First, the world record stuff.
Will you get into the Guinness Book of World Records by perpetuating any meme with this claim?
Absolutely not.
It's a bald-faced lie.
Guinness does not recognize and include any chain letters as qualifying for world records. It takes skill and talent to get into the Guinness Book and it takes neither to spread memes.
Sparky McSparkles says: ✨"In fact, Guinness doesn't solicit anything like that and won't add any record that doesn't belong to a category already in their books. Guinness has addressed this chain letter as follows":
🧝‍♀️Guinness On Chain Letters (Written out here if you cannot access the article at the link.)
Chain Letters
London, 5th May 2006.
Guinness World Records does not recognise or verify chain letter world record claims under any circumstances.
Any correspondence alleging Guinness World Records is currently supporting an attempt to break a chain letter world record is false.
Chain letters are no longer recognised by Guinness World Records and no further claims will be accepted (whether they are requesting cards, compliments slips or any other items). People will not have their names published in any Guinness World Records book by participating in a chain letter.
🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: Now that's been cleared up, let's move on to mangle the meme.
Sometimes the chain is posted with parts missing, as in minus the world record stupidity, the Anne Wichert tale, or that awful kissing poem. It has been seen cropping up simply posted as "Why Guys Like Girls" and starting with the lame statement that girls smell good if it's just their shampoo. It is unclear why the slightly different mutations of what amounts to the same stupid crap, unless it's an attempt at fooling everyone into thinking it's something they haven't seen before.
Let the mondo mangle begin!
📧🔅Subject: RE: WHY BOY LIKE GIRLS! hahaha. i like this one Date: Fri, 2 Apr 2010 11:33:46 +0000
⛓👨Memes: This chain letter is real so follow the instructions and something good will happen!!
🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: Typical chain letter claim, and if you believe it, you may as well believe that you've just won the Golden Gate Bridge and surrounding property. All you have to do is send me your money and bank account info and I'll hand the property over to you tomorrow!
⛓👨Memes: LISTEN TO THIS LETTER AND GOOD LUCK!!!!!
🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: Too bad I can't honestly wish you good luck...
⛓👨Memes: Sorry, but this chain letter is for real.
🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: No, you're not sorry, and it's anything but for real.
⛓👨Memes: When Anne Wichert got it for the first time, she ignored it and a week later the love of her life dumped her for no good reason
🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: Awww, poor heart-broken, fictional Anne Wichert...
👱‍♀️oyamamama, Friday, July 30, 2010: I would love to meet this Anne Wichert person and tell her that it is quite common to get dumped for no good reason. It's not you, Anne, it's him. He would not have had a good reason, even if you had sent the chain mail within one hour to twenty five people.
⛓👨Memes: so BEWARE, and just send the stupid letter!!!!!!
🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: No…Beware, and do not send the letter or post it as is unless you want to risk the possibility of being thought of as "stupid". You'll certainly look stupid if you actually post/send it because you believed all its bullcrap claims.
⛓👨Memes: The Lovers of the Heart
🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: What the heck is that supposed to mean?
⛓👨Memes: In order to form a more perfect kiss, enable the mighty hug to promote to whom we please but one kiss.
🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: Huh? Nothing quite like using the wrong words in the wrong context to create a badly constructed phrase to really look like an idiot. So hugs are 'mighty' now, and they 'promote' kisses? *GONG!*
⛓👨Memes: Article 1: Statement of Love: The Kiss
🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: Blech.
⛓👨Memes: what
👨Meme1: each
👨‍🎓Meme2: a
👨👨‍🎓👨‍💻🧛‍♂️Memes: kiss means
🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: Oh, yay, How droll.
⛓👨Memes: Kiss on the
👨👨‍🎓Memes1&2: hand
👨‍💻Meme3: Forehead
👨Meme1: I adore you
👨‍🎓Meme2: You're
👨‍💻Meme3: - Be
👨‍🎓👨‍💻Memes2&3: mine!
👨‍💻Meme3: forever
🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: So beware, potential stalkerish slave, or slavish stalker, unless the person kissing your hand/forehead is not an idiot who believes in chain letters.
