Oh, brother! This one really warrants a mangling. Who does he think I am? Melissa? Oh, honestly!
One mangle of a monumental email screw-up, coming right up.
First, a little history.
"I'm a nice guy, and that's what nice guys do."
*Cringe* That's what this guy always kept saying on an email list I had the misfortune to be on with him back in the fall of 2018. I only barely tolerated and tried so hard to be nice to him because I thought everybody else was totally cool with him, including the incredibly manipulative list mod who eventually killed the list, but that's another story.
He always annoyed and creeped me out. That quote above was a big part of it. And he was always seeming to be so starved for attention, like the list mod. The difference being he was just needy, while she was power-hungry plus needy. The two of them also had a history, which is probably why there was such a big clash when his birthday came up, and both of them acted so childish. He was annoying, she was frightening. So I was at my nicest to him then because it was his birthday, and she was really weirding me out with her terrible temper.
After that, however, I was done with them both.
But he refused to take the hint, no matter how I ignored his private emails.
He should've gotten the hint when I reacted to a post he made on an email list:
--
From: "Robin"
Subject: [the-chat-zone] Preferences
Date: December 19, 2018 at 11:34:52 PM MST
To: the-chat-zone@groups.io
Reply-To: the-chat-zone@groups.io
Hey EveryBody
Why did you Choose the MobilePhone that you did?
Personally, I'm Not Mobile Specific, but if I had to Choose between Google's Android & Apple's iOS, I would Definitely Choose: Samsung's Galaxy
Because I like My MobilePhones Like I Like My Lady & that is With Curves LOL HaHaHaHa LaughingOutLoud HaHaHaHa LOL
&
Samsung's Galaxy MobilePhones are the ONLY MobilePhones with Curved Edges
--
From: "Ocean Elf via Groups.Io"
Subject: Re: [the-chat-zone] Preferences
Date: December 19, 2018 at 11:48:53 PM MST
To: the-chat-zone@groups.io
Reply-To: the-chat-zone@groups.io
*Elf Scowls, turns and stalks out*
--
From: "Ocean Elf via Groups.Io"
Subject: Grrrrrr!
Date: December 19, 2018 at 11:58:20 PM MST
To: @groups.io
Reply-To: @groups.io
I am off The Chatzone for now. I'd rather not be there knowing Robin is anyway.
He put me off already back on SF, but when he responded to me a couple days ago on CZ, I was like "Oh boy, here we go again."
Thankfully he didn't press it when I wrote back to the others, but his stupid phone joke about liking his ladies with curves really did it! *Blazing stormy eyes*
That's why I took off out of there, and he will not get any response if he dares to email me privately, which he has done occasionally since the SF disasters.
Elf
--
And he still does send me emails. This last one really annoys me, so much that it provoked a mangling.
--
Header: From: Robin
Elf: *Cringe and rolling eyes* Gah.
Header: Subject: Blindness & Beauty: How Visually Impaired Women Are Changing an Industry That Ignored Them
Elf: *Facepalm* Oh, boo-hoo!
1. the whole chip on shoulder over being blind is Melissa's thing, not mine. Stop pulling the "We all got ignored because we're blind" crap! I don't play that!
2. I don't care about beauty.
Oh, but Robin, you do. After all, you like your mobile phones *and ladies (plural) with curves... *Scowl* Creep. That was a repulsive joke.
3. I'd love the beauty industry to butt out and stop telling people they don't look good enough in order to get them buying useless products in some attempt to look more "beautiful". The reason people have so many problems with self image today is precisely because the media and beauty industry keep ramming this crap down their throats, and so many people believe it.
Header: Date: April 4, 2019 at 9:36:36 PM MDT
To: ocean Elf
Elf: I didn't ask to receive this crud.
Email Article: Blindness & Beauty: How Visually Impaired Women Are Changing an Industry That Ignored Them
Elf: See the points above. I'm so sick of this whole genre of articles that make as if your life must suck if you have a disability in order to prop up some person or group or entity just because of disability.
