If you've been on the net even a short time, chances are you have seen and even participated in a random questionaire meme chain letter. They sometimes come with titles like "Getting To Know You" or "Survey" and they consist of very easy questions, many of which crop up again and again on various mutations of this sort of chain.
Some of these meme surveys give you instructions like:
😏Meme: USING ONLY ONE WORD Not as easy as you might think! Now forward, change the answers to suit you and pass it on. It's really hard to only use one word answers.
🧝♀️Ocean Elf: Especially when that same chain includes this or a similar question:
Five people who email me regularly?
Four people I think will respond
🧝♀️Ocean Elf: No kidding, those questions which obviously require more than a one-word answer, were right there, in the one-word answer meme.
They almost always include this demand or something similarly phrased:
😏Meme: Be sure to send back to the person you received it from!
🧝♀️Ocean Elf: And they tend to be very redundant with these demands, telling you over and over, at the beginning and the end to:
😏Meme: Here's what you are supposed to do...and please don't spoil the fun...
🧝♀️Ocean Elf: But spoiling the fun is exactly what these chain letters do, because of their very nature as virals demanding to be spread around.
😏Meme: Okay, here's what you're supposed to do. Copy (not forward) this entire e-mail and paste onto a new e-mail that you will send. Change all of the answers so that they apply to YOU. Then, send this to a whole bunch of people you know *INCLUDING* the person who sent it to you.
🧝♀️Ocean Elf: I'm not going to spam everybody with this stuff...
😏Meme: The theory is that you learn a lot of little known facts about your friends and family.
🧝♀️Ocean Elf: It's only a theory, and not even a good one. Who's going to remember all that pointless random stuff, especially when so many people churn out their answers to all of these absolutely trivial, pointless, and even uninteresting questions, again and again?
😏Meme: Hit 'forward,' delete my answers, type in your answers and send it to a bunch of people, including me.
🧝♀️Ocean Elf: Redundancy...
😏Meme: It's fun and easy.
🧝♀️Ocean Elf: Easy, yes. Fun? Well, maybe fun to fill in the answers when you get something like this for the first time, but after about 10,000,000 of these never-ending random questionaire chains showing up, with many of the same questions borrowed from one survey and put into another mutation with a few additional other questions and on and on, it gets to be anything but fun.
😏Meme: **Remember to send it back to the person who sent it to you.**
🧝♀️Ocean Elf: Argh! When the net slows to a crawl and servers refuse to work to their capacity, blame it on people continuing to clutter it all up by sending and resending copies of this junk!
For anyone who, by some unusual good fortune, has not yet received or seen one of these things yet during their online life, let's expose and mangle this meme once and for all. The questions are often numbered, but not in this example, because more questions will be added with mangling answers as they cross my monitor.
&&& The meme also comes in the form of a bucket list, of all things...
😏Meme: A Bucket List
🧝♀️Ocean Elf: A - what? How does this in any way resemble a bucket? Unless you want to count the one I need when I see people cluttering my inbox or their blogs with this junk...?
I don't believe in bucket lists., and wish this annoying craze would kick the bucket.
😏Meme: Hit forward and place an x by all the things you've done and remove the x from the ones you have not, and send it to your friends (including me).
🧝♀️Ocean Elf: No, and you're not my friend...
😏Meme: Whether you've done this before, be a good sport and do it again!
🧝♀️Ocean Elf: Coercive crap! So if one doesn't do it again, even if they've been ultra-nice-person and put up with having to do it a million times for their clued-out friends before, they're not a good sport if they refuse? Oh, shut it already! 😏Meme: This is your life: 🧝♀️Ocean Elf: So what of it?
😏Meme: (X )Shot a shot gun
🧝♀️Ocean Elf: At chain letter originators in my fantasies...
😏Meme: ( X) Gone on a blind date
🧝♀️Ocean Elf: Only in your dreams, since you chain freaks seem to be so obsessed with dating.
😏Meme: (X) Skipped school
🧝♀️Ocean Elf: Depends on what you mean by skip. They do have skipping ropes in school, you know...
😏Meme: ( X ) Watched someone die
🧝♀️Ocean Elf: Only on TV.