⛓👨Memes: Kiss on the cheek-
👨Meme1: I
👨‍💻Meme3: We're
👨👨‍💻Memes1&3: just
👨Meme1: want to be
👨👨‍💻Memes1&3: friends
👨‍🎓Meme2: Long time no see...
🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: This is how the chain mutates and changes things up, attempting to look new and original.
⛓👨Memes: Kiss on the
👨👨‍🎓👨‍💻Memes1/3: neck
🧛‍♂️Meme4: belly
👨👨‍🎓Memes1&2: I
👨‍💻🧛‍♂️Memes3&4: - I'm ready
🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: Ready to/for what? Spreading this dreck all over the net? You won't get a kiss for that.
👨👨‍🎓Memes1&2: want
👨‍🎓Meme2: to be with
👨👨‍🎓Memes1&2: you...
🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: Ewww! Go away!
⛓👨👨‍🎓Memes1&2: Kiss on the lips I love you
👨‍🎓Meme2: side of the lips - I really like you
🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: What difference does it make if you kiss on the side of the lips or straight on? Just get away!
⛓👨Memes: Kiss on the
👨Meme1: ears
👨‍🎓Meme2: ear
👨Meme1: I am
👨‍🎓Meme2: - I'm
👨Meme1: just playing
👨‍🎓Meme2: comfortable with you
🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: I'm not confortable with you, so buzz off!
👨‍🎓Meme2: nose - I like you
🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: I don't like you! *Punch*
⛓👨Memes: Kiss anywhere else lets not get carried away
🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: Just beat it!
⛓👨Memes: Kiss on the Shoulder: You mean so much...
🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: Yeah right, buzz off!
⛓👨Memes: Kiss on the Forehead: I missed you...
🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: Too bad for you. Go away.
⛓👨Memes: WHAT EACH GESTURE MEANS:
🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: *Rolling eyes*
⛓👨Memes: Look in your eyes kiss me Looking into each other's Eyes: I trust you!
🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: Sheesh, with such a difference, people could really get their signals crossed. Don't rely on chain letters telling you what kisses or body language means.
⛓👨Memes: Playing with your hair I can't live without you Let's fool around.
🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: In that case, the wind that plays with your hair must always be telling people "Let's fool around!" This is ridiculous.
If people believe this crap, it's little wonder society is so screwed up... If you can't even look another person in the eye any more - well...
⛓👨Memes: Holding Hands: You're mine.
🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: I thought you said that was kissing the hand. Oh well.
⛓👨Memes: Laughing while Kissing: You are perfect with me!
🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: No, it means simply that the two love-bugs are having a great time and enjoying each other's company. Nothing more, nothing less.
⛓👨Memes: Touching on the Butt: This is mine!
🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: Seriously? Well, if you must, hopefully you're touching your own butt, which would still be rather sad, and not trying to claim anyone else's as yours. You'd look very silly if you could actually do that and start wearing someone else's butt, plus, you'd have to go to the bathroom a lot more often, what fun. By the way, don't try that with me unless you want yours kicked.
⛓👨Memes: what hugs mean:
🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: Bleck! Look, a hug is a hug, and it's not so much the position of the hug but the way you hug and when.
⛓👨Memes: Holding you tight pressed against each other: Don't let go...
🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: In public that's called a public display of affection.
⛓👨Memes: Hand on your waist I love you to much to let you go
🧛‍♂️Meme4: hug from behind - You're my sweetheart
👨‍💻Meme3: Arms around the Waist: Be close to me.
🧛‍♂️Meme4: arms tightly around waist - I Love you too much to let go
🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf:Well deal with it, you can't literally hold on to someone forever. *Rolling eyes* Will you just let go of her/his waist already and let the person move!?
⛓👨Memes: hug around the shoulder - We're only friends
🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: Oh, so if a couple hugs around the shoulders that suddenly signifies they're "just friends'? Bull!
⛓👨Memes: what snuggling means:
🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: Bleck! I can tell you what it means, it means people are totally totally into each other! 'Nuff said!
⛓👨Memes: cuddling - we're only tried
🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: Same diff, idiot, call it a cuddle, call it a snuggle, same dang thing! So - you 'tried' cuddling? Thank goodness you didn't try it with me.