Robin: Article Link:
https://www.allure.com/story/blind-women-beauty-industry-tactile-packaging-for-visually-impaired
Elf: Whatever the heck made you think emailing me something from a beauty mag would interest me? Oh, right...Blindness...OF COURSE!
*NOT!* I do not fixate on disability...!
Allure.com: Christine Ha swirls her foundation on with a brush, feeling precisely where its bristles kiss her skin.
Elf: Oh, gag me! The purple prose... It's making me sick.
Allure.com: She presses an eyelash curler  to her face, sensing its two pressure points on her cheekbone, and closes her eyes, trusting that her lashes are hovering between the hinges of its convex jaw. She clamps it shut.
Elf: Elsewhere, paint dries.
Yeah, I don't care about anybody's beauty regiment.
Allure.com: Next,
Elf: Oh, just end this already! You gave it away in the title, and this story is hardly riveting.
Allure.com: she positions a mascara wand near her lashes, inching it closer until the gentle tension of its stiff bristles lifts the tiny hairs.
Elf: who...Cares...?
Allure.com: Finally, she carefully traces the outline of her lips with a pencil and fills in the fleshy part with a creamy lipstick as one would smear on ChapStick.
Elf: The fact you even read this, Robin, gives me the creeps. I mean what did you get out of it? Why are you reading Allure.com articles anyway?
I get nothing but boredom and annoyance.
Allure.com: Ha is a chef (you may know her as a past MasterChef winner), she is an author, and she is blind.
Elf: I've seen some of her programs, and was always put off by the emphasis of her being "blind" in the intro to every show. It simply shouldn't matter.
Allure.com: Despite having only 20 percent of her vision (she can see shades of darkness), she has always loved makeup and often does her own for TV appearances.
Elf: Fine. And yes, you do have to get made up for TV or you look ghastly under the set lighting. This was explained to dance students by an instructor where I work. It makes sense. But it has nothing to do with the beauty industry.
Allure.com: But the beauty industry, which increasingly aims to cater to every creed and color, has largely ignored visually impaired people like Ha.
Elf: Oh, boy, here we go, boo-hoo-hoo, again with the sympathy-grab targeting the sighted world to make them feel bad for the blind, while telling the blind their lives must suck by default, gotta put in there that somewhere, some section of a world demographic got overlooked again because TADA! DISABILITY!
Oh, put a sock in it!
Allure.com: This is bizarre
Elf: No, this is emotionally manipulative crap and I'm pretty sure it's meant to lead to a promo of some line of beauty products or a certain company.
Bizarre is the glitch my phone had the other day.
Allure.com: when you consider that 36 million people worldwide are totally blind, and 217 million have moderate to severe visual impairment.
Elf: And how many in third world countries are going to want let alone afford your beauty products?
Stats are always changing anyway, so if you think tossing out some random big numbers is impressive, it is not.
Allure.com: âPeople think just because blind women canât see, they donât care about what they look like,â says Sam Latif, who was diagnosed with low vision at five years old due to a condition called retinitis pigmentosa, eventually losing her sight completely in early adulthood. âThey think that the visually impaired donât spend money on beauty products or canât apply makeup so theyâre not relevant to this industry.â
Elf: Well, believe it or not, there are women who are not hung up on beauty...
And if I didn't care what I looked like, I wouldn't care if my clothing was clean, or if it fit, or if it was otherwise decent to wear in public. Caring what you look like in the sense that it matters how you present yourself actually has nothing to do with trying to be "beautiful". It's why I will not go around in some skin-tight little dress that exposes too much of myself and makes me look like a hussy.
Allure.com: Fortunately, that notion is being challenged from the inside by people like Latif she is Procter & Gambleâs special consultant oon inclusive design, a new role that helps ensure products are designed, packaged, and advertised to be inclusive for the 1.3 billion people worldwide who have a disability.
