You May Not Need These 19 Things, But You'll Definitely Want Them Pretty Badly

Oh, this is gonna be fun!

All gather 'round, Ocean's gonna throw this game! *Impish grin*


🙃Title: You May Not Need These 19 Things, But You'll Definitely Want Them Pretty Badly

Posted May 16, by Dominic Trombino

🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: Things I'll want badly? Oh? we'll see about that. *Impish grin*

🙃Dominic Trombino: Some things for sale are pretty useless, but that doesn't mean we don't want them anyway.

🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: That's why infomercials still work to sell junk that sounds remarkable until you get it home, and find out it's really not so great. :p

🙃Dominic Trombino: 1. "Beer goggles" to keep track of your drink

🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: Nope, don't even want them. Don't need them either. For me, they would be truly useless. :p

🙃Dominic Trombino: 2. A mini desk hammock for you feet

🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: Huh? Why? I don't make a habit of putting my feet up on the desk anyway.

🙃Dominic Trombino: 3. A frying pan that you can cook two things in

🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: Ahahaha, now that *is* a good idea! Not absolutely necessary, but actually a good idea if you want to fry two different things that you don't want running together in the same pan.

🙃Dominic Trombino: 4. Egg molds that make your eggs look like sports balls

🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: Nope, definitely useless. I eat my eggs scrambled anyway, and they have to be beaten well first.

🙃Dominic Trombino: 5. A panda toast mold

🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: *Totally perplexed expression* A - panda - toast mold? What the - somebody actually makes this? *SMH* So much no thanks. I just don't get this one. I really don't.

🙃Dominic Trombino: 6. An Oreo dipping spoon

🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: Um could somebody please explain that to me? If you mean an oreo in the shape of a dipping spoon, well, I can sort of see the appeal, but you realize you'd be eating it right along with the ice cream you're dipping it with, right? Meh, I'll stick to crushing cookies into my ice cream, thanks.

🙃Dominic Trombino: 7. "Re-String It"

🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: Whatsit? Does not compute…

🙃Dominic Trombino: 8. A guitar bell that lets people know you've entered the room

🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: What? *Splutters* Uh, no. No thanks. I prefer to enter a room unnoticed and quietly as possible, thank you.

🙃Dominic Trombino: 9. A pancake 3D printer

🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: Uh-uh, no appeal here either.

🙃Dominic Trombino: 10. A mini fridge for your desk

🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: Maybe for the three or four days of +30 Celsius or over 100 F during the summer, otherwise, why?

🙃Dominic Trombino: 11. A door lock you control with your smartphone

🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: Or a smartphone you control with your door lock. :p Sorry, I just couldn't resist! Heh! *Sassy grin*

🙃Dominic Trombino: 12. An elephant dish drainer

🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: Bah, no. Same deal as with the panda toast mold. useless and IMO tacky.

🙃Dominic Trombino: 13. A fan that blows under your blanket

🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf:What's the matter with one blowing over head like normal? Meh - You'd have to actually stick the fan in your bed to get it blowing under your blanket, and then you fall asleep and *SMACK!* Bang your leg/arm/toes against it when you change position or roll over. Not such a genius idea after all, folks.

🙃Dominic Trombino: 14. Salt and pepper shakers that are shaped like magic wands

🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: I'm sure there is such a thing. I've seen shakers in the shape of coffins before, too. Don't use much salt and avoid pepper, so they would be useless to me.

🙃Dominic Trombino: 15. A rolling pin that lets you decorate your cookies

🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: How in the world would you manage this?

🙃Dominic Trombino: 16. Brain ice molds

🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: Nah. Tacky.

🙃Dominic Trombino: 17. A manatee tea infuser

🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: Bleh. Not one for tea and the stuff I drink, I use a Keurig.

🙃Dominic Trombino: 18. A flask that you're able to sneak to the beach

🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: Why in the world would I want to do that? Nope. If I want something to drink while on the beach I'll just bring a bottle of water or lemonade.

🙃Dominic Trombino: 19. An ironing board that doubles as a mirror

🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: What - the heck!?

Why? So much why?????? is there some whizz-kid out there who wants to iron their reflection too?

I can't get away from me as it is. There's a mirror on at the back of my dresser, and there is one in every washroom. Who needs to look at themselvef in an ironing board as well?


That was 1 out of 19 things that I actually might kind of want.

Not great odds.

So take that, all you list-makers out there. If you're sure people might feel this or that way about a number of things you itemize, let's just say, you haven't met me yet. :p

Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha!



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