Then comes a lot of ultra-boring xmarks concerning where you've been on your travels, basically naming several known world destinations, but removing all the 's'x, the list this chain letter rattles off goes like this:
😏Meme: (X) Visited Canada Alaska Cuba Europe South America Las Vegas Mexico Florida Seen the Grand Canyon Traveled to the opposite side of the country. Washington, DC Africa
🧝♀️Ocean Elf: Well it's no one's concern where I have or haven't been and I don't give a crap where anybody else has or hasn't been either.
😏Meme: (X) Flown on a plane
🧝♀️Ocean Elf: You generally have to do that to go really really long distances...
😏Meme: (X) Swam in the Ocean
🧝♀️Ocean Elf: I can swim, I have been at an ocean, does that count?
😏Meme: (x ) Served on a Jury
🧝♀️Ocean Elf: In a fictional sense...
😏Meme: (X) Been lost
🧝♀️Ocean Elf: Not lately...
😏Meme: (X) Cried yourself to sleep
🧝♀️Ocean Elf: I am capable of sleep, laughing, crying, and any combo of these...
😏Meme: (X) Played Cops and Robbers
🧝♀️Ocean Elf: Erm, not lately...
😏Meme: ( X ) Played Cowboys and Indians
🧝♀️Ocean Elf: Again, not lately.
😏Meme: (X ) Recently colored with crayons
🧝♀️Ocean Elf: Uh, not exactly...
😏Meme: (X ) Sang Karaoke
🧝♀️Ocean Elf: Not in a physical sense.
😏Meme: (X ) Paid for a meal with coins only
🧝♀️Ocean Elf: Huh? What's it to you? It's all money, isn't it? I pay with whatever money's handy, coins, bills, whatever, I mean, you just don't keep track of such silly stuff.
😏Meme: (X) Made prank phone calls
🧝♀️Ocean Elf: Um, like, not lately, pal, maybe that's your thing...
😏Meme: (X) Laughed until some beverage came out of your nose
🧝♀️Ocean Elf: Erm, well, I am capable of laughter, and pretty hard laughter at that. But I - well, you see - I don't exactly keep track of stuff like that.
😏Meme: (X) Caught a snowflake on your tongue
🧝♀️Ocean Elf: Many times. But that would be more than one, not just "a" snowflake.
😏Meme: ( X ) Danced in the rain
🧝♀️Ocean Elf: Um no. There are things I like to do when it's raining, but dancing generally isn't one of them.
😏Meme: (X) Written a letter to Santa Claus
🧝♀️Ocean Elf: Yes, if online counts...
😏Meme: (X) Kissed under the mistletoe
🧝♀️Ocean Elf: Hmmmm, I really don't remember. Nothing mushy, though, it would've been at some party when I was a kid.
😏Meme: ( X ) Loved someone who broke your heart
🧝♀️Ocean Elf: Whether or not, why would I tell YOU?
😏Meme: (X) Watched the sunrise with someone
🧝♀️Ocean Elf: Rise with whom? I don't know anyone who can actually do that - rise with the sun! That would be something to put in the Guinness Book for sure!
😏Meme: (X) Blown bubbles
🧝♀️Ocean Elf: Uh, who hasn't at one time in their life? I mean, it's a pretty common and fun thing for little kids to do out in the summer time.
😏Meme: ( X ) Gone ice skating skiing or snow boarding
🧝♀️Ocean Elf: Yes and no.
😏Meme: (X) Camped out under the stars
🧝♀️Ocean Elf: Not lately.
😏Meme: (X) Seen something so beautiful that it took your breath away
🧝♀️Ocean Elf: Many times.
😏Meme: (X) Been married
🧝♀️Ocean Elf: Um, you're seriously asking me this?
😏Meme: (X..??? almost) Have children
🧝♀️Ocean Elf: Not even close, pal...
😏Meme: (X) Had a pet
🧝♀️Ocean Elf: Had, and have.
😏Meme: ( X) Been skinny-dipping outdoors
🧝♀️Ocean Elf: Not that it's any of your business, but NO, of course NOT! Not outdoors or indoors either, for that matter - unless you want to count taking a bath or shower.
😏Meme: (X) Been fishing boating Water Skiing Hiking camping in a trailer/RV camping in a tent
🧝♀️Ocean Elf: Not recently, but yes.
😏Meme: (x ) Flown in a small 4-seater airplane glider helicopter hot air balloon
🧝♀️Ocean Elf: Yes and no.
