🧝‍♀️ 🤦🏽‍♀️

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True Boyfriend

🧝‍♀️ "Check mate!" Lol! (Referring to something written late on in the mangle.)

Many of these items are also included in these memes:

257 Things A Girl Wished A Guy Knew

Tips For Guys

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🧛‍♂️Meme1: True Boyfriend

🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: True creep trying to play Mr. Nice Guy.

🤦🏽‍♀️BP: More like True Stalker...

🤴Meme2: -Do This;

🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: hey you! Back off! I don't take orders from you!

🧛‍♂️Meme1: IF YOU DONT REPOST THIS, YOUR HIGH SCHOOL YEARS WILL BE THE WORST YEARS OF YOUR LIFE!

🤦🏽‍♀️BP: Hey, no need to shout! Besides, you have no control over any years of my life. So beat it.

🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: Ouch! Don't shout! I'm out of high school, and the worst years of my life concerned real events which chain mail had no part of.

🧛‍♂️Meme1: AND your next boyfriend/girlfriend will hate you.

🤦🏽‍♀️BP: Uh, if that person hates you, you wouldn't be in a relationship. So, what, is this person some kind of psyco who hates me so much he wants to be my boyfriend? Do you see how this doesn't work?

🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: Besides the fact that once a significant other hates you, they're no longer your boy or girlfriend, gaursh, that's some powerful chain email, what is it going to do, bore into the head and invade the mind of some future wanna-be bf of mine and completely program him to hate me if I don't pass it on? I've heard some stupid claims in chain mail, but this one really is laughable! ROTFLOL This is going to be funny!

🤴🧛‍♂️Memes: - •Give her

🧛‍♂️Meme1: a

🤴Meme2: your

🤴🧛‍♂️Memes: hoodie,

🧛‍♂️Meme1: of yours to wear

🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: Ewww! Who wants to wear somebody else's clothes!?

🤴Meme2: if she's cold.

🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: Aaaaaaaagh! As said in the Tips For Guys and 257 Things meme-mangles, girls should have enough sense to dress appropriately for the weather and shouldn't expect some guy to freeze his butt off just to show he wuvs her so fwippin' much even though she's stupid as all heck!

It's one of these utterly obnoxious chain letter rules for girls and guys, where every time a girl is cold or even pretends to be, he has to give her the shirt off his back and prove his undying love, no, make that worship of, and martyrdom to her. Aaaaaaagh! *Scowl* Hoodie, or jacket, the big thing is chain letter guys come in two types - jerks/psychos, and ridiculously sappy over-done nice guys who spend all their time enslaved to some demanding, clingy chick. The girls come in two stripes as well - the demanding "Give me your life or else I'll fall apart and haunt you forever!" and the girl who's always getting hurt/picked on/rejected. sometimes these meld into a nightmarish combination of them all. And girl or guy, none of these are known for their intelligence. They are hopelessly stuck on (imprinted if you will) on someone of the opposite gender, and they generally hate others of their own gender because they see them as a threat. Mary sue Gary stu! They all follow such silly cliche rules like the hoodie thing.

🧛‍♂️Meme1: so other people know she is yours.

🤦🏽‍♀️BP: So, uh...why do I have to wear some guy's clothes? Besides, I wouldn't want to unless it had been washed, actually looked like something I would wear, and wasn't meant as a "MINE!" label.

🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: And let's get something straight:

I belong to me and no one else, so any guy hoping to have any remote chance at a relationship with me's gonna know that right off the bat.

Sure, I'll wear his hoodie only on two conditions, 1. it's been washed, or never worn, and 2. if he'll wear one of my sweaters, fair's fair, after all!

🤴Meme2: •Give her a big t-shirt of yours to sleep in.

🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: *Facepalm* Ack! What do you expect him to do, go naked!? That's what would happen if he's expected to keep giving his clothes to this chick. Look, his clothes are his, hers are hers! Not once have I yet seen one of you chain creeps suggest she give up some item of clothing for him.

🤴🧛‍♂️Memes: - •Leave her

🧛‍♂️Meme1: sweet texts

🤴Meme2: cute messages.

🧛‍♂️Meme1: to wake up to.

🤦🏽‍♀️BP: Or creep me out...I don't buy flattery, so find someone else to sell it to.

🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: And make me suspicious, annoyed, or both. I don't go for the sweet nothings and don't require flattery. I don't do the text message thing at all and would get especially perturbed if some guy left me so-called "sweet texts/cute messages" that he didn't actually write himself because they are card-board cut-out virals AKA chain messages! Send me any of those and don't expect a thank you!

🤴🧛‍♂️Memes: - •Kiss her

🧛‍♂️Meme1: on the forehead.

🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: I prefer a handshake. Save kissing for family and affectionate little kids.

🤦🏽‍♀️BP: What is it with these forwards and people's foreheads? Sheesh!

🤴Meme2: in-front of all your friends....

🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: Bleck! Some of us girls are just not into PDA!

