A Moving Whobilation

'Happy Whobilation' Bah Humbug! We Want Christmas Brought Back!

 

The 2003 Grinch movie had some problematic issues that require a response and in story form.

The movie mucked up a few things.

"Whobilation"? "Book Of Who"? The mayor was the biggest schoolyard bully? He and the Grinch fought over some girl? Oh, brother.

So, some of our characters are determined to get Whoville to straighten up and fly right once again.

The town of Whoville is in for a shocking awakening concerning the hideous truth behind "Whobilation", the Book Of Who" and the mayor's true colors.

This Grinch movie foefiction takes place before the Grinch tries to steal Christmas, but after our Lady Une burn story which was the Une foefiction that introduced the main character of this story, Indianna Mae Who.

--

A Moving Whobilation

 

It used to be called Christmas time in Whoville. Now it was called Whobilation..

Much as Indy Mae Who disliked it, as a reporter, she was expected to attend and cover various ceremonies honouring this fake occasion.

She and her fellow reporter Jennah Rae Who for the KWHO station's "Who's News", got there early enough, but only just. The ceremonies hadn't started yet, but from the looks of the crowd, it probably wouldn't be too long in coming.

Indy headed over to where the baked goods were once the ceremonies got underway and the food was on display and ready to be enjoyed by everyone.

She smiled as she approached. "Hi there, this stuff looks really delicious, is it for sale or strictly for the competitions?"

Erin, the baker, grinned at the girl. "Aye well lassie, some for sellin. Some for the competition" she winked at her and handed her a brownie and a paper cup of hot mint tea. "Im kinda new round here? Erin O'Whien be my name. Whas yours lass?"

Indy suddenly smiled brightly. erin was the sort of person she just couldn't help but like.

In addition to Erin's Scottish accent, she was fairly short, with hazel eyes, a snout on the slightly larger side, and radiant red hair, styled into the shape of a doughnut.

"I'm Indianna Mae-Lynn Who for the Whos' News. Welcome here, Erin. I hope you'll find this town to your liking." She took out some money to pay Erin for the brownie and tea.

"Aye I am holdin a contest lass. Come ta o it id best make the announcemet soon. Ya see I give each contestant a 4 lb block io this fudge an they whatever they can think of doncha know. I hope more then a few people enter!"

Indy smiled and nodded. "Good luck to you." With that, she continued on her way.

An announcement came over the microphone. "Whether you are celebrating either Christmas, or Whobilation, or both, welcome one and all to the festivities! I'm Jennah-Rae Who, your M.C for this evening."

"Way to go, Jennah!" Indy cheered.

Mayor augustus MayWho grimaced. He thought he had made it clear that it was Whobilation and not Christmas they were celebrating, especially after the massive restorations done to Whoville after Lady Une had caused so much damage. It wasn't Christmas that mattered, it was the fact Whoville and its citizens had survived.

Hearing Indy's encouragement, the woman continued with a slightly broader smile. "Our apologies for the delay in getting started, but now that we're all here, let's get on with it! For those of you new to our great little town, welcome, and we hope you enjoy the festivities as those of us who have been here our entire lives! Now, without further comment, let's begin!"

The first event was utterly lame according to Indy. A lighting of the Whobilation candle by the Whobilation Queen, whoever that was.

Indy stood silent as she let the camera roll. She had nothing enthusiastic or even nice to say about this event at all.

"Now," Jennah said once the first event was completed, "The reading from the Book of Who - "

Indy grimaced, trying for all she was worth not to mutter something close to profane under her breath, because if no one heard her, the microphone just might.

Jenna continued, "the section entitled "Everyone's Part" which, ironically is being read by one person, what is this, communism?" Jenna just couldn't resist. She disliked this Whobilation business and the silly Who-centric religion and its crazy book as much as Indy did.

This brought about some laughter from the people, a few loud guffaws, but mostly suppressed and nervous chuckles.

Indy was one of the loud laughers, but at this point, she didn't care.

Jenna continued, still spluttering, particularly since she could not recite this next bit in all seriousness. "I call on our - illustrious - Mayor Augustus Who," Jennah was not sure if she would be taken as either a complete fake or a mocker by this time, and could not keep a straight face to save her life. "to do the - " She choked out the last word, "honor."