😏Meme: (x ) Driven a Motorcycle
🧝♀️Ocean Elf: No, not exactly.
😏Meme: (x ) Been bungee-jumping
🧝♀️Ocean Elf: Not even close.
😏Meme: (X) Gone to a drive-in movie
🧝♀️Ocean Elf: I don't think so...
😏Meme: (x ) Done something that should have killed you?
🧝♀️Ocean Elf: Didn't you just cover that with the bungee jumping thing?
😏Meme: (X) Done something that you will regret (feel sad about) for the rest of your life.
🧝♀️Ocean Elf: If I did or didn't, why would I tell you?
😏Meme: (x ) Rode an elephant
🧝♀️Ocean Elf: Touched them at least.
(X) Eaten just cookies for dinner
🧝♀️Ocean Elf: What does that matter to you? I might or might not have at some point, it all depends on how hunggry I am.
😏Meme: (X) Been on T.V.
🧝♀️Ocean Elf: Yes, but not in anything huge, let alone anything you'd know about.
😏Meme: (x ) Steal any traffic signs
🧝♀️Ocean Elf: Wha? WHY would I do that!? Oh, right, that's your thing...
😏Meme: (X) Been in a car accident
🧝♀️Ocean Elf: Not lately, thank God.
😏Meme: (x ) Bailed out of Helicopter/Plane
🧝♀️Ocean Elf: Uh, no...
😏Meme: (x ) Went Curling
🧝♀️Ocean Elf: Nope, watched it on TV.
😏Meme: (x )Have a tattoo?
🧝♀️Ocean Elf: Only when it's henna.
😏Meme: (X) body Piercing? (includes ears)
🧝♀️Ocean Elf: Not that it matters to you or anything, but, no, no, and, NO! I don't require a so-called improvement in my appearance, and I don't believe in improvement through pain and sticking stuff through myself.
😏Meme: WHAT COLOR ARE YOUR KITCHEN PLATES?
🧝♀️Ocean Elf: Who cares?
😏Meme: LIVING ARRANGEMENT
🧝♀️Ocean Elf: Yes, I do live somewhere...
😏Meme: What room are you in?
🧝♀️Ocean Elf: A room with a computer, no kidding.
😏Meme: WHAT IS ON THE WALLS OF YOUR ROOM?
🧝♀️Ocean Elf: The same sorts of things that are found on anybody's walls, you know, like paint, pictures etc.
😏Meme: WHAT BOOK ARE YOU CURRENTLY READING?
🧝♀️Ocean Elf: Not currently reading a book. I can't do that and mangle this chain at the same time.
😏Meme: WHAT'S ON YOUR MOUSE PAD?
🧝♀️Ocean Elf: No mouse pad here, or it would probably be, oh, i dunno, a mouse...!
😏Meme: DO YOU TYPE WITH YOUR FINGERS ON THE RIGHT KEYS?
🧝♀️Ocean Elf: Why, does it show when you get it on the other end of the connection? Thought not. So what?
😏Meme: ARE YOU A LEFTY, RIGHTY OR AMBIDEXTROUS?
🧝♀️Ocean Elf: That all depends on what I'm doing.
😏Meme: WHAT SCREEN SAVER IS ON YOUR COMPUTER NOW:
🧝♀️Ocean Elf: Meh, like I should've noticed?
😏Meme: Where is your cell phone?
🧝♀️Ocean Elf: No, you can't borrow it...
😏Meme: HOW MANY RINGS BEFORE YOU ANSWER THE PHONE?
🧝♀️Ocean Elf: That depends on whether or not I feel like answering the phone.
😏Meme: Your hobby?
🧝♀️Ocean Elf: Besides mangling chain letters? Well... I have a few.
😏Meme: Your favorite thing?
🧝♀️Ocean Elf: I have lots of favorite things, can't pick just one.
😏Meme: WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE BOARD GAME?
🧝♀️Ocean Elf: Eh - I think there's one in existance somewhere...
😏Meme: FAVORITE MAGAZINE?
🧝♀️Ocean Elf: Uh, no...
😏Meme: Favorite book?
🧝♀️Ocean Elf: Don't have just one.
😏Meme: FAVORITE SMELL?
