The next morning, "Santa," Jessica met him on the way to the kitchen, "NT is feeling frantic, worrying about her friends back at home. She's afraid Miranda will turn them into vampires or kill and eat them. Should we let her go?"
"I think that's a good idea. She is a protector, not a fighter by nature. Scared and rightly outraged as she is, she isn't cut out for war, and she shouldn't be the one to destroy an enemy if it comes to that."
"Good. So she can go as soon as Ameh arrives."
"Yes. Now,for those letters."
Jessica nodded. "It's light outside now, so we could send someone to get the written letters. And as for the texts and e-mails, we can get them just fine here."
Santa nodded. "Sounds good. I'll send Eubie and Gilda to pick up the letters."
Jessica smiled. "Good. I'll get the e-mails and texts, and get everyone gathered together."
Santa found Eubie and Gilda taking a break and talking quietly in a small sun room.
Hello, you two," he said quietly, "I have a job for you.
"Sure, what is it?" Eubie asked.
"I suppose you know about something about our situation," Santa said.
Yes, we heard about what happened to Elsa and one of our guests." said Gilda.
"And who is behind it." Eubie put in. "Scary to think we welcomed her in, having no idea she was the one preying on us."
Both elves shuddered.
"Good. So you know we need everything we can get against her. That's why I want you two to go and get all the paper letters Miranda sent us. Jessica is getting the display set up in the living room for our guests to read those sent by email and text."
We're on it." said Gilda.
Thanks." Santa said, and they went their separate ways.
Santa joined Jessica in the living room, where the others were assembled.
"Hi Santa."
"Hi yourself." he grinned back and gave a soft "Ho, ho, ho. Eubie and Gilda should be back in a while with the hand-written letters."
"Good. That gives me time to set up this display so you can all read the text and email letters. I think we need a new cable, this one seems to have a short."
"Lemme have a gander." said Elsa, and she came over to the large screen, and studied the cords.
"I'll be back with a couple of fresh ones." she said, and left the room.
In a little while, she returned with the new set of cables, which she plugged into the monitor and whatever else was needed.
"Huzzah! We're in business!" she announced when the screen lit up.
"Great! Thanks, Elsa." said Jessica with a smile.
"No problem." The elf said, giving Jessica a pleased smile, and taking her seat.
"We'll wait for Eubie and Gilda to come back with the paper letters. There are quite a few of those, but not as many or as recent as the cyber ones." Santa said.
"The older letters will show you what she was like as a small child." said Jessica. "There might be clues in the more recent digital letters to her plan somewhere in this mess."
It was about another fifteen minutes before Gilda and Eubie came back with their load to add to the pile.
"That's gonna be a load to slog through." said Gilda.
Eubie winced. "Most kids will write letters once, maybe a few more times, a year, and when they do, they're not terribly long. Miranda, on the other hand, bombarded us with letters. One day, we got a five page letter from her, and it was ALL one big whine! She spent the first two pages complaining about her life and how horrible it was, the next two on how horrible we were for not giving her everything she wanted, and then she finished up with a page of threats and insults."
"I remember that five-pager, and some she's written since."
The room was filled with a pleasant dull rustle as people looked through their papers, occasionally showing and snickering over the laughable contents. When everyone had passed around and read the paper mail, Jessica loaded the emails and texts to the big screen, making sure not to scroll too quickly.
From early on, the letters had been off-putting.
The very first email letter was written in Miranda's twelfth year.
--
Dear Santa, ho ho ho ha ha ha.
Well Im @ a slumber party & we're playing truth-or-dare, & Michelle dared me 2 write 2u & tell u2 jump off a bridge.
So, go jump off a bridge.
Im pretty sure u cant becasue u either dont exist or ur2f@2 do anythign but waddle so jumpings out of the question.
Miranda Tompkins.
P.S. MICHELLE SAUNDERS PUT ME UP TO IT!
--
Pippi grunted in displeasure and glared at the words in front of her.
"Wow, what a winner." Iris said sarcastically.
Bethan nodded.
Pippi frowned.
"She strikes me as the shallow-minded type who would write this kind of trash." said Gretel.
When Miranda was in her early teens, she wrote letters about school, boys, and girls who got better marks than her. Though it was very easy to see why her schooling suffered.
--
Dear Santa
I wouldnt bother u with this but Im desperate. Mrs. Jenkins gave me a d on my social asignment She gave th@ stupid wench Alanna a b. & Alanna doesnt deserve it becuase she doesnt even study.
