I seem to remember some enormous spiders, too.

STACI MILLER: and yet, at no point ever does he attempt to clear out the forest. In fact, he actually lets a detention happen IN it... at night. Um, what?! And this isn’t all. Hogwarts repeatedly proves itself to be an excessively dangerous place, with Dumbledore doing absolutely nothing to protect the students. At one point, there are Dementors around it. Yes, he’s furious, but he doesn’t seem to have argued against it particularly hard… And all of this combined makes it seem like Dumbledore doesn’t really care too much for the welfare of his students.

Ocean Elf: I can't even remember whose idea it was to bring the Dementors to the school I actually thought it was Dumbledore's. Shows how good my memory is for some specifics of a series that left me cold after the fourth book, and I only read the7th to find out how it all ended.

And it was great to have it all end, except now it's come back, with the dreaded "Fantastic Beasts". Argh.

STACI MILLER: 5He Employed Snape And Refused To Hear Anything Bad About Him

Okay, okay, okay. I know. Snape turned out to be a ‘good’ guy in the end.

Ocean Elf: Good only in the sense that he was not working for Voldemort and was actually opposing him - I think.

STACI MILLER: He actually killed Dumbledore on Dumbledore’s orders,

Ocean Elf: *Cringe* Now this is the kind of thing that I just plain don't like. This was supposed to be a school, with characters there on a daily basis. And here was a teacher killing the headmaster on his orders just to give Voldy no chance at poing it himself. No, I would not rather have Voldy kill Dumbledore or anyone else. And I do blame stupid Voldy for that whole situation. By forcing those two into that kind of a sick situation, Voldy still had a little bit of victory in his defeat. Messed up... Disturbing... And just flat out unsatisfactory.

STACI MILLER: and he was in love with Harry’s mother Lily the whole time. I know.

Ocean Elf: And that really, *REALLY* sucked! How anticlimactic can you get? Snape was such a jerk because he couldn't get over a girl...

STACI MILLER: But he was still a terrible, abusive teacher. He crushed Neville’s confidence repeatedly. He made fun of Hermione for being smart. He unfairly picked on Harry for reasons we didn’t find out until book seven.

Ocean Elf: Those reasons being... Lily... *GONG!* Stupid!

STACI MILLER: And yet, he was fine to his own students in Slytherin, even favoring them often.

Ocean Elf: Which just goes to show he was what I've always thought of him, a snake/ape combo.

STACI MILLER: You can argue that Snape was a good guy, even a hero (bleh),

Ocean Elf: Bleh indeed. I sure can't argue for that idea.

STACI MILLER: but you can’t argue that he was a good teacher. He was absolutely terrible, and to let him teach in Hogwarts for all those years knowing just how spiteful he could be was nothing short of unforgivable.

Ocean Elf: Agreed. This was shady and shoddy.

STACI MILLER: 4Kids Figure Out Stuff Before He Does

For someone so clever, why does he seem to be so ignorant to things?

It goes back to Dumbledore seeming to be more curious about how things will play out than actually willing to protect his students. People figure out things before him all the time – most notably and embarrassingly, when Harry, Ron, and Hermione discovered the Sorcerer’s Stone was in danger before he did. They were wrong about who it was in danger from, but they still knew something was up and got to it moments before Dumbledore himself did.

Ron and Hermione were 12 at this point and Harry was 11. Two of them had been part of the magical world for less than a year. And yet, they were all more tuned into things in Hogwarts than its headmaster? Seems suspicious…

3He Kept The Sorcerer’s Stone In A SCHOOL

Speaking of which, why did he decide to keep the stone in the school in the first place? This just seems like a bad place for it. Hogwarts may be the safest place in the Wizarding World, but it’s also one where the entirety of Britain’s magical youth resides for most of the year.

At no point did Dumbledore stop and think, “Hey, maybe I’m endangering them by keeping the thing Voldemort wants most below the lake”?

At this point, it really is as if he wants to see how things will unfold if he mixes them up a bit and throws in some drama — which is a dangerous attitude to have for anyone, let alone someone with so much power. What was he thinking half the time?

Ocean Elf: Yeah, did he really think Voldy would have the scruples not to attack a school or anyone in it to get some uber powerful magic item? Safe for the stone? Not so much. Safe for the students? Not a chance.

