"Idiot Sightings" and "6 Truths" chain letter

This chain has been going around since as far back as 2007. The "idiot sightings" are said to have happened in various places around the world.

12-19-2007 Fri Jan-25-08 10:59 AM 01/27/2010 12-19-2012 2013 (Last link's story must've been deleted.)

when the same stories are claimed to be from several different places, it should be clear this is not a list of any real accounts, but a series of jokes that are adapted to go viral just about anywhere.

Sometimes this chain comes all in one, other times, it shows up in fragments.

Mutation 5, the Australian version, had the "Six Truths tacked on and we'll deal with those after the Idiot Citings. Even the "truths" section comes in different mutations.

The various mutations here will be numbered to show where they differ and when all or some are the same. The "6 Truths" came in two mutations, one on its own, the other included in the 5th mutation of the "Idiot Sightings" so the stand-alone one will be labeled "Meme5A" and the other, "Meme5B".

* * *

😏Meme2: Idiot Sightings

😼Meme3: Idiot Sightings!

🤡Meme4: Idiot Sightings… Be Aware.


💩Meme6: Canadian Idiot Sightings

🙃Meme1undated: IDIOTS AT WORK


🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: Oh, yay.

🙃Meme1: I was signing the receipt for my credit card purchase when the clerk noticed that I had never signed my name on the back of the credit card. She informed me that she could not complete the transaction unless the card was signed. When I asked why, she explained that it was necessary to compare the signature on the credit card with the signature I just signed on the receipt. So I signed the credit card in front of her. She carefully compared that signature to the one I signed on the receipt. As luck would have it, they matched.

🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: Either it was luck or you're a good forger.


🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: Uh-huh… *Yawn*

🙃Meme1: After interviewing a particularly short-spoken job candidate, I described the person to my boss as rather monosyllabic. My boss said, "Really? Where is Monosyllabia?"

🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: Yeah right. No boss is that 'unedumacated'.

🙃Meme1: Thinking that he was just kidding, I played along and said that it was just south of Elbonia.

🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: 'Elbonia' Albania, yeah right, this is just too contrived. You'd have to have planned this out well in advance.

🙃Meme1: He replied, "Oh, you mean over by Croatia?"

🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: Like I said, you had to have planned on someone giving you an opportunity to bring up Albania, only substitute it for your made-up country. Your boss was likely thinking "It's Albania, you nincompoop" but was unwilling to correct you right then and there.

So what next, are you going to say that Elbonia is a region within Armenia as well? Wouldn't put it past you.

Yeah, that convo between you and your boss likely never really happened. did you think I would be idiot enough to believe you after all of that?


🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: Don't believe everything in chain letters.

🙃Meme1: An actual tip from page 16 of the HP "Environmental, Health & Safety Handbook for Employees:

🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: Is there even such a book? I doubt it. A search only brings up more postings of this old joke.

🙃Meme1: "Blink your eyelids periodically to lubricate your eyes."

🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: Did you steal this from some standup comedy routine? Bill Engvall has a lot of these dumb warnings/advice tidbits in his routines about warnings for stupid people, but they're a lot funnier when presented by him than being reposted in an internet chain letter.





🙃😏😼🤡👺Memes1/5: We had to have the garage door repaired. The

🙃😏😼Memes1/3: Sears


🙃😏😼🤡👺Memes1/5: repairman told us that one of our problems was that we did not have a 'large' enough motor on the opener. I thought for a minute, and said that we had the largest one

M🙃😏😼emes1/3: Sears


🙃😏😼🤡👺Chains1/5: made at that time, a 1/2 horsepower. He shook his head and said,

🙃😏😼🤡👺Memes1/5: 'you need a 1/4 horsepower.'"’ I responded that 1/2 was larger than 1/4. He said,

🙃😏😼Memes1/3: ‘"'NO,

🤡👺Memes4&5: ‘'NOOO,

🙃😏😼🤡👺Memes1/5: it's not.' Four is larger than two.'"’

🙃😏😼🤡👺Memes1/5: We haven't used

🙃😏😼Memes1/3: Sears

🤡Meme4: Garador

👺Meme5: that repairman

🙃😏😼🤡👺Memes1/5: since.

🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: So the same repairman made the same mistake over the same problem from 2007 until the present time at Sears and Garador, wow.