🤴🧛‍♂️Memes: - •Tell her

🧛‍♂️Meme1: shes

🤴Meme2: she looks

🤴🧛‍♂️Memes: beautiful,

🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: *Rolling eyes*

🧛‍♂️Meme1: not sexy.

🤦🏽‍♀️BP: Meh. Just a more PC way of sayin' the same thing.

🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: And get treated with the same unimpressed reaction as if you had said "sexy." I don't need or trust flattery and I'm not interested in turning you on. I don't care about being 'beautiful' unlike these chain ditzes and too many women in the media and the real world. Then when meme girls grow up and turn into women, they tend to go in a couple different directions too. The feminist who turns everything into a gender issue when she doesn't get her own way or just has her feelings hurt, and the gushing yet pontificating mother figure.

But where did these chain chicks come from? As in, what were they before they became such clingy Mary sues and over-done mother hens? Why, they were the ever so adorable chain letter children of course!

🧛‍♂️Meme1: - Tell her she has amazing eyes.

🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: And have them rolled at you. Gads!

🤦🏽‍♀️BP: Cliche!

🧛‍♂️Meme1: - When your friends walk by, say, "This is my girlfriend."

🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: And get blushed at and possibly clouted, and told to stop repeating yourself if I am your girlfriend, or get shoved and told to get the heck away from me if you're not!

🤦🏽‍♀️BP: What, EVERY TIME? That would get annoying! That would get you smacked upside the head and told to shut up.

🤴Meme2: •Look her in the eye when you talk to her.

🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: Ahem, generally, in North america, it's considered polite to look everyone in the eye when you're talking to them, girl or guy! I believe this may not be the case in all parts of the world, but the point is, the curtecy goes both ways.

🤴Meme2: •Let her mess with your hair.

🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: ugh! I know how annoying that is so won't mess with anyone's hair unless they like it or it's part of a scene to be acted out.

🤴Meme2: •Just walk around with her.

🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: Even if you or she has to be somewhere else?

🧛‍♂️Meme1: - When you walk with her, walk slowly.

🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: No, walk the way you normally walk, and don't slow me down if I'm in a hurry to get somewhere.

🤦🏽‍♀️BP: What if I'm in a hurry? I walk fast even when I'm not, so someone walking deliberately slow is just irritating!

🤴Meme2: •Forgive her mistakes!

🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: *Facepalm* Assuming he doesn't make mistakes of his own, it's just she who makes mistakes and needs to be forgiven, oh please! If he makes mistakes, where's the mandate for her to forgive those? Oh, right, in Chainland, he's always wrong anyway and she doesn't have to forgive anything! *Rolling eyes*

Newsflash: It goes both ways in the real world!

🤴Meme2: •Hold her hand when you're around your friends AND in private.

🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: Suppose they don't want to hold hands all the time…

🤴Meme2: •Let her fall asleep in your arms.

🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: Why? I mean, if a couple regularly falls asleep in each other's arms, fine and dandy, but meh, enough with the sap.

🤴Meme2: •Watch her favorite movie with her.

🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: Aaaagh! Covered in the Tips For Guys and the 257 Things chains!

🧛‍♂️Meme1: - Sneak

🤴Meme2: �Come

🤴🧛‍♂️Memes: up

🧛‍♂️Meme1: behind her.

🤴Meme2: and

🤴🧛‍♂️Memes: - Grab her by the waist.

🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: And get screamed at plus a wallop or anything from cds to a drink thrown at you, depending on what I might be holding at the time.

🤦🏽‍♀️BP: Aaaggh, don't even! If you want to get smacked in the face or punched, that is.

🧛‍♂️Meme1: - Do anything to make her smile. - Always make her laugh.

🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: Hah! Good luck trying to figure out how... I might end up scoffing at the desperate attempts instead of laughing at the end result.

🤦🏽‍♀️BP: Don't overdo it, pal. I'm betting your attempts would only creep me out, though, since you're so obsessive...

🤴Meme2: -Remember This;

🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: hard to forget when these cheesy rules for guys and girls are in so many chain letters…

🤴Meme2: •Don't talk about other girls around her

🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: *Rolling eyes* Get a grip! Not every girl is an insanely jealous Mary Sue! Covered in the 257 things chain. It's not a crime to mention other girls around me, but I wouldn't put up with a guy who talked trashy.

🤴Meme2: - •When

🧛‍♂️Meme1:If

🤴🧛‍♂️Memes: she's sad,

🤴Meme2: hold her.

🧛‍♂️Meme1: take her in your arms and tell her everything will be okay.

🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: Better still, just don't say anything since what I might be sad about, you may not know if it will be okay or not. If for sure not, don't humor me with empty reassurances unless you want to get blown up at. Just holding's fine, only if I feel comfortable enough to let you, and don't get any notions in your head about anything beyond simply comforting a person who needs it at the moment.

🤦🏽‍♀️BP: Don't lie to someone in need of comfort. Telling someone it will be okay when you know it won't is just being cruel.

🤴Meme2: •When you fall in love with her, tell her, dont lie about it.

🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: ugh! I think my brain is bleeding!

🧛‍♂️Meme1: - Say I love you to her face not JUST over the phone.

🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: Assuming we're already in a love relationship, That works. But don't make a habit of it. If we're not, my reaction to your confession of love would depend entirely on how I feel about you.

🤦🏽‍♀️BP: If you really love that person, than yes. I hate how overused "I love you" is. So many people say it when they really have no idea what real love is. So unless you're sure, don't even bother. It's better that way.

🧛‍♂️Meme1: - NEVER cheat on her.

🤦🏽‍♀️BP: Bing! Finally, something smart!

🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: Right! Cheat on me, and that's it bud, you're so outa my life with no chance of ever getting back in it again...Zip...Ziltch...Nada! But it's a two-way street, the girl shouldn't cheat either.

🧛‍♂️Meme1: - Tickle her, even when she says stop.

🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: No, no, no! Stop means stop, and if you don't listen to me and stop when I tell you to, we're finished. I can't stand guys who think a girl means yes when she says no.

🤦🏽‍♀️BP: Gah! No means no, creep! It's not code for yes, it means NO!

🧛‍♂️Meme1: - Don't say I love you unless you mean it.

🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: Didn't we already plunge off this cliff?

🤦🏽‍♀️BP: Didn't I already cover this?

🧛‍♂️Meme1: - Listen to her when she talks.

🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: And don't expect me to talk all the time.

🤦🏽‍♀️BP: Don't you do that to everyone? When you're talking to a friend, listen to him/her! It's just rude, otherwise. That's why I hate it when people listen to their iPods when they're talking to you. It's like, "Hello, you talkin' to me or just mumbling generic things to get my to shut up?"

🧛‍♂️Meme1: - Tell her your secrets.

🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: And expect any range of reactions depending on what those secrets are.

🤦🏽‍♀️BP: I hope you aren't expecting a grand reaction for every single one of those secrets. The reaction will fit the secret.

🧛‍♂️Meme1: - Protect her.

🤦🏽‍♀️BP: From what? If we lived in a post-apocalyptic society, and you had the only weapon, sure. How about protect each other, just in general?

🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: Argh! *Rolling eyes* I'm not a damsel in distress, hopefully I wouldn't need protection from you, but if you follow all this advice, well, can we say stalker? Ewww! Get away!

🧛‍♂️Meme1: - Brush any hair out of her face and say something chessy like:

🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: 'Chessy? How do you say something 'chessy'?

🤦🏽‍♀️BP: Check mate!

🧛‍♂️Meme1: "Sorry, I just want to see your beautiful face." and add a cheesy smile :P Girls love it xP

🤦🏽‍♀️BP: Oh, I see, you meant CHEESY. At any rate, I think that's creepy.

🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: Not this girl! 1. I can't stand people obsessed with "owning" a g/bf as a piece of eye-candy and if you're attraction to me is only skin-deep, you can make like diarrhea and move on. 2. My hair's too short to get in my face let alone flick out of it, so you should get a good look at my face every time you look at me, so there. 3. Just what do you think you're doing messing with my hair. Did I not brush it well enough or something? Huh? Huh? Well? 4. Stop with the 'beautiful' already, it's become practically meaningless - unless you want to compliment me on my music.

🧛‍♂️Meme1: Girls

🤴Meme2: Guys

🤴🧛‍♂️Memes: repost

🤴Meme2: respond:

🧛‍♂️Meme1: as - A True

🤴Meme2: Perfect

🤴🧛‍♂️Memes: Boyfriend

🧛‍♂️Meme1: - I

🤴Meme2: I'd

🧛‍♂️Meme1: would

🤴🧛‍♂️Memes: do this for

🤴Meme2: her

🧛‍♂️Meme1: my girl any day

🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: Nothing doing!

🧛‍♂️Meme1: In the next 30 seconds and something great will happen to you today.

🤦🏽‍♀️BP: Yeah right! Get lost.

🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: Yeah right, and the planet Mars is over-run by little green men about to beam down and colonize the Earth.

🤴🧛‍♂️Memes: If you don't

🤴Meme2: re-post this in 4 minutes,

🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: My IQ will not have dipped within four minutes.

🤴🧛‍♂️Memes: you will lose

🧛‍♂️Meme1: someone very important to you.

🤴Meme2:the one you love.

🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: Oh sure, and I've got a bridge to sell you too. The only thing I've lost so far is my composure from laughing. What a joke! As if some chain letter can curse you with the loss of someone close to you in your high school years. Roflol Get real!

🤦🏽‍♀️BP: Heh, don't make me laugh! As if you have the power to kill a microbe, let alone a person!

🤴Meme2: If you re-post this in 4 minutes,

🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: I'd be making a fool of myself. No thanks.

🤴Meme2: the one you like/love will Call you/Message you

🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: Buttkiss! There is no one I like/love in that way, and my forwarding this dreck wouldn't make him get a sudden urge to give me a call if he existed…

🤴Meme2: ~Le Stolen~ ♥

🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: BLECK!

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