STACI MILLER: 2He Didn’t Recognize That Alastor Moody Wasn’t Alastor Moody

Ocean Elf: I didn't understand that either. In various online role-plays I've participated or just looked on, magic people usually had ways of detecting any hocus pokus that was a bit off, and who was behind it.

STACI MILLER: We’re told Alastor “Mad-Eye” Moody and Dumbledore were old friends. Mad-Eye Moody was a well-respected Auror (dark wizard catcher) before he retired, and Dumbledore was also a champion against dark wizards – snort. For the later part of his life, anyway. So it did make sense that he’d hire him to teach Defense Against The Dark Arts at his school.

But how did he not realize that he wasn’t actually Moody? He even managed to get Harry away from him when it became apparent someone in the school was working for Voldemort.

Really, Dumbledore? You need to pay more attention. WTF are you even doing?

1He Kept The Elder Wand

When Harry gets the Elder Wand, he does the right thing. To prevent more bloodshed and more people who are desperate to get their hands on it, he snaps it. Good on you, Harry! Someone had to do it.

But why didn’t Dumbledore?

Because of Dumbledore, Voldemort ended up with his hands on it. It all worked out in the end, but Dumbledore couldn’t have known it would come to that for all the decades that he held onto that wand. He would have done so many people a favor in the past if he’d had the guts to snap it; but he didn’t because on some level, he wanted the power.

This goes back to him once having the ideology that magic trumps all else. You were shady, Dumbledore. You were shady at best.

Ocean Elf: Here, here!

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Harry Potter: 20 Most WTF Things Dumbledore Has Ever Done

By Lauren Wethers 06.13.2017

Professor Albus Dumbledore is the ‘wise old mentor’ of the Harry Potter series. He’s the one who guides Harry through the trials of being the Chosen One, helps him to understand the world around him, and ultimately sends him on the quest that would help to defeat Voldemort once and for all. He’s beloved both by characters in the Harry Potter world and by the series’ devoted readers.

However, Dumbledore also made a lot of messed up decisions over the years. Some of them were silly, but others put a lot of innocent people in danger.

From silly off-the-cuff moments to bigger, more life-threatening moments, there were many points throughout the series where Dumbledore’s logic seems to fall apart if you think about it too hard. (Especially when it came to decisions about running a school for underage children.) Similar to the way that Harry discovered his beloved mentor wasn’t perfect, readers are slowly starting to figure out that some of Dumbledore’s decisions can only be described with a solid, “Wait, WTF?”

Here are 20 Most WTF Things Dumbledore Has Ever Done.

20. NITWIT, BLUBBER, ODDMENT, TWEAK

Of course, we have to start off with the original ‘WTF’ moment from Professor Dumbledore. By the time Harry arrives at Hogwarts for the first time in Sorcerer’s Stone, he and the readers have already learned about Dumbledore from other characters. Hagrid is in awe, of course, and Harry sees Dumbledore’s Chocolate Frog card on the train. But he doesn’t actually see him in person until he arrives in the Great Hall with the rest of the first year students for the Sorting Ceremony.

McGonagall is the professor who runs the Sorting, so Dumbledore doesn’t actually say anything to welcome the new students until they’re all seated with their new houses. By way of welcome, he rises to say, “Nitwit! Blubber! Oddment! Tweak!” It doesn’t make any sense, and it’s not supposed to. It kicks off the whimsical nature of both the books and of Dumbledore himself. However, his later “Huh?!” moments would take a bit of a darker turn.

Ocean Elf: Wow. I completely forgot about that. Probably because it really didn't make any sense beyond him just insulting the entire school. Nice going, Dumbledore.

Lauren Wethers: 19. NOT REMOVING THE JINX ON THE DADA POSITION

For the first few Harry Potter books, it seemed like the new Defense Against the Dark Arts professor each year was a running joke.

Ocean Elf: No kidding. Quirrel, who was actually working for Voldy, and Snape, who was just disagreeable and stupid. Or, at least, that's who I think ran that class. Then there was that fake Moody. I don't remember what his reall identity was. Also working for Voldy. They sure didn't vet or screen their staff too well over there.

Lauren Wethers: Although Hogwarts students (and readers) joked that the position was cursed, we didn’t actually get confirmation of that until Half-Blood Prince. In one of the Pensieve memories Harry witnesses, we learn that Tom Riddle jinxed the position because Dumbledore wouldn’t allow him to apply for it. Ever since then, no one has been able to stay in the job for more than a year.

