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Krampus is the opposite of Santa, and he takes over where the naughty list leaves off. He’s basically the punisher of any “naughty” children. He has cloven hooves and horns like that of a goat, and a lawling tongue to let any unfortunate kids know he’d like to eat them.

Well, this stormy Ocean Elf does not like Krampus, so here’s how things go the year they meet.


Kibosh For Krampus

by Ocean Elf


It was a couple of days before Christmas, and Santa's last minute work was nearly done.

In the afternoon, he was just about to take a rest on the living room couch when there was the doorbell, then a sharp knock at the door, followed by someone singing:

"Jingle bells, Krampus smells, he won't get away! For the trouble he has caused, he will have to pay!"

Santa started, and chuckled as he made his way to answer the door.

"Merry Christmas, Hanima Of The Waves!" he greeted the Ocean Elf with a warm Santa hug, "Come on in!"

The elf thanked him and returned the greeting amid grateful laughter.

"What was that you were singing out there?" Santa asked as he motioned her to join him in the living room, "And can I get you anything to eat or drink?"

"As wonderful as that sounds, I don't think I have the time." the elf replied, looking serious. "I just found out about that rotten character called Krampus, and since he apparently spies on you so he can torture and kill naughty kids, and then he has the nerve to make as if you and he are partners somehow, which I do not believe for a second - I want to annihilate him. But - " the elf hesitated.

Santa's expression darkened at the mention of the demon Krampus. "You are the first one to ever propose such an idea, Hanima," he said quietly, "I can't do it myself, because my purpose is not to destroy anything or anyone, and, Krampus hexed his living quarters so that I would not be able to enter without losing my life, or so he has said in a letter to me. He also put that threat to anyone working with me to make Christmas merry for everyone, so even if someone else here had wanted to go, I would've had to disallow it to save their life."

"But he doesn't know about me, and as some people are ignorant enough to invite him into their Christmas holiday at all, that's where he gets his opportunities to try stealing and doing who knows what to their kids." said the elf. "I just don't know where his lair is. And, I know you don't like this kind of thing done until after Christmas, but this one really needs to get done before Christmas Eve."

"With my blessing, Ocean Elf." Santa replied warmly. At the elf's astonished and curious expression, he continued. "It was only because your last mission at Christmas was dealing with elves that I made that mandate. It doesn't apply to beings like Slender Man or Krampus. I only hope you know what you're doing and that you stay out of danger as much as possible."

"I'm sure I'll figure it out once I get there." said the elf. "A lot will depend on where I meet him and what's on hand to clobber him.

"Oh, I have just the thing for you to use against him at the very last moment." said Santa. He quickly went off to another room for a moment, and returned with a tiny container and handed it to the elf. "Don't use it prematurely or it may not work. This is a combination of holly and mistletoe berry juice."

The elf looked incredulous, almost as if she was cringing slightly.

Santa continued.

"When he has lost his magic or seeming super powers, is the best time to use it, although you might have to resort to it before that."

"Why mistletoe?" the elf asked.

"Because mistletoe is used for people to express love, something Krampus can't withstand, and that makes it toxic to him. How toxic will depend on how much hate and evil magic is coursing through his veins at the time it is applied. If you can manage to lose him some of that smugness, entitlement, cause him to become vulnerable in some way, then it will be at its full strength against him. Whether or not there is a clear indication of this will depend on him, but he won't admit defeat if he can help it.""

"Thank you. Now, I just have one question - where to find his base." said Ocean Elf.

I might know of someone who can help get you there." Santa took out his phone and made a call.

"Hello there, I have a question for you. Has Want done any toy-testing for us this year?"

There was a pause, then Santa laughed. "Good, good! Tell her to come up to my living room, I have someone for her to meet."

The Ocean Elf looked puzzled at this one-sided conversation.

"You mentioned ignorance before, and that reminded me of something. I assume you are familiar with Charles Dickens's 'A Christmas Carol'"

Ocean Elf's eyes lit up. "Yes!" And then something else dawned on her. "So that's what you were just talking about? Ignorance and Want, the two scary little kids that Christmas Present showed Scrooge before vanishing?"


The elf shuddered.