🧝♀️Ocean Elf: Mmmmmm, yeah. But chances are good it's different from your favorite.
😏Meme: LEAST FAVORITE SMELL?
🧝♀️Ocean Elf: That didn't even make sense. There's nothing "favorite" even when the word "least" comes before it in the smell department. There are simply some smells I absolutely HATE to the point of getting stressed, scared, sick. They would be called most hated or worst smells.
😏Meme: WHAT DO YOU THINK ABOUT OUIJA BOARDS?
🧝♀️Ocean Elf: I don't...
😏Meme: WHAT IS THE FIRST THING YOU THINK OF WHEN YOU WAKE UP IN THE MORNING?
🧝♀️Ocean Elf: Think? I'm trying to wake up! Whatever thoughts I might have at that time, like I'm going to try to analyze and keep a record of them? Please!
😏Meme: WHAT'S YOUR FAVORITE COLOR?
🧝♀️Ocean Elf: Doesn't matter all that much to me...
😏Meme: LEAST FAVORITE COLOR?
🧝♀️Ocean Elf: Whatever...
😏Meme: WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE NUMBER?
🧝♀️Ocean Elf: It varies.
😏Meme: Your mood?
🧝♀️Ocean Elf: What about it?
😏Meme: Missing someone?
🧝♀️Ocean Elf: Friends and some relatives I haven't seen in a while.
😏Meme: WORST FEELING IN THE WORLD:
🧝♀️Ocean Elf: It's a tie between several negative emotions.
😏Meme: BEST FEELING IN THE WORLD:
🧝♀️Ocean Elf: Anything in the extreme positive, naturally.
😏Meme: When is the last time you cried?
🧝♀️Ocean Elf: The last time something moved me to tears.
😏Meme: FAVORITE FOODS:
🧝♀️Ocean Elf: Yes, I have favorites.
😏Meme: DO YOU EAT THE STEMS OF BROCCOLI?
🧝♀️Ocean Elf: Broccoli? Seriously? You're asking me this?
😏Meme: KETCHUP OR MUSTARD?
🧝♀️Ocean Elf: Blech.
😏Meme: HAMBURGERS OR HOT DOGS?
🧝♀️Ocean Elf: Yeah, I like them both, and usually prefer one over the other, but my choice depends on some variables too. There are times when my usual favorite isn't a favorite at one place but it's great at another.
😏Meme: Muffins? Bagel cart?
🧝♀️Ocean Elf: No thanks...
😏Meme: CHOCOLATE OR VANILLA?
🧝♀️Ocean Elf: *YAWN!* Who says you have to choose one anyway?
😏Meme: Favorite dessert?
🧝♀️Ocean Elf: Depends on where and what's on hand.
😏Meme: IS THE GLASS HALF FULL OR HALF EMPTY?
🧝♀️Ocean Elf: *SIGH!* Just call it "half a glass of" whatever and be done with it.
🧝♀️Ocean Elf: Yeah, can't live without drinking, just like anyone else.
😏Meme: favorite drink?
🧝♀️Ocean Elf: Yes, but I don't know if it's the same as yours. Probably not.
😏Meme: FAVORITE ALCOHOLIC DRINK?
🧝♀️Ocean Elf: Not...
😏Meme: WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE SNAPPLE?
🧝♀️Ocean Elf: Ehh - I have no idea.
😏Meme: WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE SOFT DRINK?
🧝♀️Ocean Elf: None unless the carbonation is removed, or not put in in the first place.
😏Meme: DO YOU LIKE TO DRIVE?
🧝♀️Ocean Elf: Um...Not exactly applicable...
😏Meme: DO YOU LIKE TO DRIVE FAST?
🧝♀️Ocean Elf: Ehhh, and you're asking me this because?
😏Meme: WHAT WAS YOUR FIRST CAR?
🧝♀️Ocean Elf: Not...
😏Meme: Your car?
🧝♀️Ocean Elf: What car?
😏Meme: Do you drive a 2-door or 4-door vehicle?
🧝♀️Ocean Elf: Why are you so obsessed with what people drive?
😏Meme: T V ?
🧝♀️Ocean Elf: Yes.
😏Meme: FAVORITE TV SHOW?
🧝♀️Ocean Elf: A few and I can't name just one as a favorite, so I won't.