⛓👨Memes: snuggling - I love you
🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: I thought you said that was the kiss on the lips. Oh well, chain letter love-language is so corny and convoluted that a mere change in body position and you could be sending all kinds of mixed signals to some idiot who actually takes this stuff seriously.
⛓👨Memes: falling asleep while cuddling - I'm comfortable with you
🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: I thought you said that was kissing the ears.
⛓👨Memes: ADVICE:
🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: More like statements of stupidity.
⛓👨Memes: If you were thinking about someone while reading this, you're definitely in Love.
🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: Wrong! I'm definitely not in love with whoever started this idiotic chain, or the fools who pass it on. My thoughts about them are more along the line of telling them to get a clue.
⛓👨Memes: REQUIREMENTS:
🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: Shut it!
⛓👨Memes: Post this again after reading!! Or you will have a bad year of Relationships.
🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: Honestly, who in the world believes this crap? It's sad how many people either forward it to their friends, you know, sending bad luck chains to your friends is a very rude and stupid thing to do. Other people junk up their web pages, forums and blogs with this garbage. If you thought you were making your blog more interesting, or adding something great to a forum, you couldn't be more wrong. All you did was spam it up and make yourself look like an idiot.
⛓👨Memes: IF YOU (LIKE), (LOVE), OR (MISS) SOMEONE RIGHT NOW: - and can't get them out of your head.
🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: Not my problem.
⛓👨Memes: then Re-post this within One Minute and Whoever you are missing will surprise you.
🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: How can people know enough to operate a computer, experience such a serious brain-beltch and believe in and pass on this kruft? I don't get it. The fact is, no stupid chain letter can make someone you miss or love, surprise you.
⛓👨Memes: Re-post this as "what each kiss means."(:
🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: No, don't repost it. Be smart and rip it apart whenever you come across it instead.
⛓👨Memes: Article 2: The Three Steps
🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: Gah, how about stepping off?
🧙‍♀️Carolyn Nicole: to ruin your relationship 🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: Lol!
⛓👨Memes: 1. Girls: If any guys gets fresh with you, slap him.
🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: What kind of sentence is that? "guys gets fresh" so are you talking plurrel or singular here? Anyway, how I handle a guy getting fresh is my own business. I won't slap him if I'm interested in him.
⛓👨Memes: 2. Guys If any girl slaps you, her intentions are still good.
🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: ARGH! No, NO, NOOOOOOOOO! Let's get this straight, people: unless you're in a good relationship already and you and your lover like to play slapping games - a slap from a girl to some lewd guy trying to come on to her is the same as when she says no to sex and getting raped. A slap means "NO, and "No" means "NO!" So don't encourage guys to disrespect girls - EVER!
⛓👨Memes: 3. Guys & Girls Close your eyes when kissing, it is rude to stare .
🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: Chude: (because I do not know if you're a dude or a chick) that's so cliche, from bad romance fiction writing stereotypes. How people kiss is really none of your business. Kiss with your own eyes closed if you want to, but leave others to kiss in their own way, kay?
⛓👨Memes: Article 3: The Commandments
🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: *Glares* Not with the freaking parody of the ten commandments again!!
🧙‍♀️Carolyn Nicole: that ye skanks do bringeth from thine mountain of stupidity.
🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: Hahahaha!
⛓👨Memes: 1. Thou shall not squeeze too hard.
🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: Again, leave that up to personal preference. What's hard to you might not be to someone else. And lose the KJV-speak! Argh!
🧙‍♀️Carolyn Nicole: This makes the ketchup bottle get stuck in a squished position and is very difficult to get any more of the condiment out.
🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: Hehehehe!
⛓👨Memes: 2. Thou shall not ask for a kiss, but take one.
🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: I'm getting this stupid mental image I'm getting of a completely corny rom com scene where a guy and a girl are already cuddling, and he just looks at her and says "Can I have a kiss?" and she says "Yes, dear." like a child begging his mom for a cookie.
But if you follow this chain letter's idiotic "commandments" and just lay a smooch on just anybody whenever you feel like it, you're going to end up making people run for cover, or just sock you in that kisser!