Not only th@, shes a wench. shes always trying to get Jeff Roberts 2 notice her. Jeff is so smart and so cute. Please get him 2 like me instead of Alanna!
Miranda Tompkins.
--
What, seriously?" Gretel snickered.
--
Dear Santa
Something most amazing happened! In art class we had a guest speaker. Cameron Williams. Hes a DREAM! & hes so gr8 with a brush. Please get me a set of professional quality paints, brushes, everythign a real artist needs. I want 2b a painter!
Miranda Tompkins
--
Not even a week later, another letter said:
--
Dear Santa
Forget what I said about painting. I want 2b a film producer.
This guest speaker in drama, Peter Wilkes showed us stuff about his work. AAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH! Hes so, so, soooo
Hes totally hot!
So Id like a movie camera, the make-up, & mayb some day I can produce movies with him.
Please get Tyler Henderson 2 back off. Just becasue he helped me with my homework once doesnt mean I want to go out with him. Hes more Nicoles type, homely and f@. I told him to get lost & he gave me this real stupid little puppy dog hurt look as if I just ran over his cat or somethign. & then Sarah Smith of all people had the nerve 2 call me stuck up!
Cassie Parsons sure turned out 2b a huge backstabber. After all I did 2 help her with her part in the play, she just turns around and chums up 2 Lisa & Maureen. & did she not think I didnt notice the way she looks at Chris?
Th@ play was a disaster anyway. My part was so small & so stupid & nobody mentioned me when the people who put it on got thanked at the end!
If you could write these people & tell them 2 b alot kinder 2me Id appreciate it.
Miranda Tompkins.
--
Several people were laughing out loud by the end of that one.
On Christmas Day that year:
"Dear Santa
Daddy got me a camera but it wasnt exacly like the 1 Peter Wilkes had. Everythign I've been getting has been from him or his employees. Why have u forgotten me?
& its not just this year.
Ever since I could read, nothing ever comes from u.
Miranda Tompkins
--
"Aww, poor baby." said Iris.
A year later, the letters began to get a little darker.
--
Dear Santa
Sarah Smith thinks shell wow everybody, especialy her ex-boyfriend Dave Johnston with her lousy dance thing. She thinks shes so hot, but she needs 2b tought a lesson. Dave is mine now! Please do something like put a run in her nylons or better still, shrink her dress so she cant change into it or shell split it in the middle of her preformense. Serve the f@ wench right. She needs to kno her place & keep her scaly stupid mits off other peoples boyfriends. She dances like a pig on a pin anyway.
Miranda Tompkins
--
Dear Santa
U didnt make Sarah flop @ th@ stupid talent show & I didnt even get in third place! Melissa Watson won with her dumb little song & burning cat voice! Everybody complimented her but nobody said anything 2 me, & I PUT MY HEART in2 th@ stupid freaking dance! All for nothing!
Oh well, at least nobody complimented Sarah Smith either. But Dave didnt have 2 go sucking up 2 th@ Melissa after 1 lousy stupid boring little song did he? I danced my freaking heart out 4him & he doesnt even notice me! Its like I dont exist!
Give them all cole 4 all I care but I want a whole new wardrobe, a 30 or bigger screen TV, a computer with better internet, a new coat, makeup, a manicure, a pedicure, a facial, the best and newest cell phone…
Miranda Tompkins.
--
I wonder what her dance must've looked like." said Bethan.
"She would've done better to ask for spelling lessons." Gretel muttered, rolling her eyes. "What a scream.
"And a conscience." Pippi added darkly.
Ameh arrived in the meantime, but she didn't ring to be let in right away.
She took time to admire the beautiful scenery and walk around outside, looking for things amiss.
She breathed in the crisp fresh air and gazed at the sunlit branches glistening with glowing Christmas snow.
Eventually, she came upon a snowman.
"I wonder if that's Frosty?" she said to herself, "Sure looks like him." She approached and stared. "Frosty?"
There was no answer.
Ameh noticed the hat which had fallen behind him. She picked it up and was about to put it back on his head again when she recoiled suddenly, letting it drop in the snow.
Back inside, Gretel's derisive laughter soon turned to horrified disgust as the letters went on. The text/leet-speak being the least of it.
Miranda's letters started coming in one summer.
--
Dear Santa
Daddys ungrateful employees r such greedy inhuman selfish incompetent low-lifes th@ theyve mounted a class-action lawsuit claiming he was abusive! Abusive! Can u imagine!?