Ocean Elf: Voldy again.

Lauren Wethers: However, this begs the question — if Dumbledore knew that the position was cursed, and whoever he hired would be out of a job or dead by the end of the year…why not remove the jinx?

Ocean Elf: No kidding! That could've been done. But it was all set up to imply that Voldy was so much more powerful than everyone else put together or something.

Lauren Wethers: Dumbledore is the most powerful wizard to ever live. One would think that his natural prowess combined with the Elder Wand would allow him to remove the magic that put potential professors in harm’s way. So why did he allow so many to cycle through the job for decades?

Ocean Elf: Great question. For that matter, if he was so powerful, he could've taken out Voldy without anyone else's help, and then maybe an entirely different and more interesting story could've started.

But since he was besties with Grindel in the past, both having these screwed up wants for power, maybe that never really went away after Albus's sister was killed. Maybe Dumbledor was letting these teachers in there under the ridiculous jinx as a way of weeding out potential future competition for power. But that's just my theory. *Snicker*

Lauren Wethers: 18. PLACING MULTIPLE DEATH TRAPS ON THE THIRD FLOOR OF A SCHOOL

Ocean Elf: No-brainer, that was totally irresponsible, to put it nicely. Not sure what to call that, depraved indifference to human life, or child endangerment, but something really bad. Something that would be a total career-finisher with jail time in the real world.

Lauren Wethers: Imagine this. You’re a parent about to send your eleven-year-old child off to boarding school for the first time. You get their school supply list, their required reading, and a notice that if your son or daughter sets foot in the third floor corridor, they’ll meet a painful death.

Ocean Elf: Uh, what? - Yeah, something's definitely wrong with that picture.

Lauren Wethers: What the hex?

Ocean Elf: Indeed!

Lauren Wethers: In the first book, Dumbledore keeps the Sorcerer’s Stone at Hogwarts because that was ostensibly the safest place for it to be. However, it was definitely not safe for the underage minors who had to go to school there. Kids do stupid things; that’s just part of growing up. In this situation, if you tell them not to do something, they’ll probably do it anyway, just because it’s forbidden. (Harry, Ron, and Hermione certainly ignored the orders to stay away.) It’s mind-blowing that the headmaster of a school would put all of his pupils in danger like that.

Ocean Elf: Yeah, only an idiot thinks kids aren't going to try to break the rules.

Lauren Wethers: 17. ONLY USING NAMES OF CANDIES AS THE PASSWORDS TO HIS OFFICE

Fitting with the lighthearted tone of the first three Harry Potter books, at first, Dumbledore is characterized as the wise, whimsical old man. He says silly things at speeches! He eats earwax Bertie Botts beans!

Ocean Elf: Oh, the anything jellybeans, I think those are the kind where you don't know what you're getting until you eat them. And the gross flavours mentioned. Ugh!

Lauren Wethers: He…uses the names of candies as passwords to his office?

Harry first learns the password to Dumbledore’s office when McGonagall hauls him there in his second year, after he literally trips over the body of Justin Finch-Fletchley. At that point in time, the password was “Sherbet Lemon.” Later, Dumbledore explains to Harry that sherbet lemon (or lemon drops, for Americans) is his favorite candy.

Apparently, he never changes the theme of his passwords. When an angry Harry tries to access Dumbledore’s office in Goblet of Fire, he cycles through all the names of candies he can think of to get the gargoyle to let him in. One of them — “Cockroach Cluster” — actually works. You’d think with all the expensive trinkets and important information Dumbledore keeps in his office, he’d think of some stronger passwords.

Ocean Elf: Hmm. Cockroach Cluster seems to break with the pattern. I actually don't remember so much of that minutia throughout the series.

Lauren Wethers: 16. KEEPING THE WHOMPING WILLOW AFTER LUPIN GRADUATED

When you have a child werewolf attending your school, it makes sense to ensure that no other curious students will follow him to their demise. And so the Whomping Willow was planted on the Hogwarts grounds to protect the entrance to Remus’ secret passage to the Shrieking Shack. It served its purpose — between the violent tree and the haunted house rumors, no one wanted to get close to where Remus went to transform.

However, after he graduated from Hogwarts, it’s hard to see why you would keep a murderous tree on school grounds. It no longer served a purpose other than potentially taking out a student’s eye, so why not remove it?

Ocean Elf: WTH? I don't know what's more dangerous, a werewolf or that poor excuse of protection. You could get killed either way.