😏😼🤡💩Memes2/4&6: My daughter and

😏😼🤡👺💩Memes2/4&6: I went

😏🤡👺💩Memes2&4/6: through the

😼Meme3: to a

😏😼🤡👺💩Memes2/4&6: McDonald's

😏🤡💩Memes2/4&6: take-out

👺Meme5: driveway

😏😼🤡👺💩Memes2/4&6: window

😏😼🤡👺💩Memes2/4&6: and

😏🤡👺💩Memes2&4/6: I gave the

😏🤡💩Memes2, 4&6: clerk

👺Meme5: cashier

😏🤡👺💩Memes2&4/6: a

😏👺💩Memes2, 5&6: $5

🤡Meme4: £5

🤡👺Memes4&5: note.

😏💩Memes2&6: bill.

😏😼🤡👺💩Memes2/4&6: Our total was

😏😼👺💩Memes2, 3, 5&6: $4.25,.

🤡Meme4: £4.20,

😼Meme3: I gave the clerk a $5 bill and

😏🤡👺💩Memes2&4/6: so I

😏😼🤡👺💩Memes2/4&6: also handed her

👺Meme5: 25c.

😏😼🤡💩Memes2/4&6: a

😏😼💩Memes2, 3&6: quarter.

🤡Meme4: twenty pence piece as well.

😏😼🤡👺💩Memes2/4&6: She said,: ‘"'you gave me too much money.'"’

😏😼🤡👺💩Memes2/4&6: I said, ‘"'’Yes I know, but this way you can just give me

🤡Meme4: £1

😏😼👺💩Memes2, 3, 5&6: a dollar

😏😼💩Memes2, 3&6: bill

👺Meme5: coin

😏😼🤡👺💩Memes2/4&6: back.'"’

😏😼🤡👺💩Memes2/4&6: She sighed and went to get the manager who asked me to repeat my request. I did so, and he handed me back the

😏😼💩Memes2, 3&6: quarter,

🤡Meme4: 20 pence

👺Meme5: 25c,

😏🤡👺💩Memes2&4/6: and said

😼Meme3: saying

😏😼🤡👺💩Memes2/4&6: ‘"'We're sorry, but

😏💩Memes2&6: they

😼Meme3: we

😏🤡💩Memes2,4&6: could not

😼Meme3: cannot

👺Meme5: don't

😏😼🤡👺💩Memes2/4&6: do that kind of thing.'"’

😏😼🤡👺💩Memes2/4&6: The

😏😼🤡💩Memes2/4&6: clerk

👺Meme5: cashier

😏😼🤡👺💩Memes2/4&6: then proceeded to give me back

😏😼Memes2&3: $1 and 75

👺💩Memes5&6: 75

😏😼👺💩Memes2, 3, 5&6: cents

🤡Meme4: 80 pence

😏😼🤡👺💩Memes2/4&6: in change.

😏😼🤡👺💩Memes2/4&6: (Do not confuse the

😏😼🤡💩Memes2/4&6: clerks

👺Meme5: people

😏😼🤡👺💩Memes2/4&6: at

😏😼Memes2&3: McD's.

🤡👺Memes4&5: MacD’s

👺Meme5: in Shepperton Vic.

💩Meme6: MacDonald's.)

🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: So some clerks give back too much money, others, too little, of course, gotta get a jab at McD's in there somewhere.


😏🤡Memes2&4: IDIOT SIGHTING #3:



🙃😏😼🤡👺🤥😈💩Memes:I live in a

🙃😼Memes1&3: semi-rural

😏🤡👺💩Memes2&4/6: semi rural

🙃😏😼🤡👺🤥😈💩Memes: area.

🙃😏🤡👺💩Memes1, 2, 4&6: We

🙃😏😼🤡👺🤥😈💩Memes: recently

🙃😏🤡👺💩Memes1, 2, 4&6: had a new

🙃😏😼Memes1/3: neighbor

🤡👺💩Memes4/6: neighbour

🙃😏🤡👺💩Memes1, 2, 4&6: call

😼Meme3: called

🙃😏😼🤡👺🤥😈💩Memes: the

🙃😼🤡👺💩Memes1&3/6: local township administrative office

🤡Meme4: Highways Department

👺Meme5: local council

🙃😏😼🤡👺🤥😈💩Memes: to request the removal of the

🙃😏😼🤡💩Memes1/4&6:: Deer

👺Meme5: WOMBAT

🙃😏😼🤡👺🤥😈💩Memes: Crossing sign on our road. The reason:

😏😼🤡👺💩Memes2/4&6: ‘Too"'

🙃😏😼🤡👺🤥😈💩Memes: Many

🙃😏😼🤡💩Memes1/4&6:: deer

👺Meme5: wombats

🙃Meme1: were

😏😼🤡👺💩Memes2/4&6: are

🙃😏😼🤡👺🤥😈💩Memes: being hit by cars

😏😼🤡👺💩Memes2/4&6: out here!

