Jeff the Killer: Return of The Living Nightmare

Jane The Avenger

Jane Arkensaw and Callum, one of her boyfriends


🙍‍♂️💖Callum: I’m not sure how long it’s been since I’ve documented my experience with the notorious Jeff the Killer, but it feels like ages. But I saw him again recently. I will remember this encounter the best I can and let whoever that has bothered to keep following these documentations know about this encounter.

🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: Right. "It's been ages, but it's been recent, I'll try to remember what I can remember." Got it.

🙍‍♂️💖Callum: It was the morning of the 29th of August; I was relaxing on the local beach. I was trying to forget all the nightmares I was having about Jeff, but the more I thought about it, the more I thought about if I could trust Jane.

🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: I have no idea which year that particular August 29 happened, but anyway, no, you can't trust Jane. She's too eaten up with revenge.

🙍‍♂️💖Callum: I didn’t want to think I couldn’t trust Jane. She was such a nice girl,

🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: Well, she's not absolutely horrible like Jane Richardson, but she does have some problems.

🙍‍♂️💖Callum: not one I shouldn’t be able to doubt.

🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: Sometimes a little doubt is a good thing.

🙍‍♂️💖Callum: Just as I was getting back to my relaxation, I got a call from Jane. Jane and I then started to talk.

🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: Gah, what else other than talk and text would you be doing on the phone? *Rolling eyes*

🙍‍♂️💖Callum: Here was a part of the conversation I could remember:

🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: all of this so far could've been condensed into something like "I remember my nightmarish experiences with Jeff, but I also know Jane, one of his victims who survived; she called me, and this is what we talked about."

🙍‍♂️💖Callum: Jane: *stutters* Can you trust me, Callum?

🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: This just after you went on about if you should trust her? Wow this is a bit contrived.

🙍‍♂️💖Callum: Me (Callum): *long silence*

Jane: *starting to get angry* Well, do you?

🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: Cool it, Jane!

🙍‍♂️💖Callum: Me (Callum): *quickly* Yes, Jane. I can trust anyone as beautiful as you.

🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: Oh, shut it! You're making me sick! Everybody's so dang hung up on 'beautiful'! Give me a freaking break!

🙍‍♂️💖Callum: Jane: *flattered* Awww. Thanks sweetie.

🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: *Gags*

🙍‍♂️💖Callum: Me (Callum): No problem, Janie.

🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: Yuck!

Jane: When you get back, I’ve got a surprise for you.

🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: Excuse me. *Leaves to do more hurlage*

🙍‍♂️💖Callum: Me (Callum): I’m on my way, Janie

🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: Ugh.

🙍‍♂️💖Callum: *Jane ends the call*

🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: Ugh! That was so horribly sappy.

🙍‍♂️💖Callum: I then got up on my feet and started walking to Jane’s home. I just wondered what surprise Jane had for me. Was it a gift or was it something else?

🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: I'm guessing something else... *Wince*

🙍‍♂️💖Callum: Whilst I was walking, I remembered that I had a bit of money, so I bought a cheap pair of headphones and plugged them into my HTC Wildfire smartphone. I flicked through my music library until I found, and played, ‘All I Ever Wanted’ by Swedish music artist Basshunter. It took me ten minutes to get to Jane’s home after my small pause.

🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: And all that was supposed to matter because?

🙍‍♂️💖Callum: When I got to Jane’s place, I slowly opened the door as walked in. Nothing happened; I started walking normally. It was when I walked into Jane’s bedroom when Jane jumped into my arms and kissed me several times.

🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: *Cringe* I was right. something else. TMI kind of something else.

🙍‍♂️💖Callum: “Jane” I blushed.

🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: I gagged.

🙍‍♂️💖Callum: “What is it?” Jane asked.

🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: You tell him, Jane, this was your rotten idea, remember?

🙍‍♂️💖Callum: “Your eyes look…normal” I answered.

🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: Who cares?

🙍‍♂️💖Callum: “So?” she asked.

🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: Playing it cool, Jane? You don't fool me.

🙍‍♂️💖Callum: “You look even more beautiful” I replied.

🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: Gah!*Facepalm* Stop with the freaking 'beautiful' already! Going on about appearance like that is so shallow and cliche.

🙍‍♂️💖Callum: Jane blushed. “Thanks baby” she said. Then she kissed me again.

🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: Again with the blush. *Rolling eyes* She used to blush over Jeffrey, too, you know.

🙍‍♂️💖Callum: “No problem, beautiful” I said to Jane as I blushed a deep red. I then kissed her.

🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: !!!!!!!!!!!!!! *Stuff goes flying* I'm going to lose my mind! Enough with the 'beautiful! Enough! and cut out all this gross kissing!

🙍‍♂️💖Callum: I honestly forgot what happened after I said that phase,

🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: So WTH was the point? Your snog-fest was nauseating to read. I can guess what happened afterword, but I'm not going to bother writing it down other than add that drugs were likely involved.

🙍‍♂️💖Callum: but the next morning; I woke up with Jane hugging me in bed.

🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: *Barfs* This has given me a full blown case of the flu! I'm dying! And I'm not going easily!

🙍‍♂️💖Callum: Jane would normally do this,

🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: Ugh! So she's really got you wrapped tightly around her little finger. She must have some purpose in mind for you, maybe she wants to use you to try getting Jeffrey killed, since she can't seem to manage it herself. I think that must be it.

🙍‍♂️💖Callum: but this time, I looked over the side of the bed and saw mine and Jane’s clothes scattered across the floor.

🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: Ugh. Who wants to know all this?

🙍‍♂️💖Callum: I then blushed a very deep shade of red

🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: Oh, for the love! Stop all this blushing! Who in their right mind takes note of how often they blush anyway?

🙍‍♂️💖Callum: and freaked out a little because I had no idea what Janie and I did.

🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: Freaked out a little? You either freak out or you don't... And maybe I was right about the drugs, too. Or you would remember...

🙍‍♂️💖Callum: Jane then woke up and looked at me with her green eyes, smiling. “Wow Callum” she yawned, “Last night was great!”

🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: As I thought, she drugged you, and then you did the nasty. *Grimace* And I'm tired of such a big fuss being made over eye color.

🙍‍♂️💖Callum: “W-what do mean, Janie?” I stuttered, trying hard to hide my blush.


🙍‍♂️💖Callum: “You don’t remember?” Jane sighed. “We had sex last night, if you wanna know the truth Callum”

🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: *Disgusted expression* Figured as much. *Gets gold star off shelf and ads it to collection*

🙍‍♂️💖Callum: My heart started racing, “Janie, we’re not married or even dating yet and I might’ve gotten you pregnant” I said quickly.

🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: Ugh! TMI overload. I really didn't need to know that.

🙍‍♂️💖Callum: Jane giggled. “Don’t worry Cal, it was great fun anyway” she said whilst she was blushing a bright red.

🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: !!!!!!! *Facepalm...!Facepalm...!Facepalm...!Facepalm...!Facepalm...!Facepalm...!Facepalm...!Facepalm...!*

Cut the blushing!

Now... Big problems with not giving a crap about the risks of slutting it up. Unplanned, worse, unwanted pregnancy. Risk of getting STDs. To say nothing of the immorality of it all.

🙍‍♂️💖Callum: I ruffled my hand in Jane’s raven black hair

🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: Her "raven black" Mary Sue hair.

No. Jane Arkensaw had chestnut brown hair. It was burned off when Jeffrey set her on fire, trying to kill her. It didn't give her a head of long raven black tresses... So when/if she could grow her hair back in, it would've been brown. If not, she would have to wear a wig to get the raven black look. Not quite so mysterious and romantic now, is it?

.. And you don't ruffle your hand, you ruffle the hair with your hand.

Anyway, I don't want to know about it! Yuck! Enough with the snoggy stuff already!

