🤥CP: A Stupid Chain Letter
🧝♀️Ocean: That's what they are. Every last one of them.
🤥CP: Heads up, this isn't exactly a creepypasta.
🧝♀️Ocean: Bull. Of course it is, or else it wouldn't be on the CP sites.
🤥CP: It's just a true story I thought some people might find interesting.
🧝♀️Ocean: Bull crap. It's no truer than any other pasta/chain letter tale.
🤥CP: I know it's become a cliche for people to start off creepypastas with the line "This is true, I don't care if you believe me." in a vain attempt to immerse you into their story.
🧝♀️Ocean: And you do it anyway. Don't think for a moment I'm going to buy into your double-speak of "I know the rest all say that but mine is like too trues" because it's still bollox. Especially since the upshot will eventually be "Guess what? that chain letter must've worked!" So let's see if I get it right and add another gold star to my collection of cyberspace tokens.
🤥CP: However, I pride myself on my honesty, and I can honestly say this really happened to me.
🧝♀️Ocean: Oh, sure, look, I'm not buying that. "Mine is truer than all the rest" Yeah right.
🤥CP: I think all you skeptics out there will find that this story isn't too far fetched to believe anyways.
🧝♀️Ocean: *Rolling eyes* I'll never be convinced, so you might as well stop trying. If you've got a story to tell, please, just get on with it already.
🤥CP: One night back in 2009 or so,
🧝♀️Ocean: 2009 was the year Slender Man got created.
🤥CP: I was browsing YouTube.
🧝♀️Ocean: Where plenty of idiot trolls reposted chain letter comments, and people put up videos pretending chain letters are true.
🤥CP: I believe I had just gotten done watching a viral video of some kind
🧝♀️Ocean: Oh yeah, I forgot to mention people also make videos that turn into chain letters by going viral. Sometimes it's intensional, sometimes not. I'm guessing it probably was in this case.
🤥CP: when I started looking through the comments section.
🧝♀️Ocean: Bingo. What was I just saying about idiots posting stupid chain letter comments? So, you went on Youtube to watch video chain letters that also got comment chain letters. Bleckh.
🤥CP: My eyes fell upon a chain letter. It read:
🧝♀️Ocean: Your eyes fell upon - I'm getting this really weird mental image. Anyway, here comes the stupidity.
anna's chain: "Hi. My name is Anna."
🧝♀️Ocean: What? Another Anna? Mangled and added.
Anna: "I was raped and brutally murdered back in 1996."
🧝♀️Ocean: No you were not, at least, not murdered. Dead people don't write stuff to the living. Dead people don't write, period.
Why did you put the "brutally" before "murdered" when it belongs before the words "raped and murdered"? Are you implying that a murder is brutal and a rape isn't? see how that just doesn't work?
Anna: "If you don't copy/paste this to 10 other videos in the next hour,"
🧝♀️Ocean: I won't be a gullible jerk, and the internet will be grateful for one less spamming idiot.
Anna: "I'll murder you in your sleep."
🧝♀️Ocean: Yeah right. You might want to ask Bloody Mary and every other dealive schmuck who tried to pull this on me how well that went for them and why I'm still here.
Now shut it and vamoose.
🤥CP: Or at least it said something along those lines.
🧝♀️Ocean: They usually do, and some of them like this one added in an extra bit of tasteless with the rape reference… *Scowl*
🤥CP: Even though I was a 14 year old child, I was logical enough to not entertain this buffoonery.
🧝♀️Ocean: Which is why you now believe in it because of yadda yadda yadda. Don't try this on a jaded netizen like me, because that angle won't work either. It's entirely predictable.
🤥CP: I mean, come on. It's one thing if you expect me to believe in ghosts.
🧝♀️Ocean: I don't believe in ghosts, so why on earth would I expect you to? and who cares what the chain letter originator expects, beyond giving them just the opposite?