Lauren Wethers: In all likelihood, he probably didn’t care enough to do anything about it – but that’s not exactly a point in his favor. If you’re going to run a school for children, you should maybe pay attention to magical objects that are specifically meant to harm them.

Ocean Elf: No kidding, and not have them on the property. Also, not admit werewolves as students if they are so dangerous. That's not discrimination, that's practical.

Lauren Wethers: 15. LETTING GRYFFINDOR WIN THE HOUSE CUP EVERY YEAR

Ocean Elf: Yeah, that really got cliche and boring.

Lauren Wethers: Most readers wanted Harry and his friends to win the House Cup for their accomplishments. However, the way Dumbledore lets them win makes it seem like blatant favoritism. (Hint — because it kind of is.)

Think about it. Harry was in the hospital wing days before the end-of-year banquet. Instead of awarding Gryffindor their well-earned points before the banquet, Dumbledore waits to suddenly award them points while Slytherin is celebrating their win. It’s great for the Gryffindors, but kind of a messed up thing to do to the other houses. What, there weren’t any Hufflepuffs who had committed some random acts of kindness worthy of a last minute ten points?

It makes us wonder what the other houses thought of Dumbledore’s constant intervening. “Don’t bother trying to win the House Cup this year. Professor Dumbledore will give it to Potter, anyway.”

14. DID YOU PUT YOUR NAME IN THE GOBLET OF FIRE?!?

This WTF moment from the Goblet of Fire movie still has fans talking nearly twelve years after the film’s release. In the book, Dumbledore is still very much the ‘wise and whimsical’ authority figure. When Harry’s name comes out of the Goblet of Fire, he doesn’t blame him or jump to conclusions. Instead, he calmly asks him if he put his name in the goblet or not. Key word — calmly.

So when the scene played out on screens, fans were shocked when Dumbledore came galloping into the room, yelled a question at Harry, and practically shoved him into the wall. What happened to just asking a simple question?

13. NOT CLOSING THE SCHOOL WITH A BASILISK ON THE LOOSE

Ocean Elf: Yeah, that was messed up and stupid. Since Dumbledore the all powerful wizard must've known what basilisks were and how dangerous they could be, he should've closed the school.

Lauren Wethers: Since Muggle schools close for bad weather, it seems difficult to imagine a school that stays open when multiple kids have near-death experiences. But Hogwarts does stay open throughout Chamber of Secrets, despite the fact that a murderous basilisk is slithering through the school’s plumbing.

Ocean Elf: And Hogwarts holds tournaments where participants get killed, too. Definitely not a school I'd send any kid to.

Lauren Wethers: Just a normal day at Hogwarts, nothing to see here.

Ocean Elf: Lol!

Lauren Wethers: In a flashback provided by Riddle’s diary, we can see that the previous headmaster, Armando Dippet, was on the verge of closing the school to keep children safe. Learning this was what led Riddle to frame Hagrid for Moaning Myrtle’s death, since the last thing Riddle wanted was to leave Hogwarts. Dumbledore, on the other hand, leaves the school open for the entire year. By the time Harry and Ron descend into the Chamber to save Ginny, it’s nearly time for exams. We know Dumbledore wanted Harry to strengthen his ‘saving people’ abilities, but he put other students’ lives in danger in the process.

Ocean Elf: Yes, and Voldy was responsible for that, too.

Lauren Wethers: 12. LEAVING INFANT HARRY ON THE DURSLEYS’ DOORSTEP

Ocean Elf: Yes. That was incredibly stupid, for so many reasons.

Lauren Wethers: At first, it seemed ridiculous that Harry had to live with the Dursleys. After he rid the Wizarding World of Voldemort, it would have been almost too easy to find a family willing to take him in. Can you imagine how quickly people would line up to adopt the Boy Who Lived? But eventually, we learned that there was a reason Harry had to live with his relatives. Only by living with Lily Potter’s blood relative could the protection of her love live on.

Ocean Elf: Which doesn't wash since Lily was already dead, and the Dursleys were anything but loving.

Lauren Wethers: Okay. That’s all well and good. But Dumbledore didn’t have to leave an infant on a doorstep.

In the first chapter of the entire series, Dumbledore brings the Boy Who Lived to his new guardians. Voldemort barely disappeared twenty-four hours ago, and Harry is only a year old. He’s arguably the most important infant in all of magical Britain. And instead of…knocking on the door or making sure that someone takes this child inside, Dumbledore just leaves an infant on the doorstep.

