I almost didn't survive this one. It's a CNN reporter's wench&whinge Twitter quit rage rant.
💩CNN: 😡Alisyn Camerota: Why I'm breaking up with Twitter
By Alisyn Camerota, CNN
Updated 8:32 AM ET, Wed July 12, 2017
🧝♀️Ocean Elf: Ugh. "breaking up with" makes it sound like Twitter was some kind of dating/romance thing. Urgh. 😬 I can tell this is going to make my head hurt. 🤕
💩CNN: Story highlights
😡I joined Twitter looking to connect with people, do good, share my messages and build community
🧝♀️Ocean Elf: Then CNN is hardly a good fit for you if that was really the case. But come on. You'd actually get a lot more respect if you ditched CNN. Nobody worth listening to, cares that much about Twitter or why the next person is leaving it.
💩😡CNN: There is valuable dialogue there, but now that the reality of being on Twitter has become much darker, I'm leaving, Camerota writes
🧝♀️Ocean Elf: Somehow I get the feeling you tweeted out typical CNN tripe and got heat for it. 😏
💩CNN: Alisyn Camerota is a CNN anchor and co-host on CNN's morning show "New Day." The views expressed in this commentary are solely those of the author.
🧝♀️Ocean Elf: Fine. Dandy. That doesn't make this any less laughable, or your station suck less.
💩CNN's 😡Alisyn Camerota: Dear Twitter (attn: trolls),
🧝♀️Ocean Elf: Huh? You're including trolls in this? Why? *SMH*
💩CNN's 😡Alisyn Camerota: It's over. I'm breaking up with you.
🧝♀️Ocean Elf: Ugh, there you go with this "breaking up" business. 😵
Unfortunately, the net is full of idiots, and since I don't follow anyone at CNN, I had no idea of your account nor which people having anything to do with it are genuinely ticked off at something you said/did, or how many are stupid trolls. Some story on another site is how I found out. but the last thing you should do to trolls is let them know you're leaving because of them.
💩CNN's 😡Alisyn Camerota: I know, it's sad. We've been together a long time. Remember my first tweet in May 2009? "Happy Mother's Day!" My God, listen to how hopeful I sounded.
🧝♀️Ocean Elf: Ugh ugh ugh! "we've been together a long time" Excuse me, I'll be cringing hard throughout this. 😵 😓
Look, a happy Mother's Day wish is hardly something to get this gushy over, lots of people put that on their social networks when Mother's Day rolls around. I can't believe you actually remember your first tweet, or maybe you went back through your Twitter archive to find it...? Wow. Unbelievably pathetic.
I don't remember my first tweet, nor am I going back to look for it. But then, I never thought of Twitter as a date/romance either. 🤢
💩CNN's 😡Alisyn Camerota: Back then, I believed your promises -- that you'd help me connect with people, that you'd be an agent for good in the world, that you'd get my messages out, that you'd help build a community. Back then, you'd surprise me with flower emojis and thoughtful comments. Back then, it was still thrilling to check in with you every day to see how many new followers you'd brought me. Those were the days.
🧝♀️Ocean Elf: Oy... Where do I start? *puts head in hands for a little rest*
Okay... Here we go.
1. Promises to connect with people - every social network does that.
2. Do good in the world - 😖 are you kidding me? Alisyn, you're part of flipping CNN! And as for Twitter's grandiose claim, don't you recognize a sales pitch when you read it?
3. It got your messages out, and apparently those of other people as well, which is what resulted in you leaving over it. You see, Twitter didn't make those claims just to you, but to every potential user.
4. Help build a community - well, that isn't exactly Twitter's strong point, forums and email lists are better platforms for community-building.
5. Thoughtful comments - well, that all depends on the users, doesn't it?
6. Flower emojis - blah. Memes. No really. Cyber/virtual flowers are everywhere. So are those stupid lolcats, rage comics, 'funny cat' and 'cute puppy' videos/gifs/jpgs, ditto for virtual angels, oh, and heart emoticons! I'll use emojis for expression more than anything, oh, and as representations of you guys during mangles like this.
7. New followers - who cares? No seriously, who cares? Apparently everyone but me. Everyone, no matter the platform, annoys me with this desire to have more followers/friends/likes/subscribers etc. It gets utterly insane when they compare other users and their follower/likes/subscriber/friend/contact counts. Can we say "no life"? Please.
💩CNN's 😡Alisyn Camerota: But something's happened to you. You're a shadow of your former self, the one I was first attracted to. It's no fun to be with you anymore.