"Ignorance has been helping Krampus become more powerful. Want may know how to get you to Krampus's place. She and Ignorance do not get along. The more ignorant Ignorance is, the more Want wants."

The Ocean Elf couldn't help but laugh at this turn of phrase, but became serious again. "And this time the ignorance is about inviting demons and evil in as if it's some kind of harmless game."

Santa smiled at the elf and nodded. "Which causes want of common sense, mercy, and actual justice instead of the terrible things Krampus and Slender Man and their kind impose on innocent children."

"How did one or both of them find you?" asked the elf.

"After Christmas Present's time on earth was done, they were on their own until Krampus - "

Rapid footsteps were heard approaching, and in came a frightful looking little girl who, seeing the stranger with Santa, went up to her without any hesitation and looked her over with curious eyes beneath her characteristic scowl, and extended a scrawny hand to the elf..

Santa looked on quietly as Ocean also extended her hand to shake that of the little girl's, but there was uncertainty in her expression.

Although Want was bundled up in nice warm clothes instead of the ragged ones back in Scrooge's time, her hand was ice cold and features were s pathetic as ever.

"Well hello there, Want," Ocean finally said quietly, "How would you like to sit on my knee and warm up for a while."

Santa smiled broadly.

"I would like that." Want replied in a diminutive but rasping voice.

The elf leaned forward, took the tiny figure in her arms and held her tightly but gently on her lap, rocking back and forth as one might do to any distressed infant or small child.

The poor girl leaned against Ocean Elf, scowl giving way to a smooth brow and relieved expression.

Santa watched as the elf took the little girl's freezing hands in hers and massaged them, trying to warm them. Then the elf put one hand at the side of the frozen child's face and part caressed part massaged from forehead and cheek down to her chin and neck. She did likewise with the other side.

Want's expression showed tremendous relief at this and a ragged sigh escaped her.

"You've never experienced that before, have you?" Santa said to her. :Except from me and Mrs. Claus."

"I'm scared of most people, but she is safe and warm." Want replied.

"Since you've taken such a liking to Ocean Elf, would you care to help her out with taking down Krampus?" Santa asked.

Want shuddered violently in the elf's arms and drew in a sharp breath. But she soon recovered. "I will help."

"Ocean can't get there on her own."

"I can take her there, and bring her back." Want replied. "And we should get going before I get too comfortable and fall asleep here."

Ocean Elf laughed. "All right, now that you're sufficiently warmed up, let's hop to it." She stood up and put the little girl down in front of her.

"I'm glad you're going with me," said Want, "I'd like to stop him but it scares me too much when I'm by myself."

"This time, it is Krampus who will be running scared." the elf assured."

"Ho, ho, ho! Believe it. After all, she put an end to Slender Man." said Santa with a broad smile.

Want looked astonished. "That was you!?" she cried.

The elf laughed. "Yes, it was.

"Wow!" Want was apparently so delighted that the excitement brought color into her features at least for a little while. "I can't believe it!"

"Neither can I, ho, ho, ho!" Santa joined in. "I've never seen you actually get excited before."

"That's good!" Ocean Elf laughed, "But time's a wastin'."

"All the best of luck, and my thoughts and prayers go with you both." said Santa.

"Thank you." Ocean replied with a smile.

Want echoed the sentiment, and then reached up to take the elf's hand. "On a count of three. One...Two...Three!"

Santa's lovely scene vanished. It was replaced by a shabby complex with dark walls that looked like they were cobbled together with anything on hand, some brick, some concrete, some wood, all covered in grime.

Ocean scowled in disgust.

Want looked nervously around.

"Let's go." said Ocean, still holding the little girl's hand and starting to the right.

"I think the entrance is in the other direction." said Want.

"Ah, okay, let's give that a go." the elf said, then walked with the little girl in the other direction.

Sure enough, they came to a door and found themselves in a short hallway that led to other places in the building.

Want timidly informed the elf what each place was in the building as they passed it, and the whole time, the elf kept listening for sounds of activity. So far, no one was in sight, and it was a very dark and gloomy place on the whole.

As they reached the demented toy shop/storage area, they got a startling and unpleasant surprise.

"Raaaaaaaah!" Something cried as it jumped down from a shelf at them.

Want stifled a scream. The elf shuddered and glared.