Elf: Ah, there we have it, the ad!
Not interested.
Allure.com: Change is also coming thanks to the success of blind and visually impaired beauty bloggers, like YouTuber Molly Burke, who has 1.7 million subscribers, and
Elf: I don't give a flying hot dart about any beauty blogs, regardless of who produces them and I don't care who is blind and who is not. And I couldn't care less about how many subscribers any Youtube channel has and am fed up with that popularity obsession. Not to mention the crazy monetization program has caused so many otherwise great and interesting channels to beg for likes and subscribes in all of their videos. Argh
Allure.com: Lucy Edwards, CoverGirlâs first blind beauty ambassador.
Elf: Oh, for crying out loud, get over the blind thing!
Allure.com: âWhen I first lost my eyesight, I was quite sad that I couldnât look in the mirror. Applying makeup is a way that I can control my appearance again,â says Edwards, who lost her sight at the age of 17 due to a rare genetic disorder. âBut beauty means so much more to me. I love how the products make me feel when I apply them. I love the different smells, the different textures.â Now 22, Edwards taught herself to do makeup (eye shadow and all) with help from her sister and launched a YouTube channel. There she shares tutorials both simple (bronzer and brow tips) and extremely difficult, no matter how good your sight is (liquid liner with a perfect flick).
Elf: To each their own... "Beauty" bores me. I don't want or need it.
Allure.com: âI donât know what Ariana Grande looks like or what texturizing spray really does... they popped up on the scene after I lost my sight.â
Elf: *Facepalm! Headdesk!* Oh, for the love! Can anyone go for a full article without mentioning today's annoyingly trendy people? I'm sick of the lot of them - their names popping up everywhere! Not even Jeopardy is free of this cruft!
So somebody doesn't know what Ariana Grande looks like, boo-hoo, end of the world...
Oh please! Shut up!
I don't know and don't care and wish people would quit with all the AGiana Arande and Paty Kerry and Jeyonce and Bay-z etc. etc. Yes, I flubbed their names on purpose. All this over saturation in the media of these living memes just makes me more annoyed.
Allure.com:The visually impaired are used to putting extra thought into their routines they count the number of strokes per cheek to ensure eveenly blended blush or hold eye shadow brushes at the top so that they can more deftly guide them to the lid. Vlogger Burke and Life of a Blind Girl  blogger Holly Tuke swear by sample-size mascaras for better control (itâs easier to gauge angles and how close the wand is to the eye); My Blurred World  blogger Elin Williams uses clear mascara for lash definition without fear of blobs or smears.
Elf: Blah, blah, blah...
Allure.com: Maribel Ramirez, who teaches independent-living skills to blind women at the Braille Institute in California, tells students to refrigerate eyeliner, lipstick, and foundation so they can use its chilly temperature to better sense where theyâre applying it.
Elf: And if I cared about using cosmetics at all, that is the one and only truly interesting and helpful statement in this whole freaking article! Too bad it's buried in among all this other drivel.
Allure.com: âYou make adjustments, and it takes a lot of practice,â Tuke says, âbut after a while, it becomes muscle memory.â
Elf: A lot of things take muscle memory. Dance, playing a musical instrument, nobody has to tell me about muscle memory. Oh, and BTW, it sure as heck is not unique or exclusive to blind people. Just putting that out there.
Allure.com: Placement can be mastered, but what about inspiration, the engine that drives so much of our beauty routines? âI lost my vision over 10 years ago, so everything I envision is stuck in that time period, including my face and hair,â says Ha. She avidly consumes beauty articles for product news, while others, like Williams, listen to makeup tutorials to hear fresh color-combination ideas. âI donât know what Taylor Swift or Ariana Grande look like, and I donât know what texturizing spray really does, because they all popped up on the scene after I lost my sight,â Ha says. âBut I do remember what beachy waves are, so I can imagine something along those lines.â
Elf: Again with the Grande name-toss, and oh sure, why not toss Swaylor Tift in there as well! And how about having one person expand on the same script for some kind of attempt at making a super-impact? Gah, just end this already! I get it! I get it already, I get it! I just don't care.