🙍‍♂️💖Callum: and chuckled and Janie giggled

🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: *Gags*

🙍‍♂️💖Callum: jeff felt jeloues that jane is with another person

🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: 'Jealous' and it's not so much actual jealousy as just wounded pride. Otherwise, Jeffrey couldn't give two craps. He's too in lus with himself to even notice, if it weren't for Jane's initial and obvious crushing on him before he ruined her life. They were never intimate. and now that Jane has found someone else to crush on while she utterly hates Jeffrey, it's a hit to his ego. Simple as that.

🙍‍♂️💖Callum:* About six minutes later, Jane and I got our clothes back on and Jane put her black contact lenses back in.

🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: So she tossed the rotten pair of tacky black contacts Jeffrey gave her, but went and got another pair? That makes no sense. Why? Particularly since black contacts are basically a halloween/cosplay item, not for everyday use. Besides, it's not as if Jane had a vision problem that required contacts other than maybe being blinded in the fire, which wasn't mentioned, so, no sense.

🙍‍♂️💖Callum: Jane and I then went for a walk in the woods.

🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: It would be even better if you jumped in a lake.

🙍‍♂️💖Callum: After ten minutes of walking, Jane asked me a question which I didn’t know whether I wanted to hear it or didn’t want to hear it.

🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: make some sense, man. You could've just said it was a question you weren't sure you wanted to answer.

🙍‍♂️💖Callum: “Can you please tell Mr.Angry dog that I am Me would like to speak with him" Jane passionately asked, “I will”

🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: Since Jeffrey's face is actually a mask that looks something like a composite of that from a corpse and a dog's jaw, I can pretty much guess who Mr. angry dog is.

MrAngrydog is the handle of the creator of Jane Richardson, the actual Jane The Killer, She of the liquid hate, the 211+ body count, she who pretends her victims are Jeff. the Jane I really despise.

🙍‍♂️💖Callum: My heart began to thump very loudly and I began to sweat, “Y-yes Jane, I do love you” I stuttered.

🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: I'm gonna be sick again.

🙍‍♂️💖Callum: Jane then got very close to me and pressed her lips softly on to mine whilst she placed her slim hand on my cheek. After Jane kissed me, I instantly started to hold her in my arms and made out with her.

🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: Oh, gross! Cut the PDA! This is nauseating.

🙍‍♂️💖Callum: Janie giggled, “Stop! It tickles!” she said cheerfully.

🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: *Pfft* Bleh.

🙍‍♂️💖Callum: I then started to hold Jane’s arse, still making out with her.

🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: *Cringe* Why the heck are you telling me this?

🙍‍♂️💖Callum: Jane then pushed me away, “N-no” she mumbled, “Once is enough for one day”

🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: *Sneer* See Jane try to pretend to be Edward Cullen.

See Edward Cullen try to pretend he doesn't want sex all the time.

Neither of them fool me.


🙍‍♂️💖Callum: I then got close to her again, “What’s the matter, Jane?” I asked curiously.

🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: Give it a rest, man! Eww!

🙍‍♂️💖Callum: “I-I think someone’s watching us, Cal” Jane stuttered.

🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: Of course, it's Jeffrey, dontcha know? *Scowl*

🙍‍♂️💖Callum: Just then, Jane and I heard the combined sounds of twigs snapping and leaves rustling, as if someone else was running in the woods.

🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: Yeah, I get it. I still say it's Jeffrey.

🙍‍♂️💖Callum: “Alright, you little punk!” I yelled, “Show yourself”

🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: Trying to be Jane's big hero man, eh? *Sneer* You're not impressing me.

🙍‍♂️💖Callum: I got no reply. I also noticed that Janie was starting to get scared; she always showed this by gripping on to my hand tightly.

🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: Well, she's sure got her script down pat with you, she knows just when to giggle, when to kiss, when to blush, when to act all scared and clutch your hand like some scared little damsel in distress.

🙍‍♂️💖Callum: “I wanna go home” Jane started to sob.

🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: See, she's really playing this up to the dang hilt!

🙍‍♂️💖Callum: I gripped Jane’s hand back and nodded in reply to her request. Jane and I then started to walk back to outside of the forest. The look of fear on Jane’s face was starting to slowly increase with every step me and her took.

🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: So, you're either seeing what really isn't there, or else Jane is one heck of an actress. And I'd think if you were really that scared, you'd be hurrying out of there instead of just - walking.

🙍‍♂️💖Callum: “Hey sh|theads!” Jane and I heard a male voice behind us. “Did you miss me?”.

🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: Watch your stupid mouth, Jeffrey! They might've missed you, but there are those of us about, who will not!

🙍‍♂️💖Callum: Me and Jane then began to hear psychotic laughter coming from behind us.

🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: Put a boot in it, Jeffrey! *Glare*

🙍‍♂️💖Callum: We then turned around to, yet again, come face to face with Jeff.

🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: *Gets gold star off shelf and puts it with massive collection* right on the nose again.

🙍‍♂️💖Callum: Honestly? If Jeff wanted me and Jane dead so much, why didn’t he kill us both the first time we met him?

🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: Don't ask me. Don't even ask him. He's too busy admiring himself.

🙍‍♂️💖Callum: I took a step closer to him. “Why the flare did it take you so long to catch up with me and Jane?” I mocked him as I asked him this. If he was trying to be a threatening serial killer, he wasn’t very good at doing that.

🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: Don't you get it? He's just toying with you.

🙍‍♂️💖Callum: “Why are you so bothered about that black eyed whore anyway?” Jeff laughed.

🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: Says the crapbag who killed his three sets of parents and so many other people. It's all there.

Jeffrey, you are a bloody hypocrite. Poor little ego-bruised Jeffy. Poor, poor little baby. *Sneer*

🙍‍♂️💖Callum: How dare that arsehole say that about Jane.

🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: *Severe expression* Oh, shut it! You're no hero, and Jane's no sweet little Disney Princess! You should've clued into at least that by now! Nice girls do not lure guys to their bedroom and drug them for sex.

🙍‍♂️💖Callum: I formed a fist with my hand.

🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: Oh, good gosh, I didn't think you formed a fist with your mouth! Of all the ways you could describe making a fist, you said that. Ugh!

🙍‍♂️💖Callum: “LISTEN HERE, YOU BURNT-UP C*censored*!”

🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: *Scowl* Watch your mouth! and if you think you're insulting Jeffy Boy by pointing out his burns, you're wrong. Again!

🙍‍♂️💖Callum:: I yelled at him with rage.

🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: Talk about pointing out the obvious. But you forgot something else you yelled at him with. The same thing he also uses in his yelling. Stupidity.


🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: Hey, idiot! Jane *Is* into it! She is freaking right there with you, for crying out loud! She's the one who got you into this mess.

🙍‍♂️💖Callum: Jeff chuckled as he drew out a knife.

🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: The knife, always the knife. Blah, blah, blah.

🙍‍♂️💖Callum: “Or what?” he taunted.

🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: Or you'll just keep being stupid, Jeffrey, like you always are.

🙍‍♂️💖Callum: I then ran towards Jeff and attempted to punch him the stomach, but he slashed my wrist.

🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: And this is where the blood-letting starts. *Rolling eyes*

🙍‍♂️💖Callum: I screamed in pain “YOU m-f(censored)!”

🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: No, he did that to his cousin Camille. Or wanted to. He killed his mothers. Get that straight.

🙍‍♂️💖Callum: I cried as I plunged my foot into his stomach. Jeff fell to the ground, gripping his stomach.

🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: Why did you cry? that makes no sense.

🙍‍♂️💖Callum: I had no remorse for that sorry basilisk.

🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: For once, I agree with you. It's too bad you didn't finish him off. Oh well, leave that to us, or me, if I end up doing him in on my own, yet again.