⛓👨Memes: 3. Thou shall kiss at every opportunity.
🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: Uh, no! Go away!
🧙‍♀️Carolyn Nicole: For a greater chance to share diseases. Remember, sharing is caring and on the plus side, mono is in this year.
🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: Hahahaha! Good one.
⛓👨Memes: * Remember * A peach is a peach A plum is a plum, A kiss isn't a kiss Without some tongue.
🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: I guess I should be glad you finally gave up with the lame "commandments" business, but that's about as fruity and tacky an attempt at a rhyme I've seen. It doesn't even rhyme. Obviously you'll never be a poet, so give up now.
⛓👨Memes: So open up your mouth close your eyes, and give your tongue some exercise!!!
🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: Eww, no! Again, leave the kissing up to personal preference. Some of us are not into swapping spit!
⛓👨Memes: This was forwarded to me. I found it kinda sappy but kinda sweet.
🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: Sickly sweet.
⛓👨Memes: This was written by a guy)
🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: No kidding.
⛓👨Memes: Don’t break this; it’s so sweet!
🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: I'll do more than just break it. When I'm through with it you will see just how sweet it is.
⛓👨Memes: Here are a few reasons why guys like girls:
🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: I can give you a reason in one sentence - because that's how nature works…
🧙‍♀️Carolyn Nicole: Other than basic biology
🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: And over 20 statements is more than a few.
⛓👨Memes: 1. Girl's always smell good even if it is just shampoo
🧙‍♀️Carolyn Nicole: This is a lie.
🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: Obviously you've never been around girls after an intense workout, or girls with obnoxious perfume, or better still, bad breath!
🧙‍♀️Carolyn Nicole: Females can smell just as horrendous as any sweaty man.
⛓👨Memes: 2.. The way they call you after you just had a big fight.
🧙‍♀️Carolyn Nicole: Also wrong. Girls hold the grudge and she wont forgive until you call first.
🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: Some don't call until much later. A big fight usually means all parties need time to cool off and reflect a little before trying to discuss whatever the problem is.
⛓👨Memes: 3. The way their head always finds the right spot on our shoulders
🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: Er, uhm....My head tends to stay on my own shoulders and isn't likely to find a spot on somebody else's. That would make me headless and the other person a two-header. Cool - not...
⛓👨Memes: 4. How cute they look when they sleep
🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: Oh, sure, especially when they do things like snore, drool, let air, or toss the blankets off.
⛓👨Memes: 5. The ease in which they fit into our arms
🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: Not this girl...
⛓👨Memes: 6. The way they kiss you and all of sudden everything in the world is right
🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: Again, not this girl...
⛓👨Memes: 7. How cute they are when they eat
🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: Meh. Open mouth, insert food, chew, swallow, smile if the food's to one's liking, make a face if it isn't...What's so cute about that? Do guys not eat pretty much the same way?
⛓👨Memes: 8. The way it takes them hours to get dressed but in the end it's all worth while
🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: Uh, no, not this girl. I'm the grab a comfy, practical pair of pants and a top that go nicely together and put them on, and that takes less than a minute if I'm in a hurry.
⛓👨Memes: 9. Because they are always warm even if it's -30 outside
🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: Uhm no, again, definitely not this girl!
⛓👨Memes: 10. They look good no matter what they wear
🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: I doubt I'd look good in something way too tight or way too loose. Neither would I look good in anything indecent to go out in public.
⛓👨Memes: 11. The way they fish for compliments even though you both know that you think she's the most beautiful girl on earth
🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: Again, not this girl! I take my compliments with gratitude like most people, but sure don't go fishing for compliments - I simply don't need my ego stroked or to be flattered.
⛓👨Memes: 12. How cute they are when they argue
🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: You haven't seen me lose my temper. It's anything but "cute".
It's also an astoundingly stupid move on your part, telling a girl she's cute when you're arguing with her. It implies a number of things - 1. you get off on fighting with her or 2. You think she's such an air-headed bimbo so desperate for an ego-stroke that she'll just settle down, kiss you, and be so grateful for the compliment that she'll stop arguing with you so that you'll win. WRONG!