Ariel, the dull old cow who's been the main 1 in charge of me since I was little, had the nerve to accuse him of the worst of it. She says shes carrying his lovechild if u can imagine!
If there really is a baby, could u make it really homely, or better still, miscarry it? No matter whose it is, its not like I need some squalling demanding little rugrat around. Oh, & both Daddy & Ariel have magic, hes a mage, shes a fairy, and Im afraid if there is a baby th@ its dna will get magicked out 2look like Daddys its father, & I kno it isnt. Ariels got some nerve crying abuse! Please, do somethign about it!
Miranda Tompkins
--
What!" Bethan looked about to blow a fuze. "Miscarry it!? What an appalling excuse for a human being!"
There were nods and similar appalled expressions from all assembled.
When the hubbub subsided, Pippi put in her two cents.
"Lovechild my foot!" she spat, glowering.
Santa looked sadly at Pippi, and responded. "Anything but, I know. Mr. tompkins knew nothing of the concept of love. Miranda learned quickly how to make out as if the victim was the villain. No amount of self-pity from her validates that poisonous hatred."
Outside, Ameh stood as if frozen for a few moments,trying to catch her breath.
She startled at the sound of what she thought were voices in the distance, but they soon faded or stopped and she could hear them no more.
She waited a few more moments, then cautiously squatted down to pick up the hat.
When she did, she fought against the urge to recoil and drop it again. She stood, shivering and holding the hat, face indicating she was waging an unseen battle of some sort.
Finally, lest she drop the hat again, she reached up and put it on her own head.
For a time, nothing seemed to happen.
Then, Ameh stopped shaking, and her face went from pain and fear to an expression of calmness.
After some time, she removed the hat and held it. The terrible feelings didn't return.
She dropped the hat on the ground and waited. Then, she picked it up again after another few moments.
It must've been safe, because she didn't react badly.
"Now, Frosty, let's see if it works for you." Ameh put the hat on Frosty's head.
"Happy birthday!" Frosty exclaimed with a snowy smile.
"Happy birthday to you too!" Ameh replied, smiling triumphantly back. "You better make yourself scarce until it's safe for you to be here."
"It isn't safe? What happened?"
"Let's just say your magic hat got into some very wrong hands. If I was you, I'd get the first ride out of here for some other place until all this is settled, and whatever you do, keep hold of that hat."
"Thank you, ma'am." And with that, Frosty hurried away.
Ameh walked off.
Inside, letters were still being read through.
Halloween night.
--
Dear Santa
Daddy is being so stubborn & unfair about me & Brad Wiseman. Hes grounded me even through Halloween & says Im way 2 old 2 trick-or-treat. Not that I realy wanted 2 do th@ anyway, th@s kids stuff. I just wanted 2 hit the mall. Anyway Im stuck hear watching TV.
But its almost worth it.
Theres this realy charming vampire in this movie. Way hotter than Brad anyway. & hes realy upper class, so Daddy wouldnt have any reason not 2 like him.
U kno something about magic & super powers & all th@, could u send me a vampire who might turn me in2 1? Oooooooooooohhhhhh! What I wouldnt give 2 b imortal & spend imortality with th@ hunk!
& th@ stupid old cow Ariels bigger than a house which means th@ stupid stupid STOOPID kid is still hanging over Daddy like a nucular bomb and toxic waste threat. Please turn it in2 a big lump of cole or better, have it turn out 2b nothing but a huge blob of belly f@ter a giant tumour!
If I were a vampire, I would settle this 1ce &4all!
Miranda Tompkins
--
Iris uttered a growling shout, stamping her foot.
Several others gaped.
Pippi's expression had turned to white hot rage by the time she read that one. "I was definitely much too easy on her." she growled. "If I'd known then what I do now…"
"What a twisted sick - " Gretel seethed, biting her tongue.
That is truly awful!" Gilda exclaimed.
"I feel like I'll have to wash my mind out after this." Eubie agreed.
"If this thing is what we're up against," Elsa said menacingly, then trailed off.
The reading continued.
Christmas of that year:
--
Dear Santa
Why rn't u listening 2 anything I say? Why r u ignoring me?
Daddys being persicuted & wrongly prosicuted & Jim & I broke up, hes started seeing Meghan of all the airheads, my report cards have sucked l8ly & I kno the teachers all h8 me.
Daddys health isnt what it should b, thanks 2 the stress from th@ stupid lawsuit & stupid cow Ariel & th@ damn kid th@s still kicking around!