Mayor MayWho stepped up and read from his favorite piece of literature, the so-called "Book of Who," which had inexplicably become popular since the Lady Une wreckage and Augustus's rise to power after that point. Though he read flawlessly, there was just something off-putting about him for a few of the Whos there. He seemed to take himself and this book too seriously.

When he was done, Jennah took back the mic. "Thank you, Mr. MayWho...Now, Chad Raoul Who will present the credit card max-out award, and announce tonight's competitions. Good luck, everyone, and have fun!"

"Thank you, Jennah." Chad said as he took the mic. "The Credit Card Max-Out award goes to..." There was a drum roll, and then Chad took the piece of paper with the winning name on it. "Martha May Whovier, for spending more on her light display than most people spend on presents!"

The crowd roared.

There were at least some Whos there who were less impressed.

"Spending more money on her lights than most spend on gifts?" Xanadu Who commented to Lily Blossom Who. "I hardly think that's something to be proud of let alone worth rewarding. Nothing against light displays, they're beautiful. Winter would be long and dull without them. but this whole thing is just so me-centric and competitive it's a parody of itself to the point of obscene."

"Yeah," Lily said in reply, "We teach children not to spend money on themselves, buy gifts for others because they'll get lots of gifts in turn."

Xanadu winced at Lily's logic. "Well, not exactly, we don't teach them to give just so they'll get. What I mean is this rewarding people for such extravagance just flies in the face of what Christmas is really all about, don't you think?" Xanadu too, disliked the change over from Christmas to Whobilation. Nevertheless, she and her family made the best of it.

"Uh whatever, I guess." Lily said indifferently.

Xanadu continued. "If you ask me, they ought to do away with the credit card max-out award altogether."

"Unless it's only given to people for spending the most on charity work or gifts for others," Lily added.

"But even then," Xanadu said, "that could still encourage people to be charitable for the wrong reasons, like self-glorification."

"That's true, but then again, if they're going to glorify themselves anyway, they might as well put that to good use and help someone else out."

"You've got a point." Xanadu said, shaking her head. Lily just wasn't really understanding what she was trying to say, but then, Lily never struck her as a very deep thinker.

For her part, Lily was all for Whobilation, or any excuse to have a holiday. She was mainly there, hoping to get close to Whobris, the mayor's sidekick, but until then, hanging out with Xanadu and her family was the next best thing.

The credit card max-out award was announced, presented, then it was on to the next item.

Chad continued on. "This evening's sports and competitions are as follows: Present Balancing; Candy Cane Licking, soda guzzling, and there is a special contest for the kiddies, which is the gingerbread construction. They are to attempt to make replicas of Whoville City Hall and the Mayor's House. Half the contestants will work on Whoville City Hall, the remaining contestants, the Mayor's house. There will be an announcement when time is up for all competitions, and the judging of each will occur at the conclusion of tonight's ceremonies. Those of you not entering in the competitions, just mingle and enjoy yourselves."

Erin O'Whoien giggled and jiggled, feeling the crowd's excitement. She glanced over at her staff of cookers and bakers and candy-stick woozle makers. Everyone was busy, carrying great, tall piles of confectionary trays on their arms, balancing them through years of experience. Big vats of chocolate were being stirred by still more Whos.

Suddenly, Jennah, approaching Indy, said, "Here, Indy, catch!" and a small bag of fudge flew past Indy, narrowly missing her head.

"Jennah, you brat!" Indy said as she bent down to pick up the bag. It was a good thing it had been stapled shut, and the fudge hadn't fallen out. "Thanks, but you need to practice a little more - and not on me." she grinned at Jennah.

They mingled more, and eventually Indy caught sight of the fairy, Capri Monroe, a friend of hers, and made her way over to say hi.

"Where's Ameh and the others?" Indy asked, noticing Capri seemed to be all by herself.

Ameh's around here somewhere, but the others went home. This Whobilation stuff is not everyone's cup of tea, no matter how much Augustus likes to pretend otherwise."