🤥CP: But expecting me to fear a ghost that's going to warn me, along with thousands of other people, about it hunting me down via a short youtube comment? Get real.
🧝♀️Ocean: Oh, so you think that's the only obvious giveaway this thing is crap? There's a lot more obvious bogusness here. The most obvious being the claim to write a message after already being dead. The next, simply the fact it's a chain letter.
🤥CP: Later that night, I naturally grew tired and headed upstairs to my bedroom to sleep. I'll admit, the more I thought about it, the scarier the chain letter seemed.
🧝♀️Ocean: Knew it. *Gets another gold star off cyber-shelf*
Well you know what? I've read and mangled many chain letters in my time, some containing a lot more detail, along with a lot more bullcrap claims. They never caused me any unease. Not immediately after reading them, not after trouncing them, not hours later or when I was about to go to sleep.
So you're not only a wuss next to me, you're a typical anti-chain cliche.
🤥CP: Maybe it was just the silence, or the complete darkness, but I had trouble falling asleep that night.
🧝♀️Ocean: I'm used to noise in my room, and it's got nothing to do with memes. Traffic outside, the pipes, and I've even had the odd pet or two in there at night.
So why mention the silence and darkness at all? Surely as far as noise goes, this night of yours should be like any other. The darkness, even that shouldn't faze you. Surely you've gone to sleep on other nights when the moon and stars weren't visible because of cloud-cover.
You're not scaring me, or convincing me the chain letter made your night darker and silent.
🤥CP: None the less, in the morning I woke up. It was just like any other day,
🧝♀️Ocean: See, told ya.
🤥CP: but with one exception. I was smiling. I was smiling because I was proud of myself. Why? For not being as gullible as the other kids my age, of course. They had been wasting their time spreading around those chain letters, and I felt mighty knowing I was one of the rare few who wasn't living my life in fear.
🧝♀️Ocean: But you did sorta believe in it the night before. So I'm not willing to acknowledge your semi-accomplishment as a real triumph, especially when you've got more of this story coming up, and it will be designed to convey another "OMG chain letters must be really real after all!"
🤥CP: Over the course of the next few weeks I saw plenty of chain letters, sometimes the same ones. However, there was only one that stuck with me, and still sticks with me to this day.
🧝♀️Ocean: Then you're still a scared little dweeb.
🤥CP: Surely you've heard the urban legend about the clown statue right?
🧝♀️Ocean: *What - the - ? Of all the moronic chain letters out there, you had to be scared of that one?
You wanna know what fun we had pummelling it?
🤥CP: If you haven't, you should look it up. But if that's too much of an inconvenience, here's the basic version. A babysitter tucks the children she's sitting into bed and is weirded out by a clown statue she sees in the corner of the kids' room. She phones the parents asking if she can cover it up, and they reveal they own no such statue. They tell her to call the police and she takes the kids and gets out. Or, in the less soft versions of the story, the cops arrive to discover the interior of the household covered in their blood & organs. It was basically that story, put into a youtube comment. It had a typical chain letter style ending that read "send this to 10 other videos within the hour or the clown will come and kill you with a chainsaw at 3 AM".
🧝♀️Ocean: Hmm, hadn't seen the mutation that included blood all over the house, but if I come across it, it will get mangled in with the rest. Yes, I have seen moronic trolls repost the clown statue chain in Youtube comments too. Never scared me. Only irritated me.
🤥CP: I did the same as before and refused to fall victim to my gullibility and fear.
🧝♀️Ocean: That's the difference between you and me. I have no such gullibility and fear of chain letters.
🤥CP: Except on this night, my insomnia kicked in and I couldn't sleep.
🧝♀️Ocean: Or so you claim.
🤥CP: I went back down to the living room and stayed up all night watching youtube videos and playing computer games.
🧝♀️Ocean: Yeah, considering the viral video crap and crappy chain comments you watch, and I wouldn't be surprised if the games you play are those involving Slender Man, Jeff The Killer etc.