Some of us find inspiration in other things besides trying to look "beautiful". If these people want to spend their time pouring over beauty blogs and mags, that's their thing. I'm not interested.
Allure.com: Which brings up a larger point: Even within the vision-loss community, the experience of beauty is vastly different.
Elf: That's because people are different, genius! Regardless of sight or blindness, by the way
Ugh, this article is killing my brain.
Allure.com: Most of the beauty vloggers mentioned in this article lived part of their lives with sight, and some can still detect light. Burke can no longer distinguish between colors after a rare retinal disease damaged her vision, but she remembers them (purple is her favorite) and can still see certain high-contrast things like the way glitter catches the light. Women who were born without sight, meanwhile, must devise their own notions of beauty, based on what they feel when they touch their faces (and the faces of others) and what they are told or read about.
Elf: Uh, no! Just, no!
Face-touching is out, unless you're touching your own, and I never do that out of a motivation of trying to be "beautiful".
Allure.com:Navigating beauty products without the ability to visually spot them is another challenge. Many blind beauty devotees can identify products just by feeling the tube or tub.
Elf: I've figured that out too, but you see, that skill is by no means limited to beauty products. You might want to put that out there as well.
Allure.com: In a video with beauty vlogger giant James Charles, Burke identifies nearly every product in his makeup collection as she feels them, almost all down to the brand and many by exact product name. But products that are less distinctive require tactile markers think Cellotape tags, elastic bands, or homemade Braille labels. Still, what a pain. âI work full-time; Iâve got three kids under nine. The last thing Iâve got time to do is put markings on my beauty products,â Latif says. âI try to memorize them by touch.â
Elf: Wake me up when this is over...
Allure.com: Inspired by her own struggles,
Elf: Ah yes, gotta really amp up the attempt at turning this into some kind of super-hero story, it's not just an inconvenience, it's "struggles" *Rolling eyes* good gosh, just stop!
Allure.com: she recently spearheaded a redesign  of Herbal Essences Bio:Renew shampoos and conditioners packaging to include tactile differentiators for the visually impaired. âIâve used my husbandâs hair gel thinking it was face wash. Iâve used a hair mask thinking it was a body lotion,â she says. âIâm sure Iâll carry on having those âwhoopsâ moments, but the more indicators there are that help me differentiate, the easier my life will be. Packaging can be made beautiful both for people who can see it and for people who canât. Itâs not beauty over accessibility: Itâs beauty times accessibility equals good for society. And good for business.â (The U.S. Department of Labor estimates that Americans with disabilities have a combined $175 billion in discretionary spending power.)
Elf: Another big promo. Another product I don't use. Besides, there is shopping online for shampoo and stuff, that way you know you're getting what you want.
More needs to be done to help with accessibility in the tech industry. Currently, only Apple has phones and tablets and computers with screen-readers built right in. All electronics companies should be requiring this if you want my opinion on that.
Allure.com: Herbal Essences is not the only brand to see the value in this way of thinking. LâOccitane has featured Braille on nearly 80 percent of its products since 1997 (and has teamed up with Orbis International, a nonprofit that provides eye care to developing nations, raising millions of dollars to fight preventable blindness).
Elf: That is always a good thing.
Allure.com: Bioderma includes Braille on its boxed packaging. Bath and body brand CleanLogic incorporates Braille on many of its products, and founder Isaac Shapiro, whose mother was blind, has started a nonprofit, Inspiration Foundation, that helps provide adaptive technology for adults with vision loss.
Elf: See, that is all you would've needed for this article. Just these two paragraphs, and the one earlier with the hint about cooling the cosmetics for easier application.