🙍‍♂️💖Callum: I walked over to Jeff

🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: Oh, ruddy hex! If you were near enough to punch him in the stomach, you didn't need to walk over to him, because you would already be there!

🙍‍♂️💖Callum: and began to violently kick him in his side.

🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: You merely began kicking him?

And since when is kicking not violent?

There's so much wrong with your re-telling that I don't know where to start or finish.

🙍‍♂️💖Callum: After I felt like I’d done enough of showing him that he was NOT threatening, I walked back over to Jane.

🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: And she just fell into your arms, kiss on kiss, pledging her *cough* love *cough* and you walked out into the blissful day, nauseatingly ever after with her... Or so you wish.

But something tells me Jeffrey isn't through with you yet, and neither is Jane. Either of them is going to try using you against the other.

🙍‍♂️💖Callum: “Let’s go home” I said to her, not looking back at Jeff’s beaten and bruised body. I then held Jane in my arms, attempting to shield her from any danger.

🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: *Gags*

🙍‍♂️💖Callum: Just as me and Jane were nearing the forest exit, we heard leaves rustling and twigs snapping at a fast pace.

🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: I said they weren't done with you yet, didn't I? Though after such a violent kicking in the side, Jeffrey shouldn't even be able to get up. Oh, right, he loves being in pain. I keep forgetting that.

🙍‍♂️💖Callum: I then nearly burst out in tears when I heard Jane scream in agony.

🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: Oh, wow, her best performance yet... *Sneer*

🙍‍♂️💖Callum: I knew something was definitely wrong when I saw a butcher knife pieced inside Jane’s back

🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: Well, considering Jeffrey is very good at backstabbing, including the worst form of it, being gutting his own parents, it doesn't surprise me he would fling a knife at Jane's back, literally.

The only thing that confuses me just a little is that he didn't go for you first after what you did to him. Or maybe that was just psych strategy on his part. He would probably know exactly how to torment the heck out of you, while sticking it to Jane at the same time.

🙍‍♂️💖Callum: and that blood was leaking from the wound very slowly.

🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: Which means she's not badly injured. It is not an artery bleed, and probably not too deep.

🙍‍♂️💖Callum: “JANE!” I screamed as I held her body in my arms. I then looked behind me to catch glimpse of Jeff running off into the thick woodland that surrounded us. I then looked back at Jane; tears were streaming down her face as were mine. I placed my hand on her cheek. “J-Jane” I sobbed. “I’m so sorry”

🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: Oh, my heart just bleeds for you guys. Not really.

🙍‍♂️💖Callum: A smile broke across Jane’s once saddened face. “It’s okay” she told me in reply.

🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: See? What did I tell you? You've been had. Sweet little "Janie" used you as an attempt to kill Jeffrey.

🙍‍♂️💖Callum: “I’m gonna get an ambulance” I told her shortly before I laid Jane to rest and ran over to a nearby payphone. I dialled emergency services.

🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: Excuse me for not being moved.

🙍‍♂️💖Callum: It took them roughly half a second to pick up.

🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: Huh? Who in the world actually counts the seconds until somebody answers a call? Particularly if you're supposed to be distressed. Dude, you're weird. Please, shut up.

🙍‍♂️💖Callum: “Hello. What is your emergency?” the woman on the receiving line asked me.

I was still weeping.

🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: You're far too aware of everything that you wouldn't be if you really were distressed.

🙍‍♂️💖Callum: “My name is Callum Bagshaw and my friend, Jane Arkensaw, just had a kitchen knife thrown in her back. She’s losing blood fast”

🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: 1. But you said earlier blood was leaking slowly.

2. You really fixed this so you two would have somewhat rhyming last names?

3. What the heck kind of doofus makes such a blathering emergency call that takes forever to get to the point? This reminds me of the disgusting troll that pranked an emergency service with a phoney murder report. He started the call with "I was playing Pokemon Go and" then he faked being a scared witness to a murder. If it had been a real crime, the stupid game would be the last thing he would be thinking about, so not even mentioned to the EMS at all.

If the EMS wants your name, they'd ask for it.