Make all those losers back off already! @ least do something 2 get rid of th@ cancerous kid b4 it can get born & cause a ton of problems.
Miranda Tompkins.
--
Gretel stamped her foot in disgust.
another letter dated a couple months later said:
--
Dear Santa
Hurray! Theyre gone! If ur the 1 who got rid of Ariel & that blasted leach kid, I thank u from the bottom of my heart! Mayb now things can start getting back 2 normal & the other dumbarses who braught on this stupid lawsuit will drop it. I'm too old & grown up 4 a stupid nanny anyway.
Jims a jerk. He actualy told me I was hard to get along with! I might've known hed stick up for Maureen, who had no business butting in2a fight btween Lisa & me th@ Lisa started!
I still want 2b a vampire. Id like 2 bcome 1 by next xmas, so that should give u enough time 2 contact any vampires u mite kno & send them my way.
Miranda Tompkins
--
"As if you'd be chumming around with vampires, Santa, what kind of airhead does she take you for?" Iris said incredulously.
"'Mite?" Gretel smirked. "M I T E? No wonder her marks were crappy."
--
Dear Santa
R u there?
R u 4real?
Or r u just a big freaking fraud?
U havent answered a single letter Ive written & tho things have settled down about my Daddy and those thick ape employees, school sux. I mean it REALY SUX! Sux sux sux sux sux sux SUX
S
U
X!
Nobody likes me. All my friends r ex-friends because the boys r total jerks. The teachers r square old tools th@ r always playing favourites and h8ing me. Theyre always giving me marks th@ are low so th@ Im always near the bottom of the class, and then they get all patronizing with there lectures about how I have 2 work hard like everybody else as if Im not? Give me a brake!
Miranda Tompkins
--
Dear Santa
Have u gotten anywhere with the vampires yet? will u send someone 2 me?
I need 2 bcome a vampire right away becasue somethign terible has happened.
We thot Ariel & her parasitic spawn were out of our lives, well, Daddy found out Ariel turned up on a hospital & shes got this freak kid who looks like a grownup but was supposedly born two weeks ago or somethign. Gosh, th@ thing mustve grown like bacteria in a sewer since the old cow welped it.
This means trouble.
Please help me bcome a vampire so I can stop them b4 they destroy Daddys good reputation!
Miranda Tompkins
--
There were many more of these written.
--
"Dear Santa
I cant blieve it!
They tossed Daddy in jail and Ive been sent 2 live with Old Cow Ariel & her freak kid Nt. What kind of dumb name is th@? NT? Th@s not even a name. But Ariel never was a reasonable or creative person.
These dullwits r sharing the house with a couple friends. 1 seems nice enough, & shes famous, so mayb if I can play things right, I can @least get her on my side. Shes a red-head called Pippi Longstocking. & if she can exist, I have more of a hope th@ u also exist, which means u mustve been 2 busy 2b bothered about me.
Th@ hurts, u kno.
Th@ really stings!
Ive been writing 2u4 ages, and u just ignore me like everybody else.
Rnt u supposed 2b all about caring & kindness?
How could u just sit back & let all these losers trample all over me like a doorm@?
It just cut's me 2 the quick!
I thot u would understand. I thot u @ least, u of all people, would care!
The other woman is a fright. Her name is Danae Monroe (cross between a Greek goddess & a movie star?) But shes no Marilyn Monroe. Shes tall, dark, realy blunt, & she could kill a kitten from a hundred yards away with 1 of her glare's. She wouldnt have 2 make herself up 2 pass 4 a monster in a horror movie.
Worse, I have 2 share a room with this walking nightmare!
Please, get me out of here!
Miranda Tompkins
--
Pippi winsed. "I never liked her. Now, the thought of her admiring me for any reason, makes me cringe. At least Danae would probably get a kick out of the way she was described in this one."
--
Dear Santa
1ce again, Ive been stabbed in the back.
With the help of what I thot was a new mage friend, I moved out of th@ black pit where dwell the stupid old cow and her freakish spawn.
But now this so-called friend Iona has designs on my favorite singer, Mr. Un. She actualy got us moved in2 his place, but Im sick of her & all the other fangirls their. Its supposed 2b just Mr. Un and me. He told me I was pretty, prettier than any other girl th@ walked the earth.
So than he lets all the other groupees bow & scream 4 him & he compliments them when he's supposed 2b looking @me!