🧝♀️Ocean Elf: *Cringes hard* Eeeeewwwwwwurgh! Any more of this dating stuff and I'm going to hurl. I agree, Twitter has definitely gone downhill, but more to CNN's direction rather than opposite of it. They're not banning left-wing provocateurs. 😬
💩CNN's 😡Alisyn Camerota: You've become mean and verbally abusive. In fact, you gross me out.
🧝♀️Ocean Elf: Your dating comparisons or whatever that's supposed to be, is grossing me out, and it's not as if your station hasn't been verbally abusive. "Whitelash." and Symone Sanders's calloused attitude toward David Wilcox who could've been killed by BLM cultists.
💩CNN's 😡Alisyn Camerota: You're a cesspool of spleen-venting from people who think it's acceptable to insult other people in public and anonymously.
🧝♀️Ocean Elf: You just described 4chan and Encyclopedia Dramatica. Those trolls no doubt have Twitter accounts too. But let's forget about them for a moment. If we take the troll factor out of this, there is still plenty of reason people are upset with CNN. And you being one of theirs, you are going to be facing some of this wrath, especially when you, as part of CNN, do something to cause it.
💩CNN headline: An avalanche of hate: How a Montana mom became the target of a neo-Nazi troll storm
🧝♀️Ocean Elf: WHAM! 😠 There it is! The "neo nazi" bomb! A big part of your problem is that you see nazis everywhere, 🙄 and where they don't exist, you make them up, 😤 and that's what people genuinely dislike about CNN.
💩CNN's 😡Alisyn Camerota: I don't mean to be harsh. Occasionally, you do let a nice, thoughtful person sneak through with a positive comment or constructive criticism. And I want you to know how much those messages have meant to me. It's wonderful to get compliments -- and you've certainly given me folders full. I've also appreciated the respectful disagreement from kind followers who have opened my eyes to angles and insights I hadn't considered. For years, these comments made all the negativity worth it -- especially coming from those users who stood up for me and fought the trolls on my behalf. God bless them.
🧝♀️Ocean Elf: Somehow that doesn't sound like a few decent people sneaking through, but rather like you had yourself a pretty good time, with a lot of support.
The trolls aren't worth considering, but I wish people opposing CNN's dishonesty and race-baiting would oppose trolls just as much. And by that, I mean, give them the exclusionary treatment. "You don't belong with us, we oppose left extremism, you're just an attention-seeking idiot, get lost."
💩CNN's 😡Alisyn Camerota: But I feel bad having others fight my fights. Like me, I'm sure they're busy with jobs and children to raise and don't have time for the hate.
🧝♀️Ocean Elf: Trolls need to be smacked down or ignored, and sometimes it's hard to tell when to use which tactic. If you run a site, you can smack them down. If you don't, you can ignore. Trolls hate being ignored as much as they hate being kicked to the curb.
💩CNN's 😡Alisyn Camerota: Of course, some of this is my fault.
🧝♀️Ocean Elf: If you tweeted the sort of stuff typical for CNN, then yes, that is your fault. ☹️
💩CNN's 😡Alisyn Camerota: I've been leading you on.
🧝♀️Ocean Elf: Eww! 😬 Excuse me... 🤢 I'm going to be sick...! 🤮
💩CNN's 😡Alisyn Camerota: I've made you think I like you more than I really do.
🧝♀️Ocean Elf: *choke, gag* Oh, just give it a rest!
💩CNN's 😡Alisyn Camerota: The truth is, I haven't cared about you for a long time -- in fact, I've been avoiding you.
🧝♀️Ocean Elf: You should've avoided writing this awkward tripe. This isn't just purple prose, it's purple sickly greenish brown.
💩CNN's 😡Alisyn Camerota: I go weeks at a time without reading you, leaving you to prattle on thinking you have my attention -- or worse, stew in your own nasty juices, yelling in all caps, imagining that I'm listening. But I'm not. I checked out long ago, when you became a buzzkill and a bore.
🧝♀️Ocean Elf: So why bother to write this absurd Dear John/Twitter letter after all that time, when the solution would be to close your account quietly?
💩CNN's 😡Alisyn Camerota: I don't like thinking of people using you, typing away with nothing but a keyboard and a chip on their shoulder, but that's the company you're keeping.