😏Meme: FAVORITE SOUNDTRACK:
🧝♀️Ocean Elf: Can't pick just one.
😏Meme: Where do you go to over and over?
🧝♀️Ocean Elf: If you don't know that, you don't know me.
😏Meme: My favorite place to eat?
🧝♀️Ocean Elf: I don't know what yours is, but as for me, well, it all depends on what I want.
😏Meme: Favorite place I'd like to be at right now?
🧝♀️Ocean Elf: Again, I don't know about you, but I can't pick one, and wouldn't tell you anyway.
😏Meme: Wish list item?
🧝♀️Ocean Elf: Doesn't matter, it's nothing you can give me.
😏Meme: Your favorite store?
🧝♀️Ocean Elf: Depends on what I want to buy.
😏Meme: DO YOU SLEEP WITH A STUFFED ANIMAL?
🧝♀️Ocean Elf: Um, what does that matter to you?
😏Meme: Where were you last night?
🧝♀️Ocean Elf: Somewhere you probably weren't.
😏Meme: Your dream last night?
🧝♀️Ocean Elf: Don't remember, and even if I did, I wouldn't tell you.
😏Meme: Last thing you did?
🧝♀️Ocean Elf: Besides mangling this chain letter, that all depends on whenever you read this post.
😏Meme: STORMS - COOL OR SCARY?
🧝♀️Ocean Elf: Cool, if the originator of these never-ending chain letter meme surveys get caught in them...
😏Meme: ROLLER COASTER - SCARY OR EXCITING?
🧝♀️Ocean Elf: Why, do you wanna go on one with me?
😏Meme: IF YOU COULD MEET ONE PERSON (LIVING OR DECEASED)
🧝♀️Ocean Elf: Too many to mention, can't just pick one.
😏Meme: IF YOU COULD MEET ONE PERSON DEAD OR ALIVE
🧝♀️Ocean Elf: See above.
😏Meme: WHAT IS YOUR SIGN & YOUR BIRTHDAY?
🧝♀️Ocean Elf: Sign: AqupicariTaureminicaleovirliscotariorn. Birthday: April 31!
😏Meme: What are you wearing?
🧝♀️Ocean Elf: Clothes of some sort, duh!
😏Meme: Something you're not wearing?
🧝♀️Ocean Elf: Jackboots and a dominatrix outfit.
😏Meme: Your hair?
🧝♀️Ocean Elf: What about it?
😏Meme: IF YOU COULD HAVE ANY COLOR HAIR, WHAT WOULD IT BE?
🧝♀️Ocean Elf: Whatever one I wanted, but I'm happy with mine the way it is.
😏Meme: IF YOU COULD DYE YOUR HAIR ANY COLOR, WHAT WOULD IT BE?
🧝♀️Ocean Elf: I probably could do that, but don't want to...
😏Meme: FAVORITE MOVIE?
🧝♀️Ocean Elf: Yeah, several.
😏Meme: FAVORITE MOVIES?
🧝♀️Ocean Elf: Yeah, several.
😏Meme: WHAT'S UNDER YOUR BED?
🧝♀️Ocean Elf: Nevermind prying, worry about what might be under your own, okay?
😏Meme: FAVORITE SPORT TO WATCH?
🧝♀️Ocean Elf: Yeah, there is one.
😏Meme: Your fear?
🧝♀️Ocean Elf: Like I'd tell you if I even had one or not, let alone what...
😏Meme: WHAT IS YOUR SINGLE BIGGEST FEAR?
🧝♀️Ocean Elf: No, you're not getting that out of me!
😏Meme: THE BEST PLACES YOU HAVE EVER BEEN?
🧝♀️Ocean Elf: Meh, I've had a lot of great experiences in different places. Can't exactly go into specifics.
😏Meme: Your mother?
🧝♀️Ocean Elf: I love her.
😏Meme: Your father?
🧝♀️Ocean Elf: I love him.
😏Meme: Your pets?
🧝♀️Ocean Elf: Love them.
😏Meme: HAVE YOU EVER BEEN IN LOVE?
🧝♀️Ocean Elf: Pry much?
😏Meme: Significant other?
🧝♀️Ocean Elf: Don't get your hopes up.
😏Meme: IF YOU COULD HAVE ANY JOB WHAT WOULD IT BE?