⛓👨Memes: 13. The way her hand always finds yours
🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: It's an odd creature that makes a habit of losing his hand to be "found" by some girl. Got two of my own anyway, so why would I even try to find yours?
⛓👨Memes: 14. The way they smile
🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: "Cute" when she argues, "cute" when she smiles, you can't seem to make up your mind, can you?
⛓👨Memes: 15. The way you feel after you see her name on your cell after you just had a big fight
🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: Not this girl, I tend not to communicate with people I'm too upset with. But as to your feelings, speak for yourself.
⛓👨Memes: 16. The way they say "lets not fight anymore"- even though you know that an hour later...
🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: An hour later, what? And I don't remember ever uttering that phrase during any disagreement with anyone.
⛓👨Memes: 17. The way they kiss you after a fight
🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: Ugh - no!
⛓👨Memes: 18. The way they kiss you when you do something nice for them
🧙‍♀️Carolyn Nicole: This does mean you have to do something nice for them first...
🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: I don't kiss people to show gratitude. I say thank you, and do something nice in turn, if I have some idea what.
⛓👨Memes: 19. The way they kiss you after you say "i love you"
🧙‍♀️Carolyn Nicole: Even if they don't realize you're lying!
🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: I don't go around kissing people at the drop of a few words.
⛓👨Memes: 20. Actually.. ... just The way they kiss you...
🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: Again, not...
🧙‍♀️Carolyn Nicole: Shallow arse!
⛓👨Memes: 21. The way they fall into your arms when they cry
🧙‍♀️Carolyn Nicole: You really find this attractive? Weirdo.
🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: If you think a girl in distress is cute, as in, some kind of attraction for you, you're a creep! Get away!
I rarely cry, and when I do, I prefer to be alone...So I'm not going to do the stereotypical damsel in distress crying thing like what you're more likely to see on TV or in the movies.
⛓👨Memes: 22. The way they apologize after crying over something that silly
🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: That's an adult thing - people generally get a little embarrassed when others see them cry. We don't like losing control of ourselves in front of others and making them feel alarmed that we're not okay at the moment.
⛓👨Memes: 23. The way they hit you and expect it to hurt *i think every girl is guilty of this! :)
🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: Dude, I haven't hit anyone since grade school.
🧙‍♀️Carolyn Nicole: Oh please, if we wanted it to hurt it would.
⛓👨Memes: 24. Then the way they apologize when it does hurt (even though we don't admit it)
🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: I never apologized either.
⛓👨Memes: 25. The way they say "i miss you"
🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: Nope, not this girl.
⛓👨Memes: 26. The way you miss them
🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: Well, I guess you can speak for yourself, then...
⛓👨Memes: 27. The way their tears make you want to change the world so it doesn't hurt her anymore.
🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: I've noticed you keep saying "they" as if you - well, nevermind, I'll come back to that later, but again, speak for yourself.
⛓👨Memes: Yet regardless if you love them, hate them, wish they would die or know that you would die without them, it matters not! Because once in your life, whatever they are to the world, they become everything to you. When you look them in the eyes, travel the depths of their souls and say a million things without trace of sound, you know that your own life is inevitable consumed within the rhythmic beats of her very heart. We love them for a million reasons, no paper do it justice. It is a thing of not the mind but the heart.
🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: My my, but you have got it bad for some chick, dude...Thank goodness it isn't me!
⛓👨Memes: A feeling. Only felt.
🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: Point being?
But back to what I was saying before about your "they" throughout this unbelievably gushy chain letter drivel - so, you must've experienced this stuff with a lot of girls in order to generalize, because you chose the girls who you figured would be "cute" enough for you...Or you started trying to get a relationship and each time, it never panned out, so you went on to the next...
Hah! I think I just figured out what your problem is!
You're all heart-broken, or more like just madder than heck and playing the jilted lover act, because Anne Wichert refused to pass along your dumb chain letter! So, you dumped her over it and now you're feeling sorry and foolish!
Hahahahahahahahahaha!
⛓👨Memes: This chain started in 1887. 1997. 2002.
🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: So, which is it?
There was no internet in 1887…
🧙‍♀️Carolyn Nicole: LOSERS.