It was another little kid, with the same sickly scrawny features as Want, but masculine, and his clothing was ragged and filthy.

"Who the heck are you?" The boy then startled, noticing the stranger.

"Hello there, Ignorance, that is your name, right?" the elf demanded.

"Huh? How do you know that?" he retorted.

"And you may call me Ocean." said the elf, and began making her way into the toy shop.

"Hey, where did you get those fancy clothes?" Ignorance jeered at Want.

"From Santa." she replied, retreating from him.

Ignorance guffawed. "Santa, eh? Why would he want to give anything to a little brat like you?"

Want's characteristic scowl returned. "If you'd give him a chance, you might find out for yourself." she said.

"Hah!" Ignorance rolled his eyes.

"Knock it off!" The elf raised her voice. "Want, I would like you to get to work on the toys. Take them apart, and - "

"Hey, you keep your mits out of Sir Krampus's things!" Ignorance warned.

"Sir Krampus my foot! Stop interrupting." Ocean demanded, fixing Ignorance with a stern gaze.

"And if I don't?" he countered.

"I wouldn't provoke her if I was you, Ignorance, this is the elf who destroyed Slender Man."

Ocean put a finger to her lips. "There isn't time for idle chit-chat - "

"Huh!? Wow, what a liar you are, Want, we don't get elves in here, and I might be ignorant, but even I can see she doesn't look like one of Santa's elves."

"And you don't look ignorant, Ignorance, you just look troublesome. But that's beside the point. Let's get this show on the road." said Ocean.

"Prove you're the one who killed Slendy." said Ignorance.

"I'm not here for that. Want, you may start from that bottom row over there." The elf indicated a shelf furthest from Ignorance as possible.

Want nodded and scuttled over to begin working on the possessed toys.

As Krampus seemed to be away at the time, and it was not Christmas Eve yet, the toys did not animate when disturbed.

The elf turned to deal with Ignorance just as he charged at her, intending to push and knock her off balance.

She caught him and lifted him up in the air. "I wouldn't try that again if I was you." she said.

Ignorance spat in her face.

The elf scowled in disgust and shook him.

"Oh! There is this glowing green little jewel orb thing in here!" Want exclaimed.

"great! That's what you should be looking for when you take those toys apart. Crush every one of those you can find."

"Aww! Can't I keep them?" Want begged.

"No, but if you do as I ask, I'll put in a good word about you to Santa, and you just never know, he might give you even prettier ones for Christmas." Ocean promised.

"Oh! I'd like that!"

"Then hop to it."

Ignorance kicked the elf, causing her to groan in pain and put him down. Then he bit her right thumb.

Ocean swore and bit him back, causing him to cry.

"What's going on?" Want asked, becoming frightened.

"He bit me, so I bit him back." Ocean said sharply.

Ignorance slapped at the elf, but he was so clumsy at it that it had very little effect other than a light tap.

The elf slapped him sharply a few times across the face, causing him to howl, mostly out of anger and wounded pride than pain.

"Anything you try to do to me, I do to you right back." the elf explained, as she fought to get her own composure back. "So you might as well stop.

But Ignorance wasn't through being difficult yet. Next, he stepped heavily on Ocean's foot.

The elf hissed, scowled, and returned the favour, but she held her foot down until Ignorance had to realize he was at her mercy.

He pleaded for her to let him go.

"Are you going to keep this up, or are you gonna listen to me from now on?" she asked.

"I'll listen!" he relented. "Let me go!"

"Magic word?" she prompted.

"Please!" he answered.

The elf lifted her foot, and looked sternly at the obstinate boy. "Now, you can either do as I instruct you to do and help me out, or you can stay out of the way, take your pick."

"He'll kill me." Ignorance suddenly burst into tears.

"Krampus? No, he won't." the elf assured the boy.

"Yes, he will!" Ignorance insisted.

The elf's expression softened. "Why are you so scared of him? Did he take you for being naughty one Christmas?"

"Yes!" Ignorance bawled.

Want had a sizeable pile of demolished toys and crushed orbs around her, and she was still adding to it, but what was taking place distracted her, and she looked over at Ignorance and Ocean.