Indy smiled and nodded. "No kidding.

"We have winners in the soda drinking contest!" Chad's voice came over the mic. Then they were announced.

If there was anyone else Lily knew at the ceremony that night, she didn't acknowledge or seek them out. She only stuck with Xanadu, and kept an eye out for Whobris, who was apparently making himself scarce.

Even though it was Whobilation, Xanadu and family still enjoyed a few treats, and meeting up with other friends and relatives there, but she didn't think they would be staying too much longer.

When Xanadu was just finishing up a conversation with another friend, Lily tapped her on the shoulder.

Xanadu, I think I see Whobris over there, and the mayor isn't talking to him. Could you go over and put in a good word for me?"

What? To Whobris? Or the mayor?"

Lily made a horrible face. "Not that lard-o," she pointed rudely at Augustus, "I mean Whobris.

Appalled at Lily's shallowness and lack of manners, Xanadu frowned. But she didn't want to start a scene. "Why don't you just go over and try to talk to him yourself?"

Because you're an awesome speaker, and you could say all the right things to get him to notice me again."

Xanadu winced. Thanks for the compliment, but sorry, Lily, that's something I can't do. I'm not a match-maker. And we'll be leaving soon."

But I'd just bungle it, and then he would for sure have nothing to do with me." Lily whined.

Well, if he's that fickle, I'm not sure he's worth - "

Lily cut her off. "I never said he was fickle! It's just that he's always so busy with the mayor."

Okay, well, I still think you're the best one to speak to him if you want him to notice you. Please, take my word for it, I would feel unbelievably awkward walking up to Whobris and saying something like "My friend here would like to talk with you for a moment."

Even Lily couldn't help burst out laughing at this.

Their conversation got interrupted by Augustus MayWho taking another turn at the mic, to read something else from the 'Book of Who'. much to Indy's annoyance.

Deprived of her interviewee, Marilee went off in search of other victims, dragging her camera crew with her.

The passage being read was all about how wonderful it was to be a Who, and the things Whos stood for. The mayor added a personal touch at the end by saying a few words of his own that appeared to impress a good deal of the townspeople, but not everyone.

Capri scowled at him.

Ameh finally caught up with Capri and Indy. Noting their unimpressed expressions, she said "No kidding. I'm blowing this pop stand soon if I have to listen to much more of this.

Lily listened intently, taking it all in while Xanadu shifted uncomfortably next to her.

You know," Lily said to her friend, "I never was more proud of being a Who in this town until tonight."

Xanadu shook her head.

Lily continued. "It's just too bad our mayor is such a dough ball. I wish Whobris was reading instead.

Xanadu could barely suppress a choking sound. Was this girl for real? "Is that all that's bothering you about him? I don't care what he looks like."

Fine." Lily said, and moved sulkily away.

Xanadu sighed, then went to catch up with the rest of her family.

Marilee stopped to re-do her makeup, she took her small mirror out of her purse to examine her progress as she did it. Then, she sauntered up to Erin's table, and stood there, trying to decide what she wanted to get the mayor. "I think I'll have a 1 pound bag of that chocolate fudge." she said in her exaggerated cold official tone. "And some of those freshly baked brownies."

Marilee had finally managed to approach the mayor. She strutted up to him, flicking her hair back, then batting her eyelashes. "Sir, on this occasion I thought it only fitting to give you a little something for all the Whoville spirit you have shown, and for how much you've given of yourself to this community." She held out the bag of fudge, smiling her most censuous smile.

"Oh...how...lovely," the Mayor said, the fakest smile on his face. He took the bag from her and ate a small piece of the fudge - more for the crowd's sake than Marilee's.

"Thank you, I thought it was quite lovely as well," said Marilee as she smiled even brighter.

hahaha! Hey Marilee, can I have some fudge?" someone yelled out.

"Oh, not those losers again." Indy scowled. "Why do they have to show up everywhere and ruin everything?"

"Who are they?" asked Capri.

"The Wickersham brothers.

"What?" Capri's eyebrows raised. "I thought they were some kind of apes."

"They are… But they've been humanified. Since Mayor Augustus took over, those two have been fighting him for the whole town's attention." Indy said through clenched teeth.