🧝♀️Ocean Elf: It's a social network. It's meant to be used by people with keyboards. You can't blame the platform itself for trollish stupidity. That's on the individual users themselves. Sure, the users make a site good or bad, but Twitter itself isn't sentient. Your going on as if it is, well, that's really creepy. 😨
💩CNN's 😡Alisyn Camerota: You're hanging out with
🧝♀️Ocean Elf: *Sigh* No,not even Google hangs out with anybody, though they provide a service called hangouts. This is a social network platform. You were hanging out on it. Not the other way around.
💩CNN's 😡Alisyn Camerota: people who find satisfaction spewing vitriol, people who spread racism, misogyny, and anti-Semitism.
🧝♀️Ocean Elf: 🙄 Oh, and CNN isn't at all guilty of racism "whitelash" or misandry or anti-Christian sentiment, I suppose...?
Whenever somebody cries "RACISM!" "MISoGyNY!" or "ANTI-SEMITISM!" The first course of action should be to question where on the political spectrum that cry is coming from. If it's from CNN/the left, it's more than likely going to be a lie or half-truth.
💩CNN's 😡Alisyn Camerota: Perhaps it's worse than I know.
🧝♀️Ocean Elf: No. You just want it to be. You see racism and misogyny where it doesn't exist, 🙄 and that is excluding the troll contingent and mgtow... Yes, feminism is sexist.
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💩CNN's 😡Alisyn Camerota: Maybe you're struggling with addiction: addiction to outrage. It's a powerful drug.
🧝♀️Ocean Elf: 😏 Hooh, boy! You ought to take that message right to your station, they fuel outrage, and coddle those mired in it.
💩CNN's 😡Alisyn Camerota: I wish I could help you kick it.
🧝♀️Ocean Elf: No you don't, or you wouldn't be with CNN.
💩CNN's 😡Alisyn Camerota: I feel its pull sometimes too.
🧝♀️Ocean Elf: That is the best thing you've said so far.
💩CNN's 😡Alisyn Camerota: But I don't want to be sucked in.
🧝♀️Ocean Elf: You already are.
💩CNN's 😡Alisyn Camerota: All I can do is save myself from the bitter dark places where you like to dwell.
🧝♀️Ocean Elf: The only way you can do that is by leaving CNN and its insane politics behind.
💩CNN's 😡Alisyn Camerota: So, I'm done. I'm moving on. I'm looking for something else, something real and lasting. Something that involves actual people, not nearly 48 million bots. I prefer my real friends over fake humanoids run by computers and true trolls filled with genuine venom.
🧝♀️Ocean Elf: Much as I'd love Trolls to get cyber-whipped for their often repulsive stupidity, their venom isn't genuine. They "do it for the lulz". Any real venom that comes from genuine justifiable outrage doesn't come from trolls, including SJW.
💩CNN's 😡Alisyn Camerota: Call me old fashioned, but I like hearing viewers' real thoughts, not the ones special interest groups pay them to tweet.
🧝♀️Ocean Elf: such as CNN?
💩CNN's 😡Alisyn Camerota: And to the tens of thousands of folks who took time to follow me,
🧝♀️Ocean Elf: Because you just couldn't resist boasting about your popularity, like any other nitwit fixated on numbers of followers/likes/subs they get. 🙄 You simply could've said "To all my followers" but no...
💩CNN's 😡Alisyn Camerota: I trust we'll find a kinder place to reconnect.
🧝♀️Ocean Elf: You could always go to Dailykos... No, it's not kinder, but it would be a place more to your liking.
💩CNN's 😡Alisyn Camerota: So listen, Twitter, maybe sometime in the distant future, we can be friends again.
🧝♀️Ocean Elf: "friends" ... with a social network... I can feel my IQ dipping. Must get out before my brain shuts down, or melts, or, something...
💩CNN's 😡Alisyn Camerota: Maybe you'll become more thoughtful, and I'll be excited to see your icon on my screen again. But I'm not hopeful. Until then, I'm logging off, killing my account. And know this -- I won't miss you for a second.
🧝♀️Ocean Elf: All of this leading up to "I'm killing my account. Wow what an attention-grab. I've known drama queens who've pulled this on FB and email lists. They've shut down their accounts, or threatened to, only to come back within the month or when enough people begged them to come back and told them what totally beautiful snowflakes they were. I even played into that at first, but soon got disgusted enough with their self-pity so that I wanted to shove them out that proverbial door myself. So I'm not excusing trolls, but you get no sympathy from me either, and I'm pretty sure Twitter won't miss you any more than they'd miss any other user or troll.
As for the fantasy relationship, apparently that's actually a thing with some people. The cringiest video I've seen in a while.
Over and out.
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