The elf embraced the frightened boy and reassured him that she was here to free him, only he was going to have to be brave and help her out.

In the end, he agreed.

She released him with a pat on the back. "Now, here's what you need to do. Go to the stables and set all the reindeer loose. Set all the animals loose for that matter.

Ignorance shuddered. "Why?"

"So they will be free, and beyond his control." Ocean explained.

"Which ones?" Ignorance asked.

"All of them." the elf replied.

"But what are their names?" Ignorance knew them, but wanted to test Ocean's knowledge and be sure she really meant business.

"Slasher, Wrathful, Gorgon, Putrid,"

Ignorance suddenly broke into a big smile. "You do know!" he exclaimed.

The elf continued.

"Cyclops, Rabies, Goner, Blitzkrieg."

"No kidding!" Ignorance was astounded.

"Be sure to extinguish those flaming decorations on Blitzkrieg if they are there."

"How did you - "

"Never mind, just leg it, on the double!" The elf instructed.

"But aren't you and Want going to help me?" Ignorance asked, looking fearfully at Ocean.

"Want has her work cut out for her with these toys, and I have to get something else done in the meantime." the elf explained. "I'm not trying to scare you, but it's going to take all of us working at different things to get them done before Krampus gets back. Ignorance, you can come back and help Want with the rest of the toys once that's done, and you can both join me in that damnable torture chamber he's got set up."

"You're not going to torture us - are you?" Ignorance still didn't quite trust the elf.

"Her eyes went wide, astonished and dismayed. "Of course not!" she reassured him. "That's Krampus's thing, and it is why he's on my craplist. Now let's get moving."

The boy hurried out of the toy shop, and Want grinned.

"I hope he comes back soon," said Want timidly.

"He will." the elf reassured her, and left.

Want shuddered now that she was by herself in the large room. The sound of a chainsaw in the distance startled her badly, and she had to focus with all her might to keep working on the toys. Or what if the elf came back and became cross at them not being taken care of?

Ignorance didn't like Krampus's stinky stable at the best of times, and was afraid of large animals. So this was no easy task for him either. So first he opened the stable door that lead to the great outdoors, and hoped the reindeer would make for the door and leave, and not attack him.

Every stall door he opened, he would recoil back from as if the animal being released was sure to attack him.

After releasing them all, he flitted out of their as fast as he could!

He found Want still taking apart the toys and destroying the orbs, and she was near tears with fright. The sounds coming from the equipment room scared them both, and they had to stop what they were doing for a few seconds to look and make sure the other was still there.

Eventually there was no more noise.

In Krampus's torture chamber, the elf scowled in disgust, then doing a brief examination of the various whips, scourges and other devices, she set to work. One by one, then two by two, the whips were put through a chainsaw until the blades stopped working or something else went wrong with the saw's works so that it was useless. Then, a different saw was used on the remainder.

The elf cut up every bit of torture equipment that was possible to destroy by that method, and dismantled and smashed everything else with a savage ferocity.

She even went after the masks in the mask room.

By the time she was satisfied all had been rendered quite useless, she was out of breath and coughing, and the chamber was strewn with so much twisted metal, leather, bits of wood, bits of glass, paper, fabric, plastic and other materials that it looked like a scrapyard.

"Holy smokes!

The exclamation came from Ignorance, he and Want had finished with the toys and got to the torture chamber just in time to witness the elf tossing the last saw around and banging it against all sorts of broken up bits of equipment.

Walls, even the floor. The windows to the sitting room where some children had been forced to watch others being tortured, had all been smashed. The seating area off the chamber, also damaged beyond repair.

The elf came toward them, but she was seized by such a violent coughing fit that she couldn't articulate what she wanted done next.

"Why don't you take a bit of a rest?" Want suggested.

The elf obliged and knelt down just for a moment.

Want thumped her on the back, trying to ease the coughing fit.

Soon, the elf recovered, and standing back up quickly, she breathed, "Thank you... Now, the surveillance room."

The children followed the elf, who, despite being tired, carried on as quickly as ever, and soon they reached their destination.

It was filled with monitors lining one wall almost completely. A center monitor protruded out from the wall more than the others, with a chair and computer keyboard.