🧝♀️Ocean Elf: The one I have now is just fine!
😏Meme: Where do you want to be in 6 years
🧝♀️Ocean Elf: I don't believe in planning my life that far ahead but obviously I want a good future.
😏Meme: Where do you see yourself in 10 years
🧝♀️Ocean Elf: I don't see into the future.
😏Meme: FUTURE (or First) CHILD'S NAME?
🧝♀️Ocean Elf: Not applicable...
😏Meme: FUTURE DAUGHTER'S NAME:
🧝♀️Ocean Elf: Not applicable.
😏Meme: FUTURE SON'S NAME:
🧝♀️Ocean Elf: See above.
😏Meme: Your life? Only one word can describe it...
🧝♀️Ocean Elf: Life.
😏Meme: WHAT IS MOST IMPORTANT IN LIFE?
🧝♀️Ocean Elf: You'll have to decide that for yourself, I know what's most important in my own life.
😏Meme: Something that you aren't?
🧝♀️Ocean Elf: A chain letter originator or forwarder.
😏Meme: SAY ONE NICE THING ABOUT THE PERSON THAT SENT THIS TO YOU!
🧝♀️Ocean Elf: Oh now you're appealing to my desire to compliment my friends. I'll do that without this chain letter. I can't remember who among the numerous people on the net all caused this thing to cross my monitor over the years, so, really can't say. This thing has cropped up AN AWFUL LOT and it's time to mangle it.
😏Meme: Furthest place you will send this message?
🧝♀️Ocean Elf: I'd like to banish it to oblivion so no one could clutter the net by forwarding it, but it'll lie here, mangled.
😏Meme: Who will respond the fastest
🧝♀️Ocean Elf: Whoever reads this and makes a reply, preferably with their own mangling. Because I AM NOT sending it out to anyone and hoping for a response consisting of another bunch of pointless forgettable answers.
😏Meme: Who will resend this?
🧝♀️Ocean Elf: Not me, and I won't guess who's most likely or least likely to resend it, since this question and other similar ones asking me to speculate who I think will respond, resend, or won't, is really a very subtle dare to the readers/recipients of these memes to pass them on.
😏Meme: PERSON MOST LIKELY TO RESPOND?
🧝♀️Ocean Elf: No one. I'm not forwarding it anywhere, I'm mangling it, remember?
😏Meme: PERSON YOU SENT THIS TO WHO IS LEAST LIKELY TO RESPOND?
🧝♀️Ocean Elf: Am I typing too fast? I didn't send it TO ANYONE!
Memes are absolutely boring to read. they are being posted all over the place, via email, on web forums, and especially on blogs. It might be fun filling in these questionaires and talking about oneself, people never seem to get tired of doing these random, repeated, pointless questionaires, but really, who wants to read and especially get 'tagged' (forwarded) these questionnaires with more or less the same questions and instructions over again?
😏Meme: (1) What is your dream occupation?
🧝♀️Ocean Elf: Um didn't you already ask me that?
😏Meme: (2) What is the best dish that you can cook?
🧝♀️Ocean Elf: Nothing fancy.
😏Meme: (3) Have you ever been mentioned in the newspaper? What for?
🧝♀️Ocean Elf: Not lately, not that it matters.
😏Meme: (4) what’s the worst and/or most memorable job you’ve ever had?
🧝♀️Ocean Elf: Most memorable was also the best. Worst involved equipment in bad condition and/or people in bad moods.
😏Meme: (5) When you were a teenager, at what age did you envision yourself getting married? How old were you in reality when you got married?
🧝♀️Ocean Elf: Uh you're seriously asking me this?
😏Meme: (6) What’s your most hated household chore? What’s your favorite?
🧝♀️Ocean Elf: No favourite, most hated depends on how well or how quick it can get done.
😏Meme: (7) What’s your earliest memory?
🧝♀️Ocean Elf: Really can't say. Some of the stuff goes back further than I could consciously chronicle in any particular order.
😏Meme: I am passing this along to four lovely bloggies who I have just begun following—and adoring—this past summer and who I haven’t seen answer these Qs yet!!! If you’re not into this sort of thing, no worries.
🧝♀️Ocean Elf: Blech. The trouble with blog memes is they make blogs really boring. I've stopped reading blogs from people who do meme chains all or even some of the time.