Capri frowned. "There's something more than a little off with this picture. I'm going to have to make some repairs when the opportunity comes."

"Oh, okay that makes sense. Go for it, because this racket stinks." said Indy.

Capri flashed her a grin.

"Hey baby, come down here and let's have some of your 'fudge'!" the heckler continued.

Marilee's eyes glinted with a nasty look, but she tried to hide it for the camera's sake. She turned towards the sound of the jeering and shook her long, manicured finger at the offender. "Tsk, tsk, tsk....this fudge is for the Mayor," she scolded, trying to sound light and good-natured.

That's it, I've covered more than enough of this event, I'm out of here." said Indy irritably.

You're not the only one." said Capri. "I'm heading out too, as soon as I'm finished my snacks."

Later." said Indy, and she began moving off and out through the crowd.

But something was beginning to happen, something that would make this Whobilation celebration different from all the rest.

"Aw, c'mon, Marilee," the heckler continued. "I'll give you a 'merry christmas' - I mean, Whobilation."

Marilee noticed the spotlight was jiggling behind her and whirled around. Rick Frick, who was holding the portable light, was shaking with quiet laughter. Her eyes narrowed at him. "Shut up, you idiot!" she whispered, covering her mike so no one else could hear her.

At long last, the Wickersham brothers had been escorted out by security for being their usual repulsive bratty obnoxious attention-seeking selves.

Indy's exit was slowed considerably by having to wade through the throng, but she was rewarded with a front row position to witness the bratty brothers being ejected. She was all too happy to shoot the footage. Then, she turned off the camera and other equipment needed, and put it away. "Just because I shot it doesn't mean I'll give you morons your attention-fix and broadcast it. But just you wait. You never know where and when it might turn up." She said to herself once she was almost by herself at the entrance.

A moment later, Indy was startled out of her wits when Capri approached her, with Ameh in tow.

"That mayor of yours..." Capri growled. "And a lot of this town from what I saw tonight, needs a good slap upside the head."

Indy's eyes went wide. "Eh? You think so too?"

"He ruins people and he has the audacity to get up there pretending to be a model citizen of this town." Capri said curtly. "And they just follow whatever he says."

"I know. It's sickening. That whole Whobilation thing and his precious 'Book Of Who' - " and then Indy stopped short, something Capri said puzzling her. "What? He ruins people?"

"Yes." said Capri.

"You didn't see what he just did?" Ameh asked.

Other than reading from his infernal "Book Of Who" no."

He did a lot more as you were leaving, and I'll come to that." said Capri grimly.

"Who has he ruined? MarthaMay Whovier?" Indy asked. "He hasn't done something to her, I hope...It's no secret he's got it bad for her."

Not Martha," Capri clenched her fists. "Indy, you might as well know...It's the Grinch your mayor ruined...When they were both little kids. Then, and now."

"The Grinch?" Indy looked baffled. I didn't even know the Grinch was - still here. He was here one Christmas, but then I never saw or heard of him after that."

I'm sure the great illustrious one did his best to coerce as many people as he could into shunning him, even after that Christmas." said Capri.

"Was this all over Martha?" Indy asked.

"Nah, that's just the movie's embellishment. Gotta throw a silly love triangle in somewhere." Capri rolled her eyes. "The Grinch looks different, and augustus was and is still a bully."

Indy scowled. "This is really ticking me off." Her hands clenched.

"Mr. Grinch never got over the ridicule." Capri added.

"Nor has that ridicule from 'the illustrious one' gone away." Ameh hissed.

Indy was only starting to see that the Whobilation problem was just the tip of one ugly iceberg. What a disgrace, for a town that was supposed to be known for its warmth and hospitality, run by an overgrown school bully.

Capri touched Indy's hand, "Hold tight, I'll show you. This is a transport like the one I did to Lady Une's soldiers, you remember hearing about that?"

"Yeah!" Indy said, "Like, yikes."

"We're going back in time, not permanent like," Capri reassured Indy, "But what Augustus did to the Grinch, happened when they were both little."

Indy quivered, and within a moment, she felt Capri take a firmer hold on her.