Seriously, what the hex.

Ocean Elf: Yeah. What was Dumbledore afraid of? It's as if he knew these people were bad news. A decent family, he shouldn't've had any problem approaching in person to discuss adoption of the child.

The only time the baby on the doorstep works is in the episode of The Flintstones with baby Bam-Bam's arrival. And Bam-Bam had something going for him that Harry Potter didn't, immense physical strength.

Lauren Wethers: 11. ONLY LEAVING A LETTER FOR PETUNIA DURSLEY

To continue Dumbledore’s series of bad decisions on November 1, 1981, he chooses not to explain the entire complicated situation to Petunia in person. He has some heavy news to share. Not only has her only sister been murdered, she is now expected to be guardian to another child for the next sixteen years. That’s a lot to take in for even the most saintly, kindhearted person. It would be respectful to take at least ten minutes to chat about this, right?

Not if you’re Albus Dumbledore. Then, you can just write a letter and call it a day.

Sometimes the small details get lost in his grand visions, but this is an awfully large detail to forget about. You’d think that a man who has also lost a sister would understand what painful news that must be to receive, regardless of how much the sisters may have argued. Putting that message in a letter is messed up.

10. HIRING GILDEROY LOCKHART

Gilderoy Lockhart, the DADA professor during Harry’s second year, is not exactly as wonderful as he’d like everyone to believe. Although his books about his many adventures made him into a bestselling author, he didn’t actually accomplish any of those feats himself. Instead, he extensively interviewed the people who did and then wiped their memories of the encounter. He fumbles the second anyone asks him a tough question, but people are willing to forgive a lot for a great smile.

Ocean Elf: Wow! I completely forgot about that character!

Lauren Wethers: However, as many people as Lockhart may have fooled, we’re willing to bet that Dumbledore wasn’t one of them. There is no way that he didn’t see through Lockhart’s bluster and know that he was lying. So why even bother hiring someone that’s so grossly incompetent? We know the job is jinxed, but that doesn’t mean ‘hire someone who will just stare at himself in the mirror the whole time.’

The only conclusion we can draw is that Dumbledore must have been thinking, “Oh, this will be hilarious.”

Ocean Elf: No crap.

Lauren Wethers: 9. NEVER STOPS SNAPE FROM VERBALLY ABUSING HIS STUDENTS

Ocean Elf: Of course, that question was nagging until the last book with the anticlimactic reveal about Snape and his achy-breaky heart. Awwwwwwww. Please.

Still, any good headmaster would disallow teachers to abuse their students, and clearly Dumbledore fell short.

Lauren Wethers: We’re given a reason for why Snape was so awful to Harry. Snape was in love with Lily, had been mercilessly bullied by James Potter, and Lily’s son happened to look exactly like his tormentor. When you add in years of being wracked with guilt over the death of the love of your life, you get a pretty unpleasant person. But if you’re going to teach in a school, you should maybe consider not terrorizing your students.

Ocean Elf: I really thought that whole little soap opera sucked from here to the next galaxy. Why vilify Harry's dead parents? Hadn't Voldy already done enough to them? All to make Snape into this sort of pathetic person who could've moved on with his life? And I saw the treatment of James and Lily as a vilification after the fact. It should've been left at they were innocent of bullying and treachery... Period. And Snape should've been given a different, more interesting reason for turning out to be the sour grape he was.

Lauren Wethers: Snape isn’t just nasty to Harry — he seems to have a vendetta against every student not sorted into Slytherin. He’s so bad that he’s Neville’s worst fear in third year. So why doesn’t Dumbledore step in and make him lay off of the students? It seems ridiculous to let a professor continue taking out his personal issues on children.

Ocean Elf: Agreed. So very much agreed.

Lauren Wethers: Granted, we’ve just established that this is the same headmaster who hired Lockhart, so another WTF moment it is.

Ocean Elf: It is all adding up to he really put the dumb in Dumbledore.

Lauren Wethers: 8. REQUIRING PARENTAL CONSENT FOR HOGSMEADE BUT NOT QUIDDITCH

Ocean Elf: Or the tournament that got Cedric Diggory killed in book 4. Hogsmeade? Like whoa, steer clear, kiddies! Tournaments that could lose your life? No problem!

