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How many animal rescue/rights/welfarists does it take to change a light bulb?

by Indy

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How many animal rights/welfare rescuers does it take to change a lightbulb?

1% to notice the light is burned out and post it to the forum.

20% to start a discussion on whether or not it's cruel to use and change light bulbs at all.

50% to start ranting about who was at fault for leaving the light on so long.

50% to say that light bulbs burning out is a natural occurance and to deny they were the ones to leave the light on.

20% to post pictures of some of the 50% who were said to have a history of burned out bulbs.

35% to counterpost pics and stories of the 20% with their own light bulbs burned out.

60% to lambaste the rest about the cruelty of changing the light bulb when the burned out bulb had given its all and this is the thanks it gets?

10% to crosspost the light bulb abuse stories to other forums along with dire DNA (Do Not Adopt!" warnings.

1% to start a private email war and send hatemail to a fellow member.

5% to join in and gang up via private email.

5% to forward any responses from the harassee far and wide to other forums with notes about how cruel this person is for working his light bulb to death.

2% to post lame attempts at poetry about the cruel light bulb abuse cases, replete with cussing and namecalling, and dumb speculations about what an old or ugly person they're writing about.

50% to praise the not-so-poetic attempts as absolute "masterpieces!"

40% to offer to start a light bulb sanctuary but they need funds for the upkeep.

10% to say that's a great idea but they can't donate because they haven't got the money to spare.

75% continuing to discuss the ethics of the use of light bulbs, with the majority agreeing it is better to remain in the dark.

25% yelling at the rest to stop beating their chests and get on with what's really important, light bulb care!

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