It's okay, Indy. Ameh and NT and I do this all the time." Capri reassured her.

Then, the place seemed to fall out of view. For a moment there was utter darkness and a weightless feeling.

Indy took in a sharp breath.

Capri squeezed her hand a little to reassure her, and to help her steady herself.

Then, another place came into view, and Indy felt solid ground beneath her again.

It was a snow covered landscape outside, and Indy found herself in a house she'd seen on a town street before but had never been in.

"Don't worry, no one knows we're here." Ameh said to Indy. "They won't hear us talking either."

"Really? Cool." Indy breathed.

The door opened. A little boy shuffled into view in the doorway, a bag over his head.

"This was the Grinch, and the bag is because he was ashamed/embarrassed with his appearance." Ameh said darkly.

Indy's face flushed, and she quietly fumed between her friends.

The little Grinch held up the bag he was carrying. As he walked alone to school, he peeked inside the bag, and took out a parcel. TSoon, he arrived at the school, amid the chatter of other kids, most of them too busy to notice him, which he preferred.

But Augustus saw his favorite target and came over to show him up. He had also brought a gift for Martha, something he was not supposed to do. It had been a secret Santa, and Augustus was supposed to get a gift for the Grinch, while the Grinch had gotten Martha's name. But augustus was the one all stuck on that little girl, and couldn't stand the idea of the Grinch doing anything that might make him the least bit likeable to Martha. "You don't stand a chance with her. You're eight years old and you have a beard!" Augustus taunted.

Indy tsked and jabbed an unseen finger in his direction.

Capri narrowed her eyes.

"Class, quiet please." The teacher, Miss Rue Who's delicate but rather annoying voice said as they all filed in and took their seats.

"Man this feels weird, being in school at my age." Capri quipped.

Indy and Ameh snickered.

The lessons went by uneventfully, everyone fidgeting, anxious for the present exchange.

"All right class," the teacher said as the bell rang, "Christmas is about to begin!"

The children all exclaimed in pure excitement and joy and jumped up out of their seats. Even the Grinch leapt up.

The teacher laughed, and tried to establish some sort of order to the proceedings.

The scene went on with the exchange beginning. There were squeals of delight from excited kids who got what they really liked. And others who were more subdued because they weren't so happy with the things their friends had picked out.

Martha gave a present out to another girl, and Augustus had opened one from another boy. He soon started to pout a little as he noticed Martha wasn't coming to give him a present. And she didn't even seem to notice the one he was holding, waiting to give her.

The Grinch finally got up the nerve to approach Martha, once she wasn't occupied with the other girls around her. "Merry Christmas MarthaMay."

Before Martha could say a word, the minature future Mayor of Whoville started instantly laughing at the poor Grinch's present and inciting the others to join in.

"Aw, shadup!" Indy hissed.

Miss Rue had also noticed the Grinch seemed to be hiding his present and would not take the bag off his head. When she finally succeeded in getting him to give up the present and take the bag off his head, everyone saw that he had tried to cut his hair, and hadn't done a neat job of it, being only a little kid.

"Wow, look at that hack job!" Augustus laughed, and the other kids joined in.

"Demn!" said Indy.

Capri scowled next to her, and Ameh had her back turned on the whole scene.

By then, the Grinch was yelling and had grabbed his own present to hurl across the room. "Stupid present!" He exclaimed, and it hit a stack of gifts across the room.

Kids began yelling and screaming at his outburst of anger

Everyone backed up as he held up the tree above his head.

Indy's eyes went wide at that. "Holy crap!"

"Stupid tree!" He yelled in anguish as he threw it. Everyone scattered.

Indy could see in the small Grinch's eyes the rage and hurt that had been building up in him for so long. Tears came unbidden to her own eyes.

The little Grinch looked at the panic he had caused, at the tree that had destroyed the presents, at Martha's stunned and shocked look. He sighed in resignation and fled the room.

The next Indy saw was a brief scene of him packing up a few things. Then heading out of town.

"I hate Christmas!" his tortured scream hung in the air as he fled for the mountain. "I hate it!"

Indy hung her head and the few tears she started shedding had become a torrent of hot rage.