"Now, don't mind what you see on those screens, said the elf as she took her place in that chair, and did away with the search window, "look for every disk, memory stick, external hard drive and demolish them. I've got some work to do here."

So Ignorance and Want set about gleefully searching out and destroying every bit of stored information they could find.

The elf furiously punched in various keystrokes and commands until she hit the jackpot. The way to delete/clear everything off the computer and all its various monitors and attachments, and format everything all over.

One by one, the monitors went dark.

"Good! Oh, I wish I knew where there was a pair of scissors or wire cutters." she said.

"I know where there are some! Ignorance said, and quickly scuttled out. He came back shortly with wire cutters and scissors.

"Great. Use whatever you can to cut the cords of every screen that has gone dark." the elf said. "And Want, you continue to find and destroy his stash of programs, information etc."

It took a while for the main operation to complete, and when it did, and everything had been erased, the computer that once ran the whole elaborate system was shut down, the cord was cut, and then the elf threw every one of the machines down so the panes broke.

This left the surveillance room in as bad a state as the toy and torture rooms.

"One more area to go." said the elf.

"Oh, really?" Ignorance said incredulously.

"The kitchen, or dining area.

She left the surveillance room and ran down to the eating area, the two children in tow, not understanding why even this would fall to the elf's wrath.

She had already emptied the closet of the birch basket, and weird little boxes Krampus used for storing the orbs to be implanted into toys. All of these had been jumped on, trampled, and broken, and the elf was already smashing plates and bowls when the children caught up with her.

This time, both Want and Ignorance became too frightened to join in. They stood just outside the kitchen and dining area, watching the glowering elf furiously throw dishes everywhere, some of them hitting and breaking windows, others damaging the walls and making the grubby stove and fridge look even worse.

Sometimes the elf would utter exclamations of what sounded very much like triumph with particularly loud and ruinous crashes.

Just when the children thought she was through, with every last dish being thrown, the elf yanked out the cutlery drawer and threw the cutlery among the mess. She couldn't destroy that.

But she could mess up the furniture, and that's exactly what she did next. Drawers were taken out of cupboards and chairs were removed from their places. The table was overturned. Everything was thrown around so that chair legs fell off, drawers were marred, doors yanked off their hinges.

And then, the elf noticed the kitchen sink.

It reminded her she was thirsty. So having broken all the glassware, she simply turned on the tap just enough and drank straight from that.

Suddenly, they all heard a great angry roar from somewhere in the complex.

"Quick, outside!" Ignorance said in a loud harsh whisper, "He's back!"

Elf cut her drink short and joined her companions. They all hurried out the door.

Krampus had returned, and the first thing he did was go to the surveillance room to check for updated information on the naughty VS. nice lists.

He couldn't have been more shocked to find a disaster area. Even more infuriating was that everything had been broken. Nothing was untouched. This was sabotage.

"All that information, gone!"Krampus cussed and bellowed as he tromped through the mess, kicking computers and hard drives as he went.

Next, he checked out the torture chamber, and found it utterly ransacked.

"I can't believe this!" he shouted, foaming at the mouth.

He continued on until he found the kitchen and dining area in shambles.

"Who's responsible for this!?" the angry rasping man's voice bellowed.

"You two better go to Santa's." said the elf to the children as they found hiding places.

"Not without you, I'm not." said Want.

"You have to," said Ocean, "Ignorance will be the focus of Krampus's single-minded fury if he finds him."

The boy shuddered.

"I could take him to Santa' but I'm afraid of leaving you hear on your own." said Want.

"I'll be just fine." said the elf.

"I'm gonna kill you for this, Santa!"

"As if..." the Ocean Elf snickered.

Then, out the door came rampaging none other than Krampus himself.

He stopped short at the sight of the Ocean Elf. "Who are you?" he bellowed.

She glowered at him, too enraged to say anything.

"You tell me or I'll - "

A sharp pain entered his right side just beneath his rib cage. He buckled momentarily.

"You may call me Ocean, craphead!" the elf snapped tersely, loosing another elastic band on him.

For some strange reason, they really seemed to bother him. He cringed again, and let out a pained wheeze as the hit got him in the throat.

The elf charged straight up to him and shoved as hard as she could.

Krampus was not expecting this, so he fell over to one side.