🤥CP: I was just getting bored and finally a bit groggy,
🧝♀️Ocean: Bored, well, why am I not surprised?
🤥CP: possibly even ready to finally hit the hay when I looked over and saw the clock. It read "2:45 AM".
🧝♀️Ocean: *Rolling eyes* So now you're going to build this thing up to 3 AM where you will claim to see a clown or something monumentally stupid like that.
🤥CP: Though my inner skeptic was telling me it was just going to be like every other night, I was actually kind of scared. I don't know why. It was probably just my tired mind causing me to become a bit less logical and more paranoid.
🧝♀️Ocean: Yeah, you got two modes typical of brats trying to scare others with chain letters. 1. Easily bored. 2. Easily freaked out.
I'm not surprised or impressed, so cut the excuse-making.
🤥CP: I tried to go back to watching youtube videos but I found myself glancing at the clock every other minute.
🧝♀️Ocean: *Rolling eyes* Pathetic.
🤥CP: It eventually became 2:50, 2:55, and then finally, 3:00 AM.
🧝♀️Ocean: Let me guess, enter stage-left *corny spooky music* Da killa clown statue! *Rolling eyes*
🤥CP: Then... nothing happened. I was sitting there waiting, scared and paranoid, in my living room for three whole minutes before I realized how ridiculous I was being. A wave of relief washed over me, but I was a bit disappointed in myself for letting that senseless internet garbage get to me so badly.
🧝♀️Ocean: Yeah, right, you didn't get this far only to conclude with something sensible like "The killer clown chain is bullcrap."
🤥CP: That's when I heard a loud creaking sound, and turned my head to see the door to my basement had been opened halfway.
🧝♀️Ocean: *Rolling eyes* So what? You never said you were alone in the house.
🤥CP: I was scared senseless,
🧝♀️Ocean: As usual…
🤥CP: and my eyes didn't move from that door. I sat there for at least fifteen minutes, heart beating loudly in my chest as I looked onward, expecting to see it open further to reveal a chainsaw wielding clown covered in dried blood.
🧝♀️Ocean: *Rolling eyes* Oh, get a grip.
🤥CP: After the fifteen minutes, my heart slowed just enough for a small bit of rationality to sink in. What if it was just the wind from the nearby window?
🧝♀️Ocean: Exactly! That, or someone else living at your house was downstairs. I was thinking of suggesting the wind idea, but don't know the layout of your house. A window in the right location, and a draft-through could sure do that.
🤥CP: After bracing myself and gathering up all my courage, I quietly but quickly made my way to the door and pressed it firmly shut, locking it.
🧝♀️Ocean: A basement door that locks? Really? Anyway, you are eventually going to tell me it swung open again blahblahblah… And I still won't believe you.
🤥CP: I backed away from it cautiously and returned to my seat in the living room. I began to feel a lot safer, though I didn't feel entirely safe near the basement for a few months or so afterward.
🧝♀️Ocean: Oh, wow, finally one thing I didn't predict correctly! Woot!
So you experienced for yourself that the clown is a hoax and you were still scared of the basement for months after? *Rolling eyes*
🤥CP: Anyways, that's my real life experience. Maybe it doesn't sound like the creepiest thing to you. That's fine. To me, it was a genuinely horrifying experience.
🧝♀️Ocean: Everybody gets creeped out over something, but chain letters? Unless you're under the age of 10, that's just stupid.
🤥CP: I think the main thing that kept me scared of my basement for so long wasn't necessarily just the basement door opening, because like I said, it could have just been the wind. I think it was more the fact that at the time of the basement door opening, the only nearby window had been shut.
🧝♀️Ocean: If you had mentioned that earlier, that would've cancelled out the wind idea…But not that someone else living at your house happened to be down there…
If you had specified you were alone in the house, I'd just chalk this all down as you having some kind of nightmare/sleepwalking incident.
So you still didn't scare me.