According to Breakthechain.org, it started in 2001.
And it should've ended in 2001, preferably before it was ever circulated...
⛓👨Memes: It is a chain love letter. It is a love chain letter.
🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: There is no such thing.
A "love letter" is private, only for the one you love,
A "chain letter" (meme) always aims to get mass-produced to as much of the world as possible, and has nothing whatsoever to do with love, and everything to do with egomaniacs trying to control the masses.
⛓👨Memes: In an hour you are supposed to repost this. send it to 10 25 people.
🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: That statement proves what I just said.
🧙‍♀️Carolyn Nicole: Yeah that ain't gonna happen.
⛓👨Memes: It is easy, just look into chat rooms and find them.
🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: In other words, barge into chat rooms and post this dreck to a bunch of strangers. If you're looking to be called out as a spammer and an idiot, and to make enemies, this is the way to do it.
⛓👨Memes: Anyway, send it to 10 25 people in 1 hour.
🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: No...
🧙‍♀️Carolyn Nicole: Is it just me or does it sound like this is arguing with me?
⛓👨Memes: Now here comes the fun part.
🧙‍♀️Carolyn Nicole: Whoopdi frikkin doo.
🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: Dude, reality check: You're in serious need of a life if this is your idea of "fun".
⛓👨Memes: You then say the name of the person you love or like, then the person will say "I love you" or "would you go out with me".
🧙‍♀️Carolyn Nicole: The magic is in the Internet!
🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: *Snort splutter chortle*
⛓👨Memes: NO JOKE!!!
🧙‍♀️Carolyn Nicole: Uh huh...sure...
🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: First, lose the extra exclamation marks and the capslock.
Second, it is a joke, a very bad one, not even worth a grin.
AS for that going out love crush junk -
If you want that to work, you better go to Hollywood and submit this as a script, because you can't predict or control what exact words come out of the mouth of anybody otherwise...
⛓👨Memes: NOW THE CONQUENCES CONSEQUENCES!!!
🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: Outch - those screaming caplocks! And see how one version can't spell...
⛓👨Memes: If you break the chain letter,
🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: Nothing...
🧙‍♀️Carolyn Nicole: Aw snap!
⛓👨Memes: The conquences consequences are:
🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: And you did it again. I told you... Zip. Please, don't use words you can't spell, it only gives people something else besides the fact this is a stupid chain letter to roll their eyes and laugh at.
⛓👨Memes: If you break this chain letter, you will have bad luck with future relationships.
🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: Hogwash.
🧙‍♀️Carolyn Nicole: Come on, that's a given with 97% of the world anyway.
🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf:But, if you continue passing on or originating chain letters, you may very well end up having trouble with relationships, starting with the loss of friends who get annoyed and even embarrassed by your stupidity in spreading this junk.
⛓👨Memes: If you dont, don't break the chain, then you will be a happy camper.
🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: I'm amazed how anyone with two brain cells to rub together would actually believe this bull.
🧙‍♀️Carolyn Nicole: AKA Lonely person sitting at home alone reading chain mail all damn day.
⛓👨Memes: CoNgRatULaTioNs! ! Congratulations!!
🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: Explain why in one version, there are random upper-case letters in the word "Congratulations"
I don't recall sharing anything that might cause you to congratulate me...
⛓👨Memes: You have been chosen to participate in the LONGEST and LUCKIEST chain letter ever written on the internet.
🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: That's what a lot of chain letters say. I know better. Reality check: it's a big lie, all chain letters of this sort are bunk without even a reputable history of origin.
⛓👨Memes: Once you read, this letter, you must IMMEDIATELY (meaning within the hour)
🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: You cannot put time limits on anything I do, and I will not do anything you say I "must"...!
⛓👨Memes:be sent to 25 people
🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: Let me get this straight: *I* must be sent to 25 people within the hour after getting this chain letter? And you might want to put this nifty little thing called a period or dot at the end of your sentence.
🧙‍♀️Carolyn Nicole: HEY! You said 10 earlier!
⛓👨Memes: After you send it,
🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: I told you, no sending...!