Lauren Wethers: In Prisoner of Azkaban, one of the minor plot points is Harry’s desire to go to Hogsmeade. Uncle Vernon claims he’ll sign the permission slip after Aunt Marge’s visit if Harry behaves. Of course, that visit ends in Marge expanding into a balloon version of herself, so that permission slip was never signed. Without a guardian’s consent, Harry can’t go to the village. He’s stuck listening to Ron and Hermione’s stories until the twins give him the Marauder’s Map.

When you stop to think about it, though, it’s awfully ridiculous that this is the activity where students need a permission slip. They need permission to go to a safe wizarding village, but they don’t need permission to fly on broomsticks hundreds of feet above the air? Parents didn’t have to sign a consent form that demonstrated knowledge of a third floor death trap two years before? Dumbledore is running a weird school.

Ocean Elf: That's putting it mildly.

Lauren Wethers: 7. LOCKING SIRIUS IN THE HOUSE WHERE HE’D BEEN ABUSED FOR YEARS

Ocean Elf: Like what the...?

Lauren Wethers: To Harry, Grimmauld Place represents Sirius. It’s the place his godfather called home, and a house Harry returns to at the beginning of his quest to find Voldemort’s Horcruxes. So it’s easy to forget that to Sirius himself, 12 Grimmauld Place meant a return to a place where he never felt loved.

Ocean Elf: I actually don't remember this, but it sounds mighty unpleasant, and not the first time Dumbledore stuck someone into a place where they weren't loved.

Lauren Wethers: Sirius was the black sheep (black dog?) of his Slytherin pureblood family, and his mother never let him forget it. He was already depressed throughout the fifth book because he wasn’t allowed to go out and contribute to the fight. Being cooped up in a house that held so many painful memories didn’t exactly help.

Ocean Elf: I only read books 1/4. I thought he died in the fourth book, but I must be mistaken. Must've heard about rather than actually read about his death.

Lauren Wethers: This is probably another instance where Dumbledore was so busy with the big plan that he forgot about what seemed to be a small detail. However, his pent-up emotions made Sirius’ last days miserable. His story already ended in tragedy, and it doesn’t help that he couldn’t enjoy the last few months of his life.

Ocean Elf: Ugh! *Scowl* That kind of thing really ticks me off!

Lauren Wethers: 6. ALLOWING THE FORBIDDEN FOREST TO BE USED AS A DETENTION LOCATION

Ocean Elf: Yeah. Really dumb move...

Lauren Wethers: The Forbidden Forest is completely off-limits. Unless, of course, you need to send some eleven-year-olds in there for detention. Then you can go ahead.

Ocean Elf: *Snicker*

Lauren Wethers: The punishment really doesn’t seem to fit the crime, either. Harry, Hermione, Neville and Draco were all caught out of bed after hours. A furious McGonagall deducts fifty points from each student before giving them detention. And for detention, the four students are sent out of bed…after hours…into the forest where no students are allowed to set foot.

…Does this make sense to anyone else?

We don’t actually know who the specific person was that decided what the students would be doing in detention, but the fact that this is commonplace enough for no one to blink an eye means detentions like this probably happened before. The Hogwarts school board has some power, as we see in Book 2 — but Dumbledore is clearly not worried about parents suing for putting their children in mortal peril.

Ocean Elf: And that sure is clear as glass by the end of book 4.

Lauren Wethers: 5. EITHER DOESN’T KNOW OR CARE ABOUT VOLDEMORT ON THE BACK OF QUIRRELL’S HEAD

The biggest reveal of Sorcerer’s Stone is that it wasn’t Snape who was trying to steal the Stone — it was Quirrell. Not only that, but he had been playing host to Voldemort for the entire school year, providing the Dark Lord with a body as he tried to procure one of his own.

This presents us with two possibilities. Either Dumbledore had absolutely no idea that Voldemort was in Hogwarts the entire time…or he knew and just didn’t care. One possibility implies that Dumbledore’s powers of perception are maybe not up to Sherlock’s standards. The other would mean that he just let Voldemort roam around Hogwarts without doing anything…for the lulz? To see if an eleven-year-old child would figure it out and save the day? Neither option is very forgiving. If you stop and think about his potential motivations for too long, the story starts to fall apart.

Ocean Elf: Oh boy, does it ever!

Lauren Wethers: 4. ALLOWING HARRY TO SUFFER THE ABUSE FROM THE DURSLEYS

Ocean Elf: Yeah! Why? Just, why?