The elf was on him, and working at his head. Furiously, she tore the mask off, and then pulled the horns back. They came right out of the part of the mask that was supposed to hold them in place.

Krampus roared with rage. "Get off me, you little - you - "

"The word you're looking for is elf." came the reply

"What? That's not possible!" he started to protest.

Before he realized what was happening, Ocean bent her head down toward his face and did something Krampus had done to escapee Eli Rockford and many children before and since. It was something that made everyone else recoil. With a grimace, the elf stuck her tongue out and licked one of Krampus's red eyelids.

"Eww!" Want and Ignorance chorused and recoiled, thoroughly grossed out, but Krampus's reaction was far more extreme.

"Aaaagh! Eww! Elf germs!" Krampus exclaimed, Utterly repulsed.

Ocean laughed. "Oh, that was worth it!"

Becoming nauseated for the first time in his poor excuse of a life, Krampus started writhing and screaming as if in pain. And then he became violently ill.

"Well, that's what you get for assaulting innocent children with your tongue. Not to mention your set of choppers later on and your - "

"Eww!" Krampus squealed and heaved again.

"Too bad it had to be taken to this extremity, but it's time you learned what it's like being touched by something you don't want anywhere near you!" the elf spat, and stood up, satisfied he was finally getting the message. "But I'm not through with you yet!"

"Eww!" Krampus cried piteously. "Santa! Somebody! Help me!"

His vision swam, his equilibrium was completely off. He tried to get up but only ended up drilling his head into the ground.

"Santa, help you?" the elf sneered as she strode over to a tree and yanked a branch off it. Then she called to the children, "He won't be going after you now. Go around the back of the building and I'll meet you there. You should not stick around to see what's about to happen."

"Why?" asked Ignorance.

"Is it going to get any more gross?" Want asked.

"Yes." Ocean replied.

Want obeyed, and left the scene. But Ignorance only pretended to leave. Instead, he found another place to hide where he could watch what happened.

The elf returned to Krampus. "This," she hit him on the head, "is for thinking you could exploit Santa's naughty list for your own personal gain, and this," she thwacked him again, "is for the dumbbell notion that you are somehow working in tandem with Santa, when you are far worse than any naughty list kid. "Another hit. "What makes you think you have the right to punish anyone when you are the worst of the lot!?"

Krampus screamed.

"This is for everyone you tortured and killed and ate!" The elf shouted with tears spilling down her face, and she unleashed a flurry of hits to various places on Krampus.

Ignorance watched in wide-eyed horror. He saw the elf go from controlled and calculating to glassy-eyed rage, screaming and sobbing. What was especially bizarre for Ignorance was seeing the complete turnabout on Krampus, who had up until this point, been the one calling the shots. But even Ignorance realized the difference between the two.

Krampus, no matter how violent he got, clearly enjoyed what suffering he inflicted on his victims.

What was seen from the elf was anything but joy. She looked like she was driven out of her mind with unspoken revulsion and rage against Krampus.

Ignorance had noticed the same sort of emotions from Krampus's victims too, only they showed one other emotion the elf did not - terror. That terror now belonged to Krampus himself.

Finally, the elf's rage was spent, and she took a few deep breaths to get herself under control, then stood by for some time, watching Krampus and drying her tears.

Krampus did not regain his strength or smugness again.

Because of the little boy's not being dressed for winter, the elf was not willing to wait too long for signs of Krampus's healing himself as had been done in the past according to Eli Rockford's journal.

The elf dropped the tree branch, then kneeled over Krampus. "Now, more children and their families will have a merry Christmas. You will not." she hissed in his ear.

With a grin, she took the tiny container Santa had given her from her coat pocket and poured the contents on Krampus's face.

The monster vanished with a scream, vaporizing into an icy blue cloud.

The elf went around the back of the building to collect the children, and Ignorance had to follow her without being seen, then pretend he had been back there with Want the entire time.

"The elf approached him and put a hand on his shoulder. "I'm sorry I had to get so rough with you back in the toy room."

"I should've been nicer to you." Ignorance replied.

They exchanged smiles.

Want transported all three back to Santa's place, where they celebrated the end of an evil-doer and a new beginning to the lives of two children, who became less ignorant and less want as they became more.


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