You should've simply said you witnessed a stabbing, then given the location.

🙍‍♂️💖Callum: I frantically told them over my sobbing.

🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: Oh, this is mind-numbing...!

🙍‍♂️💖Callum: “What is your current destination?” the woman asked.

🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: 'Destination'? Uh, no. A destination is somewhere you're trying to get to. She would be asking for your current location.

🙍‍♂️💖Callum: “The forest near Nicholson Avenue” I replied.

“I’m sending an ambulance right away, Mr Bagshaw” the woman assured me.

🙍‍♂️💖Callum: “Okay” I sniffed before ending the call.

🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: What on earth was the purpose in describing that whole unconvincing thing? Including the freaking sniff at the end of the call? I mean - just - w - t - h???

🙍‍♂️💖Callum: I then ran back over to Jane and sat by her on the log that I’d put her on.

🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: Huh? How does one lay another person right on a log?

🙍‍♂️💖Callum: “They’re sending an ambulance” I told Jane slowly as I began to hold her.

🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: *Scowl* 1. I'm sick of all this coddling of her when she knocked you out for sex and got you involved in her revenge plot.

2. what's with this slowly business? Why tell her anything slowly? I've got this mental image of you suddenly in slow motion as it takes you ten times longer to tell Jane help is coming than it would take you to tell anyone else the same thing.

3. Why bother telling me that you told Jane what you already told me? Please!

🙍‍♂️💖Callum: Jane began to cry as I held her. “Thank you, Cal” she sobbed. ”I love you”

🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: *Rolling eyes* Yeah, right. What an act. *Scoff*

🙍‍♂️💖Callum: “I love you too” I told Jane as tears raced down my face.

🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: Tears - 'raced' -? Lol Oh, this is too much! That was the only thing keeping me from hurling again.

🙍‍♂️💖Callum: When me and Jane arrived at the hospital, they called the police over to ask me questions about the incident.

🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: "When me and Jane" should've been "When Jane and I".

The hospital doesn't usually call the police over to ask you questions, the police arrive there, following up the EMS and actively try to question anyone who might be involved in something like an assault.

And please, don't tell me that you told them everything you already told me in endless detail again.

🙍‍♂️💖Callum: “Okay, sir” the officer began. “Do you have any idea who the individual who attacked the young woman you was?”

🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: Why are they asking you when they should be asking Jane?

🙍‍♂️💖Callum: He was ready with a pencil and pad. He was going to draw exactly what I told him.

🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: Draw? Or take notes?

Oh, wait, I'll bet this is where you get to go into detail about what Jeffrey looks like, which is already well known anyway. *Rolling eyes*

🙍‍♂️💖Callum: I decided to cut to the chase. “It was Jeff the Killer, officer” I told him.

🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: And at that point, they should've realized you weren't all there.

🙍‍♂️💖Callum: The officer face palmed. “Do you think this is a joke?” he sighed. “A young woman nearly DIED today and you’re linking it to someone who DOESN’T even exist?”

🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: Because he doesn't - and neither does she, neither do you, or that officer. Because you're all fictional characters in yet another JTK story.

🙍‍♂️💖Callum: “I’m not joking around” I yelled. “That basilisk nearly murdered the girl I love and you’re gonna deny the truth?”

🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: Excuse me. *Facepalms repeatedly*

🙍‍♂️💖Callum: “Do I need to restrain you, sir?” the denying officer furiously asked me.

🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: The "denying officer" ? Last time I checked, there was no such police division/squad. And what kind of idiotic question is that anyway? He wouldn't ask you first.

🙍‍♂️💖Callum: I was speechless and wanted to punch the officer straight in his flaring face.

🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: *Rolling eyes* all over freaking Jane...

🙍‍♂️💖Callum: First that useless waste of sperm calls me a lair; and then he threatens me?

🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: Oh, you actually said - waste of 'sperm' *Facepalm* The expression is "waste of skin" or "waste of oxygen". Get your mind out of your pants for a second!