Capri's fists were balled up and she was scowling and biting her bottom lip.

The scene changed.

Darkness, the weightlessness, and once again, they were back in the abandoned building.

"I'm sorry this was so hard on you Indy," said Capri, offering her a tissue and putting an arm around her. "But now you know why I want that guy canned. He' started out wrong and hasn't changed."

"But you're right." Indy choked. "He's got no business pretending to be an example of Whoville spirit when he's capable of being so cruel."

"And he's never apologized or admitted to having done wrong, not from what I've managed to find out." said Capri.

"The thing is, that sort of thing didn't just happen at Christmas," said Ameh, "Augustus was a year-round ordeal, and the Grinch chose to run away at Christmas, no one actually ran him out of town. There were people who he could've turned to for support, and he didn't."

Indy nodded. "But what happened tonight?"

"The Grinch showed up - on a Wickersham dare. At least, that's how I understood it from the exchange. Augustus retaliated by giving him a 'present' - " Capri spat out the word, "probably something they all planned in advance." She scowled.

Do I want to know?" Indy grimaced.

"A giant razor, of all things." Capri growled.

Indy suddenly straightened up, trembling with outrage. "What - the - ruddy - freakin!? That does it, and it's gonna end, here, tonight!" She accidentally shoved Capri in haste and stormed back into the building.

Ameh and Capri looked at each other.

You figured this would rile her enough to send her into action, didn't you?" Ameh asked.

Capri nodded, a faint grin forming on her face. "And I'm going back in there to cheer her on."

Count me in." said Ameh.

The two fairies made their way back into the building.

Xanadu and family were utterly disgusted by the Wickersham/mayor stunt at the Grinch's expense, and they were leaving too, when suddenly a new voice was heard over the microphone, something in the tone inviting them to stick around.

"Whobilation." the voice sneered. "Really? What merit is there in celebrating being a Who?"

It was Indy.

The atmosphere in the room changed, becoming considerably tense. People hushed. Some stared and whispered. Others, who recognized the reporter were wondering if this was some kind of joke or if she was serious.

"Can anyone but the mayor answer me that?" Indy challenged. "What in the heck is so great about being a Who?"

Augustus, who had done his best to remain in fairly close proximity to the stage, got up on stage to approach Indy. "Have you gone mad?"

"No, sir, but this whole town must have in order to let this blasted Whobilation crud obliterate Christmas!"

The general sounds of nervous reactions throughout the crowd were heard.

"I'm still waiting for an answer!" Indy insisted. "What's so terribly special about being a Who that we had to make a holiday to glorify ourselves and our avarice?" And then, double down this iniquity by rubbing out Christmas?"

Xanadu applauded loudly, and started making her way toward the stage. Several people tried to caution her not to get involved, but she ignored them.

Elsewhere among the crowd, Capri and Ameh also made their way nearer to the front. They were going to show their support for Indy, and get into any action that might come out of this.

"We are not glorifying avarice." augustus retorted.

"It sure looks that way to me. Contests that involve such gluttony and waste. Sure, we all had fun and games and gifts at Christmas, and there's nothing wrong with that. But maxing out a credit card on lights? And all that ginger bread everybody used up today, trying to make the best replica of a certain house, who's going to eat it? Or is it just going to go stale and need to be tossed in the trash. Gift balancing, come on, all those beautiful wrapped boxes are empty. How many people could've used them to wrap real presents in to give to others they love, or to others in need of something pleasantly surprising to help them feel more worth while?"

"Now, Indianna, you must understand that - "

Augustus's patronizing speech was sharply cut off.

"Don't give me this 'Now Indy' stuff! *I* am talking, *you* are going to have to listen for once, now shut it!"

At this, there was a collective horrified gasp from the crowd. Indy just told the mayor to shut up, surely she was headed for the most trouble anyone could possibly land in.

There were a couple of loud clappers among the crowd.

The Grinch had seen the Wickershams being given the heave-ho, and he hadn't left yet. He was torn between trying to sabotage Whobilation or just clearing out, but then he caught wind of things not going well in the building. So, he stuck aroundd, but stayed hidden as much as possible to watch the fireworks. Indy's behavior surprised him as much as anyone, because he didn't believe there really was a single Who in town who really had the spine to go up against whatever the mayor wanted.