⛓👨Memes: make a wish
🧙‍♀️Carolyn Nicole: Unicorn
⛓👨Memes: and post it with the title "why do boys fall in love with girls?"
🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: You have a heck of a huge ego and a lot of arrogant nerve to tell other people how to kiss, how to hug, and when to post what, and what to title the post.
⛓👨Memes: and it will come TRUE
🧙‍♀️Carolyn Nicole: LIES
🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: Typical big stinking chain letter lie. Of course no wish will come true after you send it on, it's not like these things are so powerful that they have magic in them that makes wishes come true whether you spread it or not.
⛓👨Memes: in the amount of time of days,
🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: no, actually, since chain letters can't grant wishes, and my wish would kill all chain letters including this one, so you see, that just doesn't work. I'm not going to make my wish come true by spreading chain letters when I wish they would stop spreading.
⛓👨Memes: as the time. For example, if you sent it @ 8:00, your wish will come true in eight days.
🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: Bollox. And this 8 days thing, you must've got that from the bogus numerology site Realwishes.com, which is anything but real. It's a scam.
⛓👨Memes: YOU MAY NOT WAIT FOR A CERTAIN TIME TO SEND IT........
🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: Stop shouting orders! I don't need your permission to do anything.
🧙‍♀️Carolyn Nicole:How many ways can you define immediately?
⛓👨Memes: REMEMBER, IT MUST BE SENT TO 10 25 PEOPLE
🧙‍♀️Carolyn Nicole: Gah! Pick a number dammit!
⛓👨Memes: WITHIN 5 DAYS, 1 HOUR,
🧙‍♀️Carolyn Nicole: IMMEDIATELY
⛓👨Memes: OR YOUR WISH WILL NOT COME TRUE!
🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: Repeat yourself much? And again with the screeching caplock, give it a rest! I still won't post it to 25 people, what's your obsession with that number about anyway? This drivel's not being sent within five days, or within the hour, or at 8:00 AM or PM. So now you're getting impatient.
Did I not already explain that I can't hope to kill chain letters by spreading them? I can't dumb that down to less than one syllable per word for you.
⛓👨Memes: If THIS CHAIN LETTER IS CONTINUED UNTIL THE YEAR 2945, IT WILL BE PLACED IN THE GUINNESS BOOK OF WORLD RECORDS!
🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: Wrong!
The Guinness Book does not and will not include chain letters in their category lists for world record setting.
And ouch! My poor eyes and ears! Those caps!
⛓👨Memes: PLEASE CONTINUE IT NOW!!!
🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: No, and stop shouting!
⛓👨Memes: *WARNING*
🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: Shut it!
🧙‍♀️Carolyn Nicole: Looks super official with astrix around it.
⛓👨Memes:IF YOU DO NOT PASS THIS ON,
🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: I will remain smarter than you.
⛓👨Memes: SOMETHING BAD
🧙‍♀️Carolyn Nicole: Gasp!
🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: *Laughs*
⛓👨Memes: OR WORSE
🧙‍♀️Carolyn Nicole: Worse than bad? Like, super bad?
⛓👨Memes: WILL HAPPEN TO YOU:
🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: And the moon is made of cheese...Anyway, bad, bad punctuation and caplock shouting, bad, bad, bad!
Clue, doofus, bad and worse stuff happens, and so does a lot of good stuff, things chain letters have no control over. Except for the bad feelings you generate by spreading this junk because your friends have started secretly hating you because you annoyed and insulted them and they realize you're stupid.
⛓👨Memes: * NOTE*
🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: Will you ever shut up?
⛓👨Memes: THE MORE PEOPLE YOU SEND THIS TO THE MORE LUCK YOU WILL HAVE IN YOUR LOVE LIFE.
🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: *Rolling eyes* I don't give a hoot about a love life. And the only luck I'd get from spamming this dumb hoax would be great luck showing everybody I was an idiot.
🧙‍♀️Carolyn Nicole: It will end up being the number of dating sites you are on.
🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: *Snicker*
⛓👨Memes: if you break this IF YOU BREAK THE CHAIN LETTER
🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: I will have outsmarted you.
🧙‍♀️Carolyn Nicole: Scandel!
🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: Rinse, lather, repeat, rinse, lather, repeat... Stupid caplock! And there wasn't an internet in 1887…
⛓👨Memes: YOU WILL HAVE BAD LUCK WITH YOUR LOVE LIFE FOR SEVEN 28 YEARS.
🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: Hah! You can't even make up your mind how long you want the bad luck to run. Either way, there is nothing you can do past causing anyone a brief period of extreme annoyance with this stupid chain letter, and the real bad luck goes to whoever's idiot enough to believe and spread this malarkey.
⛓👨Memes: (IT HAS BEEN GOING SINCE 1887 1997)
🧙‍♀️Carolyn Nicole: Wow you have no life.
🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: See how making chain letters has rotted the brain of this troll...
⛓👨Memes: THIS IS NO JOKE.
🧙‍♀️Carolyn Nicole: Yes it is.
🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: It's a stupid hoaxing joke.
⛓👨Memes: *BUT* Copy and Paste this email,
🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: To nowhere but a public mangling.
⛓👨Memes: GOOD LUCK!!!
🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: Good riddance!
⛓👨Memes: Now tell me isn't this the cutest thing that you have ever seen?
🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: *Spits*
⛓👨Memes: here is that catch
🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: You've been going on for ages about that catch and no amount of drawing it out is going to make it any truer…
⛓👨Memes:e-mail it to
🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: No one.
⛓👨Memes: 0 people -- nothing too bad will happen?
Miss 🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: Since you aren't sure, I'll clear it up for you. Nothing bad at all will happen, because by not sending it anywhere, I won't have annoyed anyone and made a fool of myself.
⛓👨Memes: 1-11 people -- you will
🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: NOT
⛓👨Memes: get a happy surprise!
🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: Because I would've annoyed at least one person.
⛓👨Memes: 12-21 people -- someone that likes you
🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: That someone doesn't exist, and I don't care.
⛓👨Memes: will
🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: NOT
⛓👨Memes: come out and tell you
🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: Because nonexistent people just don't come up to real people and say "Hey babe/dude, I likes ya!"
⛓👨Memes: 22-31 people -- someone that likes you
🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: still doesn't exist. and I still don't care.
⛓👨Memes: will
🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: NOT
⛓👨Memes: ask you out
🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: I don't date nonexistent people.
⛓👨Memes: 33-41+ people -- YOU WILL
🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: NOT:
⛓👨Memes: SEE (IT WILL BE GOOD)
🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: the only thing I would see is anywhere from 1 to 41+ people reacting to this idiocy, either taking the direct approach and telling me to wise up and stop with the spam, or else discreetly stepping away from me online.
As far as a wish, I do have one - that everybody on the planet would wise up and stop passing on this junk.
⛓👨Memes: Now repost this and somebody will say "I love you" tonight
🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: Bull. I don't want a lover and reposting this chain couldn't get me one anyway.
⛓👨Memes: C'mon Send it on!!!!!!!!!
🧙‍♀️Carolyn Nicole: NOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!! You can't make me!!!!!!!!!!
🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf: Shut it!
👱‍♀️oyamamama, Friday: My daughter peeked over my shoulder as I was writing my last post, and thought that I should share this chain mail with you. She particularly liked the part where it says this chain letter has been circulating since the 1800's.
She also thought the "a peach is a peach" poem was gross. And that the rest of it was pretty stupid, and she noticed that even though the email is about "why boys like girls," it was basically girls sending this information to other girls, with only one or two boys listed in the recipients.
That said, I think I need to talk to her about this email and try to temper the be-coy-to-catch-a-boy message that it sends, not to mention all this talk about kissing and slapping. I wonder if there are girls and boys at her school who are truly taking this to heart as what is "normal" behavior and what girls are "supposed" to do at this age ... makes me cringe. I suspect my husband will want to build a tower for our daughter, a la Rapunzel, and keep her there until she is at least 30 years old.
🧝‍♀️Ocean Elf:When you spread a meme, you are showing your friends how gullible you are, and you are decreasing the value of your emails, blog, content on social networks etc. You are putting yourself down on a level with the spammer and the stupid and you're wasting bandwidth as well as your time and everyone else's.
Over and out.
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