🙍‍♂️💖Callum: And he called himself a law enforcer?

🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: At this point I'm not sure which is the bigger moron, you or the cop.

🙍‍♂️💖Callum: What a joke.

🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: Uh, yeah, that's the point. You're a sad joke.

🙍‍♂️💖Callum: “If I was there, I’m not lying” I told the useless c(censored).

🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: Enough! *Glare* You're the one who is clearly useless here!

🙍‍♂️💖Callum: “Fine then, I’ll write this all down in my report.” the officer sighed.

🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: Write down that you're an idiot?

🙍‍♂️💖Callum: A nurse with blonde hair then touched my shoulder. I turned to face her. “Yes?” I asked nervously.

🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: *Rolling eyes*

🙍‍♂️💖Callum: “Miss Arkensaw is okay” she cheerfully told me. “Luckily, the knife didn’t fracture any vital bones or impale any organs”

🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: I could've told you as much. *Reaches for barf bucket* And 'Miss Arkensaw' really? The most the nurse might actually do is refer to her as "your friend" while addressing Jane herself as "Miss Arkensaw."

🙍‍♂️💖Callum: Tears of happiness welled up in my hazel brown eyes. “Thank you” I hugged the nurse tightly.

🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: *Rolling eyes* Nice to know you have hazel eyes. Blah. I don't care.

🙍‍♂️💖Callum: “She won’t even need a wheelchair” the nurse added.

🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: DUH! Of course not, with just a flesh wound to her back.

🙍‍♂️💖Callum: “That’s even better” I said as I unwrapped my arms from around the nurse’s white coat. “Can I see her?”

🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: Oh, really, Callum... You just hugged some complete stranger over this? You dope!

🙍‍♂️💖Callum: “Sure, why not?” the nurse replied as she started to walk me to Jane’s room.

🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: *Facepalm* Oh, just end this already!

🙍‍♂️💖Callum: It took about six minutes to get there.

🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: Oh, good grief! You actually just timed that? Do you time how long it takes to put on your socks too? Sheesh!

Furthermore, six whole minutes?

Uh, I don't think so.

I've gone to see people in the hospital who were on upper floors, and sure it took a little time, but I doubt it was that long unless there was a bit of a wait for the elevator. I sure as heck didn't time it all!

🙍‍♂️💖Callum: When I got inside, I noticed that Jane’s chest was wrapped in a large bandage.

🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: Why? If she just got a flesh wound in her back and is okay, why the near body-wrap? She's not that bad off, remember?

🙍‍♂️💖Callum: “Hey baby” Jane smiled at me. She was obviously happy to see me.

🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: Of course she was, she knew she had you right where she wanted you. The question is if and how much circulation she's already lost in that rancid little finger of hers.

🙍‍♂️💖Callum: I ran over to her bedside.

🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: Oh, this is making me retch.

This is a hospital room. There might even be more beds with more patients in this room. whether there are or not, there isn't room for a grown man to run anywhere once inside a hospital room.

And your continuing to dote on Jane as if she's some poor innocent and injured little tot is really getting on my nerves!

🙍‍♂️💖Callum: “Hey” I said back. I held her hand tightly. “I’m so glad that you’re okay”

🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: Argh!" I said. I face palmed. "I wish this was over!"

🙍‍♂️💖Callum: Jane gripped my hand tighter.

🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: ugh! All this holding hands and tightening grips! I'm gonna hurl again if this doesn't stop!

🙍‍♂️💖Callum: “We’re gonna get that burnt up son of a b|tch if it’s the last thing we do” Jane told me with tears running down her face.

🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: You should start to actually wake up to what's really going on. But you probably won't because of her strategic timing of the big water works.

First of all, the expression she used when referring to Jeffrey. That's typical Jane. All cussing.

Next, she's crying for two reasons. One, to make sure you'll remain way too melty over her to dare question anything she says. 2. She's crying tears of joy that she's managed to get herself such a complete lapdog to help her in her ultimate goal.