Obviously he wont make me in2 a vampire & cant b bothered getting me in touch with someone who can. He has magic but he uses it all up on his shows & on all those other stupid ugly girls! Theyres enough of them around 2 feed a vampire 4 a long time if u would get on it and send me a vampire. I'd marry him & give him these silly girls for nourishment & then Iona and this lying 2faced super rock star would learn a lesson!
Miranda Tompkins
--
The letters went on, and they were all out cuss-fests against Santa for letting Miranda's daddy fall from his pedestal of false grace. Anger at Daddy for betraying her with that rock star impersonation, it had been him all along, carrying out an agenda against the real celebrity, and Iona had known it. Anger at Iona for her part in the deception. Anger at Iona for running off and at the others for not going after and punishing her.
Then anger at NT for not forgiving her and for saying unkind things to her. Anger at the residents of the townhouse for not paying her enough attention. Extreme anger for the vampire hunters that killed her lover Jacquan. But that probably explained how she herself had become a vampire.
Then came:
--
Dear Santa
I am now a vampire & Ive killed the people who destroyed my sweet Jacquan.
The only comfort I get now is re-reading his love letter.
Now its ur turn.
U ignored me all my life!
Jacquan is gone.
NT still h8s me.
Daddy bretayed me.
Th@ Brett wench took him down.
If I ever find Brett & NT again wont they b in 4 a nasty shock!
I kno I can find out where they live thru u. All I have to do is get hold of ur naughty & nice lists.
--
Santa let the others read the letter he finally wrote back, telling Miranda to stop.
--
Dear Miranda Tompkins/Harlan
I only use the word "dear" as a formality, it does in no way reflect any feelings I may or may not have toward you.
I must ask you to cease and desist writing to me. By your unconscionable acts and appalling attitude, you have earned a permanent ban from the Nice List. You couldn't even make it to the Naughty List. You have joined the others who have gone beyond naughty and into the realm of evil.
Therefore, my reasons for dismissing your many, many demands in the past and now, are justified.
Please don't waste any more time and effort, yours as well as mine, on these letters. I am busy enough as it is, trying to keep up with the others, and many of them truly need the things they request.
If you had wished for good, and requested me to give pleasant or even needed things to those around you, and you had not acted in and supported some very twisted, cruel things, you would have been far better off.
Sincerely
Santa Claus
--
--
Santa
This isn't over yet.
Ur just like all the others!
Ur a fraud!
Backstabber!
Fake!
Hipocryte!
U only care about the people u choose 2!
U don't care th@ -
--
And it was more of the same whining about how her life stunk from the time she first got interested in boys.
--
Uve never had anybody turn against u or maybe u have & just don't care.
But just wait until it happens.
How would u like it if all ur slaves - excuse me, elves, became vampires & suddenly grew minds of there own?
Perhaps Ill turn u into a vampire. Wouldn't that be a laugh!
On second thought u need a taste of 9/11.
If ur so determined 2 deny me all my life, it's unlike now, u will pay the ultimate price!
Miranda
--
"That one is dated a week ago." said Jessica. "It must've been one we just skimmed and didn't read the whole thing. She's planning to kill us!"
The doorbell rang.
Santa nodded grimly at Jessica and said "I'll be back.
Ameh waited at the door.
"Who is there?" Santa called from inside.
"It's Ameh Chase, a friend of your guests!"
Santa wanted to make sure. After what had been going on, he was not keen on simply letting strangers into the house. "Which guests?"
"Pippi Longstocking, Cosima Brett," Ameh rattled off all their names.
Santa asked her a couple more questions which she alone knew the answers to, and she was let in.
Santa escorted her to the room where Pippi sat with some of the others, pouring over Miranda's vile letters.
"I thought you should all know," Ameh said seriously, "Frosty had a terrible thing done to his magic hat. It would've made him come to life again when removed and put back on his head, but he would've been a completely different and evil snowman. I got rid of that curse and sent him away from here, restored and grateful."
"Making him evil?" Gretel asked. "This Miranda knows no bounds."
"Very, very evil." said Ameh. "His curse would've turned him into a killer. And he would've killed me among others."
Pippi's jaw dropped.
Ameh continued. "Specifically Danae, NT, and Cosima. We all like Frosty, Ariel in particular was always fond of his story and the song about it. Miranda must've known that from growing up with her. So in his cursed murderous form, he could've gone to your home," Ameh looked at Pippi, "been welcomed, not suspected in the least, and somehow manage to kill you all, then from there, come to my place and kill me and so on."
--