"You are in serious error, Miss Indy Mae." Augustus said, picking up the "Book Of Who" and leafing through the pages. "In the Book Of Who, it is clearly explained why we celebrate Whobilation and what it means to be a Who."

If he was expecting Indy to turn meek and apologetic, he was horribly mistaken.

Indy turned to glower at him, and she reached out, roughly snatching the book away. "ah yes, your ever so precious DEMN "Book Of Who!" she snarled, throwing the book as far as she could.

The crowd erupted in horrified gasps.

"How dare you!?" Augustus lost his cool and bellowed at Indy.

Indy was in full rant now, seeming to be oblivious to the reactions, and she only continued. "I don't know how people let themselves get conned into believing it was some ancient and sacred wonder! The blasted thing's only been around since Augustus MayWho became mayor - "

"Watch your language, Miss Indy!" Augustus admonished.

"after the blight on our town otherwise known as Lady Une!"

At this, more and more onlookers were experiencing a change, as their alarm at Indy's behaviour was slowly being replaced with a sense of realization. Had they really forgotten the time before Lady Une this much? How in the world was that possible?

"This so-called "Book Of Who" and the way it has been treated is as if it's some kind of Bible, and Who is a religion, of self-worship!"

"Being a Who is a wonderful thing." Augustus protested.

"Being a Who is not being a god!" Indy flung back.

Much to her surprise, and to Augustus's dismay, the crowd erupted into applause.

When it died down, she continued. "This "Book Of Who" is, from what I could tell, a series of cobbled-together quotes from other books combined perhaps with stuff Augustus and his pal Whobris plucked out of their own brains, but it, too, is only a copycat of other "books" of this or that. Was this supposed to rub out and replace the Book of Genesis, the Book Of Exodus, Deuteronomy, Numbers, all the books of the Old Testament, the gospels of Matthew, Mark, Luke, John, and all the books of the New Testament? After all, we used to read certain passages from those books at Christmas time, particularly from Matthew and Luke. Perhaps this "Book Of Who" is just a parody on the Book Of Mormon...?"

There was an unnerving, stunned silence from the crowd.

By this time, Augustus was beginning to look as guilty as a kid caught with his hand in a forbidden cookie jar.

Murmurs started. Indy couldn't make out what they were, but her friends among the crowd could. People were muttering how they simply hadn't even thought of that, and were wondering why they had remained blind to the concept for so long.

Indy continued. "Think about it. Once, there were "Books Of" and once there was Christmas. Now, we have the "Book Of Who" and Whobilation. And considering what a freaking bully you've been all your life, Mayor Augustus, including your nasty little razor thing tonight!" Indy flared at him, "You can take your demn "Book Of Who" and all its meaningless drivel, and take your *STUPID* Whobilation and stuff it all up your chimney! I want Christmas back!"

"You have some nerve!" Augustus roared, helpless to do anything about the crowd's agreement with Indy by way of thunderous applause and cheering. "I'll see you pay for this!"

Indy ignored him and said one last thing into the mic. "Apologies on behalf of this town to you, Mr. Grinch, wherever you may be, for the deplorable way you've been treated. And to everyone, merry Christmas!"

When she was through, Indy tore down the stage stairs, ran to where she had thrown the "Book Of Who" picked it up and then proceeded to furiously tear it to pieces.

And she soon had a lot of help.

Ameh was among the first to come up and help her, and then the book was being passed around and torn by all who got what was left of it.

Security refused to bow to the mayor's demands to have Indy thrown out. They agreed with what she had said. They, like so many others, had simply been too intimidated by the mayor to speak up before now.

Xanadu went up on stage and went to the piano. Then, she played and sang "Silent Night." There were more carols following.

Capri went around, quietly and sometimes using magic to change anything with a Whobilation theme to a Christmas one instead.

The mayor went home in a huff, but from that time on, Whobilation was largely abandoned by the citizens of Whoville, in favour of Christmas once again.

--

Back to Holiday Stories index