Lauren Wethers: Earlier, we mentioned that it was necessary for Harry to live with the Dursleys for the magic of Lily Potter’s love to live on. That’s an accepted fact, and not a situation that anyone, including Dumbledore, would be able to change. However, just because Harry had to live with his aunt and uncle doesn’t mean that he had to endure the constant abuse they dished out for ten years.

We know that Dumbledore had eyes on Harry as he grew up. The Dursleys’ neighbors, Mrs. Figg, is a Squib who works with Dumbledore. She had been sending him information about Harry as he grew up. Dumbledore might not have known the extent of the abuse, but he definitely knew Harry was being maltreated. Why would he allow adults to continue emotionally and physically abusing an innocent child? We’ll come back to that later, but we didn’t come up with any positive answers.

Ocean Elf: Because there simply aren't any. This was facilitation of child abuse at the least.

Lauren Wethers: 3. DIDN’T PREP HARRY FOR THE FACT THAT HE WOULD DIE

Ocean Elf: Didn't do anything to prevent it, either.

Lauren Wethers: Before the events of Half-Blood Prince begin to unfold, Dumbledore already knew that he was going to be dead before the end of the next year. He may not have been sure how — either from the curse placed on the ring or from Snape stepping in to finish the job — but he knew that his days were numbered.

Inexplicably, he doesn’t share this information with Harry, even though he knew that Harry had just lost a father figure quite recently.

Ocean Elf: How would telling Harry that Dumbledore was going to die help him? And why just Harry? If he was supposed to know, why not the rest of the student body as well?

Lauren Wethers: He didn’t have to let him in on the plan with Snape, if he wanted to keep his deal with Snape a secret. He could have simply told him the truth about the cursed Horcrux. That way, Harry could have begun to prepare emotionally, similar to the painful but necessary process you go through when a close family member is sick.

Instead, Harry is literally forced to watch Dumbledore die, without any guarantee of an explanation.

Ocean Elf: Ugh! Hearing the news about a death is one thing. Watching it? Oy...!

Lauren Wethers: 2. LETTING PEOPLE DIE SO HE WOULDN’T HAVE TO FIGHT GRINDELWALD

We learn the most about Dumbledore’s life in Deathly Hallows, when Harry starts uncovering pieces of information as he searches for first Horcruxes and then Hallows. One of the most shocking revelations was that he was friends with Gellert Grindelwald as a young man, and the two of them planned to search for and unite the Hallows. This friendship later took a turn for the worse as Grindelwald became more power-hungry, and when the two began to fight, Dumbledore’s sister Ariana got caught in the crossfire. Dumbledore didn’t face Grindelwald again until their legendary 1945 duel.

He didn’t confront Grindelwald out of fear of finding out who cast the spell that was fatal to Ariana. But in avoiding a confrontation, he also allowed countless numbers of innocent people to die while Grindelwald cemented his title as one of the most dangerous Dark wizards of all time. Dumbledore was obsessed with the greater good, but that obsession left him at a pretty crucial time.

Ocean Elf: Wow!

Lauren Wethers: 1. GROOMING HARRY FROM AGES 1 TO 17 TO DIE

Ocean Elf: Ugh! Excuse me, cringe attack.

Lauren Wethers: While some of the other items on our list were funnier ‘WTF’ moments, this one is far from funny. The series takes on a much darker turn when you consider the fact that Snape was right — Dumbledore raised Harry like a pig for slaughter.

Ocean Elf: Eww! *Recoiling*

Lauren Wethers: From the moment Harry sets foot in Hogwarts, it seems like almost everything is a test. Dumbledore gives him the Invisibility Cloak to see what he can achieve. He hangs back in situations to allow Harry to get himself into and out of danger repeatedly. But through all of this, he makes sure that he remains someone who Harry trusts. He does his job a bit too well — when Scrimgeour accuses Harry of being “Dumbledore’s man through and through,” Harry says defiantly that he is. He has difficulty thinking of his mentor as a fallible person, which makes the truth that much harder to swallow.

Ocean Elf: Ugh. Just - ugh!

Lauren Wethers: Dumbledore pulled strings throughout Harry’s Hogwarts years to make sure he’d be courageous and skilled enough to make it all the way to the end of the road, and then loving enough to die.

Ocean Elf: Eww, eww, eww!!

—

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