🙃Meme1: and he no longer wanted them to cross there.

😏😼🤡👺💩Memes2/4&6: I don’t think this is a good place for them to be crossing anymore.'"’

🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: This is where I'd normally go "Oh, come on, nobody's this dumb!" But then again, there are people passing on chain letters about "snow snakes" and "killer clown statues, and idiots abound in fandoms. And, there are those who spread fandom-pride chain letters for a truly sad display of idiocy.

😏Meme2: From Kingman, KS

👺Meme5: Story from Bauple Qld

💩Meme6: Story from Collingwood, ON

🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: my, but that idiot apparently moves around a lot to be telling everyone off about their dear/wombat crossing signs all over the US, Canada, the UK and australia. Yeah, no, there are real idiots out there, but this story is fiction.


🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: There's no shortage of those considering all the chain letters still being replicated.

🙃Meme1: My neighbor works in the operations department in the central office of a large bank. Employees in the field call him when they have problems with their computers. One night he got a call from a woman in one of the branch banks who had this question: "I've got smoke coming from the back of my terminal. Do you guys have a fire downtown?"

🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: Good gosh, surely nobody's truly that much of an idiot, or, one would think. People have been known to believe all kinds of crap that is utterly without logic, though, such as the rumour claiming Justin Bieber changed his race to "African American" But I'm pretty sure this computer story is just as fictional.


🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: no kidding, that's why there is 4chan.

🙃Meme1: I was sitting in my science class, when the teacher commented that the next day would be the shortest day of the year. My lab partner became visibly excited, cheering and clapping. I explained to her that the amount of daylight changes, not the actual amount of time. Needless to say, she was very disappointed.

🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: That reminds me of the anecdote about the person who complained that daylight saving time was causing the sun to burn her lawn. I don't believe either, heck, any of these idiot sighting tales are for real.

😏🤡Memes2&4: IDIOT SIGHTING #4:




🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: *Sigh* Another one.

🙃😏😼🤡👺🤥😈💩Memes: My daughter went to a

🙃😏😼🤡💩Memes1/4&6:: local

🙃😼🤡👺💩Memes1&3/6: Taco Bell

🤡Meme4: Kentucky Fried

👺Meme5: Mexican takeaway

🙃😏😼🤡👺🤥😈💩Memes: and ordered

🙃😏😼👺💩Memes1/3, 5&6: a taco.

🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: *Rolling eyes* Again, gotta like totally make out as if people who work at fast-food places must be idiots. *Scowl*

🙃Meme1: She asked the

🙃Meme1: individual

😼Meme3: counter

😏😼🤡👺💩Memes2/4&6: person

🙃😏🤡👺💩Memes1, 2, 4&6: behind the counter

🙃😏😼🤡👺🤥😈💩Memes: for ‘"'minimal lettuce.'"’

🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: Well that's a bit dorky, what if the person behind the counter wasn't all that great at English? She could've said "Don't put too much lettuce on it." or "Only a little, not too much lettuce."

🙃😏😼🤡👺🤥😈💩Memes: He said he was sorry, but they only had

🙃😼🤡👺💩Memes1&3/6: iceberg

😏Meme2: iceburg

😏😼🤡👺💩Memes2/4&6: lettuce.

🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: I repeat, not counting that mutation 2 misspells "iceberg", maybe this isn't idiocy, maybe it's not knowing the English language all that well. There are a lot of people with broken English on counter duty in places like that. This just isn't all that funny, really.

😏Meme2: From Kansas City

👺Meme5: From Castle Hill, Sydney .......

💩Meme6: From Winnipeg, Manitoba

🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: Why would so many people behind the counters of so many Taco Bells/KFCs/Mexican takeaways, from Kansas USA to Manitoba Canada to Castle Hill, Sydney Australia, from 2007 to the present time, all make that very same lettuce blunder?

See? This isn't a real event. It's just a contrived joke, like all the others in this list of supposed "idiot sightings"


🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: Let me guess, anyone who believes this chain letter as true and thinks it's totally hilarious.

So not me.

🙃Meme1: Police in Radnor, Pennsylvania, interrogated a suspect by placing a metal colander on his head and connecting it with wires to a photocopy machine. The message "He's lying" was placed in the copier, and police pressed the copy button each time they thought the suspect was telling a lie. Believing the "lie detector" was working, the suspect confessed.

🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: Prove it. You didn't even detail what kind of a crime it was. Anyway, this might fly on TV, and the police are known to pull tricks to get confessions in real life, but this story is pretty underwhelming. No hardee-har-hars from me.

😏🤡Memes2&4: IDIOT SIGHTING #5:



😏😼🤡👺💩Memes2/4&6: I was at the airport, checking in at the gate when an

🤡Meme4: Irish

😏😼🤡👺💩Memes2/4&6: airport employee asked, ‘"'Has anyone put anything in your baggage without your knowledge?'"’ To which I replied, ‘"'If it was without my knowledge, how would I know?'"’ He smiled knowingly and nodded,

‘"'That's why we ask.'"’

🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: Huh? When was I supposed to laugh?

😏Meme2: Happened in Birmingham , AL .

🤡Meme4: Happened at Luton Airport…UK

👺Meme5: This happened at Melbourne Airport

💩Meme6: Happened in Toronto, Ontario

🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: So why are all these airports experiencing the same conversation loop? Boy, that idiot traveller must have one wicked mind-control superpower to make this happen all over the world.

😏🤡Memes2&4: IDIOT SIGHTING #6:



😏😼🤡👺💩Memes2/4&6: The

😏😼🤡💩Memes2/4&6: stoplight

👺Meme5: pedestrian light

😏😼🤡👺💩Memes2/4&6: on

😏🤡👺💩Memes2&4/6: the

😼Meme3: a

😏😼🤡👺💩Memes2/4&6: corner

😼Meme3: of the MSU campus

😏😼🤡💩Memes2/4&6: buzzes

👺Meme5: beeps

😏😼🤡👺💩Memes2/4&6: when it's safe to cross the street. I was crossing with an intellectually challenged coworker of mine. She asked if I knew what the

😏😼🤡💩Memes2/4&6: buzzer

👺Meme5: beeper

😏😼🤡👺💩Memes2/4&6: was for. I explained that it signals blind people when the light is red. Appalled, she responded, 'What on earth are blind people doing driving?!'

🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: Yeah, people sometimes say and do some dumbbell things when it comes to the blind, but this didn't really happen.

😏😼🤡👺💩Memes2/4&6: She

😏Meme2: was

🤡👺💩Memes4/6: is

😏😼🤡👺💩Memes2/6: a

😏Meme2: probation officer

🤡Meme4: Local County Council

👺💩Memes5&6: government

🤡👺💩Memes4/6: employee

😏😼🤡👺💩Memes2/4&6: in

😏Meme2: Wichita , KS

🤡Meme4: Harrow, Middlesex, UK….

👺Meme5: the Adelaide P.O. SA

💩Meme6: Montreal, P.Q.

🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: See? More friend of a friend stuff that just didn't really happen unless you can manage to convince me that you and this co-worker of yours had the very same conversation loop repeating in various locations around the world.



😏😼💩Memes2, 3&6: At a good-bye luncheon for an old and dear co-worker.

😏Meme2: She

😼💩Memes3&6: who

😏😼💩Memes2, 3&6: was leaving the company due to 'downsizing.' Our manager commented cheerfully, "'This is fun. We should do this more often.'" Not another word was spoken. We all just looked at each other with that deer-in-the-headlights stare.

🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: Yeah I could imagine.

😏Meme2: This was a lunch at Texas Instruments.

🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: Not likely.



😏😼💩Memes2, 3&6: I work with an individual who plugged her power strip back into itself and

😏Meme2: for the sake of her life,

😏😼💩Memes2, 3&6: couldn't understand why her system would not turn on.

🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: Everybody does dumb things like that once in a while. And yes, it's hilarious when it really happens. Not so much in the form of some viral joke that just keeps going around, claiming to be from this or that place so you know it isn't actually a real account, just some jerk trying too hard to make you laugh and share.

😏Meme2: A deputy with the Dallas County Sheriffs office, no less.

🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: If you say so.





😏😼🤡👺💩Memes2/4&6: When my husband and I arrived at

😏😼💩Memes2, 3&6: an automobile

👺Meme5: a car

😏😼👺💩Memes2, 3, 5&6: dealer ship

🤡Meme4: our Local Ford dealer

😏😼🤡👺💩Memes2/4&6: to pick up our car,

👺Meme5: after a service,

😏Meme2: we were told the keys had been locked in it. We went to the service department and found a mechanic working feverishly to unlock the drivers side door. As I watched from the passenger side, I instinctively tried the door handle and discovered that it was unlocked. ‘"'Hey,'"’ I announced to the

😏😼Memes2&3: technician,

🤡Meme4: fitter/mechanic,

😏🤡👺Memes2, 4&5: ‘"'its

💩Meme6: it’s

😼Meme3: this door is

😏😼🤡👺💩Memes2/4&6: open!'"’"’ His reply,: ‘"'I know. I already

😏😼💩Memes2, 3&6: got

🤡👺Memes4&5: did

😏😼🤡👺💩Memes2/4&6: that side.'"’

🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: Yeah right.

😏😼🤡💩Memes2/4&6: This was at the Ford dealership in

😏Meme2: Canton , MS .

🤡Meme4: St Albans,Hertfordshire UK…..

👺Meme5: Holden Dealership Townsville Qld

💩Meme6: Guelph, Ontario

🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: This is starting to look like a weird sort of idiot mind-meld or something. :p

😏😼🤡👺💩Memes2/4&6: STAY ALERT!

🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: Alert enough not to be an idiot for this chain.

😏😼🤡👺💩Memes2/4&6: They walk among us......…...!...

🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: And they originate and spread chain letters.

😏🤡💩Memes2, 4&6: and the scary part is that

🤡💩Memes4&6: is

😏🤡💩Memes2, 4&6:they

🤡💩Memes4&6: have the RIGHT TO

😏🤡💩Memes2, 4&6: VOTE and

😏Meme2: they

😏🤡💩Memes2, 4&6: REPRODUCE.

🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: No fears of the ones in those silly stories reproducing since they don't really exist, and all this stuff never really happened, much less in the exact same way at the same places, at any time.

The real idiots that should be cause for concern are fanatics.


Now for the mutations of the "truths" which will be differentiated by headings "Chain5A" and "Chain5B" "Chains5" will indicate where the mutations are the same.


😈Meme5B: Very interesting, Scientifically proven....................

🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: That there are idiots among us? You don't need science to figure that out.

🤥Meme5A: 6

😈Meme5B: Six

👺🤥😈Memes5A&B: Truths

🤥Meme5A: Of

😈Meme5B: in

👺🤥😈Memes5A&b: Life

🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: Actually they're not "truths" just silly ideas, and not applicable to all life.

👺🤥😈Memes5A&b: 1. You cannot

🤥Meme5A: touch all your teeth with your tongue.

🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: This is true, if you don't have any teeth. However, if you do have teeth, depending on how flexible your tongue is, you can touch them all, in fact, when you close your mouth very tightly, your tongue can and does touch all of your teeth at once. So there goes that idea, right out the window.

😈Meme5B: stick your tongue out and look up at the ceiling at the same time it's a physical impossibility.

🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: Bull. And I'm not about to try it and look like an idiot.

👺🤥😈Memes5A&b: 2. All idiots, after reading

🤥Meme5A: the first truth,

😈Meme5B: #1,

👺🤥😈Memes5A&b: will try it.

🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: I didn't, because I've known a long time what my own tongue and teeth can do. And yeah, if you stick your tongue out and look up at the ceiling, you would definitely look like an idiot. But I guess that was the whole idea, wasn't it? Way to go, trying to make someone act and look, and ultimately feel like an idiot. What a jerk...

👺🤥😈Memes5A&b: 3. And discover that

🤥Meme5A: the first truth

😈Meme5B: #1

👺🤥😈Memes5A&b: is a lie.

🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: In which case, it isn't a truth at all, which makes your title with the number 6 in it a lie. And people wonder why I'm always telling them not to believe chain letters...

👺🤥😈Memes5A&b: 4.

🤥Meme5A: You're

😈Meme5B: You are

👺🤥😈Memes5A&b: smiling now because

🤥Meme5A: you're

😈Meme5B: You are

👺🤥😈Memes5A&b: an idiot.

🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: No, I'm rolling my eyes at you, because you're a twit...

👺🤥😈Memes5A&b: 5. You soon will

😈Meme5B: Copy and

👺🤥😈Memes5A&b: forward this to another idiot.

🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: Wrong again. I'll mangle this and let it bleed out in Cyberspace, because you are an idiot.

👺🤥😈Memes5A&b: 6.

🤥Meme5A: There's

😈Meme5B: There is

👺🤥😈Memes5A&b: still a stupid smile on your face

🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: Wrong again, stupid. *throws computer charging power cord at chain originator, along with a mean scowl* Oops, did I just knock out a few of your teeth?

😈Meme5B: Time for a good rum.

🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: No thanks, not the real stuff anyway.

Over and out.


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