She even stated this goal right out. You're just too much of a sucker to realize it. she said you two were going to get Jeffrey if it was the last thing you, meaning you two, do.

🙍‍♂️💖Callum: I gripped Jane’s hand tighter than I’d ever done in the months I’d known her.

🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: *Facewall* !!!!!!

I - am - so - sick - of - all - this - mush - and - gush!

Cut the blushing! Cut the hand-gripping! Cut the saccharin sweet talk! Cut the kissing! Cut the crying! Just - ENOUGH!

🙍‍♂️💖Callum: “I know we will, Jane” I told her with tears starting to stream done my face.

🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: Urgh! Tears either stream down your face or they start rolling, they don't just suddenly become a torrent out of nowhere. Stop this blasted crying over the girl who's using you for sex and a tool in her revenge agenda.

🙍‍♂️💖Callum: “That basilisk will pay for what he did to you”. I then kissed her on the lips for, to her, seemed like forever.

🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: *Cough cough gag gag hurl hurl hurl*

Someone got something for nausea? And I mean, something to cure it, not bring it on? Please!

Yeah, stop all this freaking kissing!

🙍‍♂️💖Callum: “I’ll be getting discharged in a few minutes” Jane told me with a smile.

🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: if that was the case, there would've been no need for the nurse to take you up to see her at all. she would've just told you Jane was already being released. So that makes this visit both nauseating to read about and totally unnecessary.

🙍‍♂️💖Callum: I started to stray away from Jane and started nearing the door. “I’ll wait outside” I said politely. Jane nodded her head and I then walked out of the room.

🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: Blah blah blah. Are you getting anywhere near done?

🙍‍♂️💖Callum: I then knew from that moment that I would have my revenge on Jeff someday;

🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: No, you tool, not your revenge, Jane's got your head so tangled up in knots over her that you don't realize this is all her revenge plot. You're just a convenient means to an end for her. That's all!

🙍‍♂️💖Callum: but how? The police were no help at all and I was in no position to hire a hitman. What could I do? I could kill him myself, but then I’d be a fugitive. I was mentally stuck.

🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: Exactly. You are mentally stuck. I've known that from the get-go.

🙍‍♂️💖Callum: About ten minutes later, Jane came out of her room smiling. I smiled back at Jane.

🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: *Scowl* I'm sick of all your stupid smiling at each other!

🙍‍♂️💖Callum: She then came running towards me with her arms stretched out.

🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: Acting like some excited little three-year-old, happy to see her mommy again. *Sneer* The depths to which Jane takes her act with you knows no bounds!

🙍‍♂️💖Callum: She then

🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: Don't bother with the details! I - do - not - want - to - know!

🙍‍♂️💖Callum: wrapped her slim arms around me. “Callum” Jane sighed with passion. “I love you so much”

🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: *Pukes* I don't remember the last time I felt this sick!

🙍‍♂️💖Callum: I blushed at the very moment she said those words.

🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: Aaaaaaaaaagh! Now it's back to all the stupid freaking blushing blushing blushing! !!!! *Stuff goes flying*

🙍‍♂️💖Callum: “I…Il-love you too, Janie” I stuttered.

🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: Shut up! Shut up! Shut up! Shut up! SHUT - UP!

🙍‍♂️💖Callum: Jane then pressed her lips onto mine. Me / and Jane’s kiss lasted a whole five minutes from what I remembered until we walked back home.

🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: Oh...My...Freaking...Gosh!

A five minute kiss. A - five - minute - kiss?

This is killing me.

This - is - killing - me...

It feels like it is draining me of my life force, sapping my will to get it back. *Hurls several times more*

🙍‍♂️💖Callum: That night, I couldn’t stop thinking about what if Jeff had killed Jane.

🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: *Sigh* Cram it.

🙍‍♂️💖Callum: I didn’t want to think about it; but I had no choice. That basilisk Jeff was going to pay the price and I’ll be the last person he will ever see.

🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: No, Callum, you will not.


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