Allure.com: Farther afield, LâOréal Brazil launched an audio makeup pilot program to teach blind women how to use Maybelline products (the brand is a LâOréal subsidiary), and Shiseido has partnered with Google in Japan to create a prototype called Braille Nails tech that allows blind women to âseeeâ objects in their environment via a digitally coded press-on fingernail (it translates visuals into sound).
Elf: But not everyone likes press-on nails.
Allure.com: Smell can be a guide, too, says Williams, who favors Too Faced palettes for their distinctive, chocolaty scent.
Elf: Hmm. Never heard of it. Oh well, I'll survive.
Allure.com: "Itâs not beauty over accessibility: Itâs beauty times accessibility equals good for society. And good for business."
Elf: You already said that.
Allure.com: In a perfect world,
Elf: *Sigh* Must we do that old cliche again?
Allure.com: all products, even lip pencils and primer tubes, would feature Braille labeling, but the space it requires on packaging can be problematic.
Elf: Yes but there are other things besides braille. Programs on a smartphone can read printed information now.
Allure.com: Companies are looking at techy alternatives, including scannable codes that could link to audio-accessible shade and ingredient information.
Elf: That's already possible. Didn't I just mention something about programs on smart phones in the above? And it doesn't just apply to beauty products.
Allure.com: Still, the best decision any brand can make is simply to bring blind women into the conversation,
Elf: Without making such a big thing about blindness... Oh, and not just women either. People with all sorts of different needs/requirements that use any kind of product, really. No-brainer.
Allure.com: whether that means employing them or featuring them in advertising, says Edwards: âCoverGirl is really doing something by involving me in its brand. It may take time, but it will make a difference.â
Elf: Fine, but don't turn this into some kind of affirmative action scheme...
Allure.com: Itâs not just the beauty business that can learn from these women, but all of us.
Elf: Look, it's not just these women, people can learn from other people, end of story, thank you, now shut up already!
Allure.com: The way visually impaired women experience products thheir heightened appreciation for the way a cream gets absorbed, the creaminess or chalkiness of an eye shadow, or the ergonomic design of a mascara wand is profound.
Elf: No, it is not profound! It's a way of life for the people experiencing it, nothing more...
Profound is not making such a big deal about disability. Profound is seeing people for who they are and seeing themselves for who they are regardless of sight. Profound was Mother Theresa and Lady Diana and the impact they had on the lives they touched. Profound is when people are reunited after some life experience separated them and their chances of getting back in touch were very unlikely. Profound is something the beauty industry simply cannot touch.
Allure.com: Beauty rituals are a feast for all the senses.
Elf: And they are not for everyone...
Allure.com: And they also, crucially,
Elf: Stop overstating things. Beauty just isn't "crucial" to me at all, and it never will be...
Allure.com: have the power to remind us that we arenât defined by our reflections.
Elf: But this whole notion of "beauty" is so over-rated, and the industry is always telling potential buyers that they can look "better" by buying their silly over-priced beauty products.
Allure.com: âBeing free from mirrors can be a positive thing,â says Williams.
Elf: "free from mirrors" I've never been held hostage or enslaved by a mirror in my life.
Gah, so much drivel! Shut up!
Allure.com: âWeâre so judgmental of ourselves.
Elf: Thanks largely to the media and beauty industry always telling people "You can buy this product to make you look younger/sexier/prettier/absolutely beautiful" which is implying "there's something wrong with your appearance and we're here to fix it." And "You need to strive to make yourself beautiful!"
Take a hike!
Allure.com: Thereâs so much comparison in the world.
Elf: See above! If you're looking to send the opposite message, you're praising the wrong industry.
Allure.com: The fact that I canât constantly check my reflection means I can focus on how I feel within, and not how I look.â
Elf: Nothing like pointing out the obvious. Gah! I figured that out long ago. Now vamoose!